Susan Donovan: Aint too proud to beg

Josie gritted her teeth while trying to smile politely.

The old lady wasnt done. And, I must be honest with you, I think its going to take great courage to embrace what you ask for.

Josie yanked her hand away and retreated out the door. She backed out of the Needleman driveway, tires squealing, wondering what the old lady meant by that remark about courage. Plus, why the hell did everythingincluding her love lifehave a deadline?

Josie was so disconcerted that she nearly caused the tragic deaths of several pedestrians.

She was half awake when the light began to find its way west to San Francisco, peeking around the edge of the Transamerica Pyramid. Theyd made it, and Josie was proud of their tenacity. After thirteen hours of loitering, she and Genghis had ended up fourth in line at the grand opening of the newest Celestial Pet Superstore, where they soon would claim their prize of an entire years worth of free dog grooming.

Josie looked at the group that remained. Weaker and less disciplined individuals had voluntarily thinned the herd as the night dragged on, complaining of exhaustion or boredom. But Josie and Genghis had come prepared for a sidewalk vigiliPod, laptop, blanket, folding chair, chew toys, and a thermos of coffee. The coffee was for Josie. The chew toys were for Genghis. So was the folding chair, as it turned out.

While most people and dogs slept in the pale sunlight, Josie took out her laptop and decided to get it over with. All night shed been mulling over the slightly scary Mrs. Needleman and her suggestion that she write down what she wanted in a man, then send it out to the universebefore daybreak. And sunrise was just minutes away.

What was the worst thing that could happen? Shed not find her ideal man?

She was already there. Besides, creating this kind of list would show the women in her dog-walking group that they were wrong about her. Bea, especially, was always telling Josie that she didnt have the life she wanted because she didnt /know/ what she wanted.

Ha! Shed show Bea! Shed show them all! Josie knew exactly what she wanted, and she started typing.

MY MAN

Is kind Funny Respects himself and others Loves dogs Is intelligent (though not necessarily an Ivy League graduate) Is passionate about his work, whether hes a garbage man or a CEO Is generous to a fault Is a deep thinker Has overcome obstacles in his life Appreciates nature Believes in a force greater than himself (but doesnt even need to call it God) Josie stopped there because the next few things that popped into her head werent so noble. They were downright pornographic. Shed gone three months without actual sex so that was to be expected. And so what? No one would ever see this list, right? Its not like the universe would tattle to her mother. Besides, Mrs. Needleman said to be precise. Josie wrote on.

My man loves the feel of skin on skin and cant get enough touching, snuggling, caressing He has eyes that reveal his true soul He kisses so good I get light-headed He has a wild imagination in bed He is well endowed (not circus-act material, but something on the largish side) Can go all night Wants to have babies with me She stopped again, looking up and down the sidewalk furtively. She met the eye of the man next to her in line, a skinhead with a long-haired wiener dog. She quickly looked away. Had he noticed her heavy breathing?

That shed started to sweat? Josie adjusted her position on the blanket and recrossed her legs. She changed gears.

He'll love old houses

He'll be a safe and courteous driver He wont mind cooking every once in a while Hell rub my feet and ask me about my day Hell go to the North Pole with me before its too late Hey! You just spilled your bloody fuckin coffee all over my bloody fuckin spot!

Oh, God, Im so sorry! Josie scrambled to her feet and used the corner of her blanket to sop up the spill before it reached the skinheads camouflage sleeping bag. She smiled sheepishly. Since shed detected a British accent, she added, Cheers, mate.

Josie plopped back down. She decided the list was as complete as it could be, so she hit the save key and placed her order with the universe.

It was done. The sun came up.

Suddenly, she felt a prick of discomfort and looked toward the skinhead again. He wagged a pierced eyebrow in her direction. She gave him the benefit of the doubtmaybe this guy had courteous driver written all over his face but she just couldnt see it because of all the other tattoos.

She silently amended her list. /Dear Universe, Id really appreciate it if my man were tattoo-free. Thank you./ The lights of Celestial Pet flickered on at precisely seven-thirty.

Employees scurried about, taping down helium balloons, turning on cash registers, adjusting elaborate product displays. Through the glass, Josie could see the sign for the grooming salon, just off to the right.

Victory was in sight.

At eight oclock sharp, a smiling woman in a deep blue vest came to the front and ceremoniously used a set of keys to open the doors. Josie had already packed up the coffee-stained blanket, the laptop, folding chair, iPod, chew toys, and empty thermos. However, as the doors opened, it dawned on her that shed neglected to look in a mirror. She hadnt freshened her lip gloss or run a brush through her curls. Surely she looked like a woman whod pulled an all-nighter on a sidewalk.

The group cleared the doors and made a beeline to the grooming center.

Three small reception desks were set up, and the three people ahead of Josie were immediately registered for their freebies. She had to wait patiently. When it was her turn, a young blond girl waved her and Genghis over, then promptly left her station. Josie was pissed! If that girl didnt hurry up and get back, numbers five through eleven would get the coveted spots, and she hadnt been waiting outside for thirteen hours for nothing!

The skinhead was being served ahead of Josie. Same for the guy who was behind him!

In her mind she began to compose a letter to the Celestial Pet corporate offices. /The slipshod organization of your grand opening robbed me of my hard-earned years worth of free dog groomings…/ Looks like we have a winner. May I get your name?

The blond girl had been replaced by… /him./ The cheap blue vest looked ridiculous on the man. He was well over six feet, solidly built.

Somewhere in his mid-thirties. Sandy brown hair cut in short waves. Eyes so green and luminous it was like staring up into an enchanted forest.

His smile was deadlywhite teeth and full lips that promised a kiss of cosmic magnitude. If it werent for the elaborate tattoo peeking out of the left side of his shirt collar, the guy could have been a male model.

Or the man on her list.

Josie cursed herself for looking like a shopping cart lady on what was obviously going to be one of the biggest days of her life. Then the most extraordinary thing happened.

Josie couldnt move. She couldnt speak. All she could do was stare at him. And a strange, heated energy began flowing through her body, looping to the gorgeous dog groomer and back to her, gaining power with each pass. She felt as if she were on fire inside, a liquid molten fire that left her tingling everywhere.

The energy disappeared as suddenly as it had started. Genghis jumped up and put his paws on the counter, and the man reached out and gave his head a rub.

Okay then, he said to the dog as he sat down at a computer. Since your owner seems to be on the shy side, maybe Ill get started with your name.

Genghis, Josie said, answering for her dog.

The groomer peered at the panting, happy-as-hell dog, trying to find a pair of eyes under all the hair. He doesnt strike me as the marauding-warlord type.

My sister named him, Josie said, as if that explained everything. The synapses in her brain started to fire again, and she gave herself a mental face slap. This was her moment to shine! Her physical appearance might be middle-of-the-road on her best day, but her wit was consistently sparkling, and Josie would not walk away from this counter without this mega-fine man being aware of that fact.