Susan Mallery: Only Yours

They talked about local gossip—how the Fool’s Gold cheerleaders were off to their annual camp, and that Ethan and Liz were taking all their kids to Hawaii for a week.

“How are things with Simon?” Dakota asked, sounding casual.

Montana wasn’t fooled. “We broke up.”

Pia sat up. “Was I supposed to know this?”

“No. It just happened last night.”

“Are you okay?” Nevada asked. “Want to get Kent and Ethan to beat him up?”

“No. No one should hurt him. It’s fine.”

Pia leaned toward her. “Fine? You’re wearing about sixteen layers of concealer.”

“I didn’t sleep well.”

She’d also cried a lot, thrown a few pillows and had eaten nearly a pint of Ben & Jerry’s.

Not only had he broken up with her, but he’d been mean about it. He’d done his best to wound her, and that was the part she didn’t understand. Simon was many things, including distant and emotionally elusive, but he wasn’t unkind by nature.

She’d seen him with his patients. She knew how much they meant to him and what he sacrificed for them. Which meant lashing out at her had been about something else.

Fear, maybe. She’d been the one to break the unspoken rules. She’d been the one to fall for him.

“Want to tell us what happened?” Nevada asked.

Montana kissed the sleeping baby’s cheek. “We went to the fundraiser. Apparently Ethan and Kent took him aside and basically asked his intentions.”

Her brothers had confessed all shortly after Simon had left. They’d been concerned his abrupt departure had been about them. At the time she’d laughed and reassured them. How wrong she’d been.

All three women groaned.

“I know they were trying to help,” Dakota muttered. “Brothers.”

“Tell me about it.” Nevada sounded disgusted. “Then what happened?”

“Simon walked over and asked me if I was in love with him.”

She glanced up at three identical expressions of shock.

“What did you say?” Pia asked.

“I told him the truth. That I did love him. Then he got paged to go back to the hospital.”

She explained about Kalinda, how she’d nearly died, and how Simon had taken off.

“That was it. He showed up at my house about three hours later and told me it was over.”

She didn’t repeat what he’d said—there was no point in having her friends hate him.

“I knew what he was like when I got involved with him.”

Dakota glared at her. “Tell me you’re not taking responsibility for the breakup. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I know I didn’t, and don’t worry. I’m not saying it’s my fault. I’m saying I knew what he was when I let him in. To me, this is no different than going out with a guy who warns you at the beginning that he cheats, and then being shocked when you find him in bed with another woman. Simon told me he didn’t get involved. I knew he wasn’t looking for a commitment or a place to settle. He was always going to move on. I thought I was protecting myself, but I wasn’t.”

She looked at all three of them. “I don’t regret loving him.”

“Finn was going to leave, too,” Dakota told her. “Maybe Simon will change his mind.”

Montana shrugged. She figured that was pretty unlikely. “It’s not that I don’t hurt, I do. But I can’t find anyone to blame. Neither of us did anything wrong.”

“Are you pregnant?” Nevada asked. “If you were, he might want to stay.”

“There’s a happy way to start a relationship,” Montana told her. “I’m not pregnant, and I’m not interested in a man who would only stay for the sake of a child.”

“You’re so calm,” Pia told her.

“That’s because I’m at the crying-on-the-inside stage.” Montana swallowed. “I do love him and I don’t want him to go, but there’s nothing I can say to change his mind.” She glared at them. “I don’t want any of you saying anything, either.”

“Would we do that?” Nevada asked.

“In a heartbeat. I want you to promise.”

They all swore they wouldn’t say a word.

“Good.”

Montana continued to cuddle the baby. She was pleased she sounded so in control and that she’d managed to fool three people who loved her. The truth was she felt shattered by what had happened. She wanted to say she would do anything to get Simon to return her feelings, even a little.

Except that wasn’t true. Her heart might hurt with every beat, but she’d managed to do the right thing. To accept what had happened and believe in her ability to heal.

It had taken her a long time, but she’d finally grown up. Eventually, she would learn to move on. To forget about Simon. To fall in love with someone else.

“There’s always hope,” she whispered to the baby in her arms. “You need to remember that.”

SIMON SPENT THE NEXT several days waiting for someone to attack him. He was sure that it was only a matter of time until he was confronted by a mob, all of them demanding he do the right thing where Montana was concerned.

Instead, people were just as friendly as they had always been. They smiled, they asked about his patients, they suggested things for him to do on the weekend. As if nothing had changed.

The only thing he could figure out was that Montana hadn’t told anybody. But why would she keep that information to herself? She must hate him. A scorned woman and all that.

He finished his rounds early on Saturday and found himself at loose ends. There was yet another festival in town, something to do with crafts. He walked through the crowd, grabbing a quick lunch at one of the food stands, then stood there with nothing to do and no one to see. Finally he decided he would go to the bookstore and get something to read.

As he turned in that direction, he caught sight of a familiar shape. A woman with blond hair. Several people stepped between them and he couldn’t see her anymore, so he hurried in her direction. His heart quickened as need filled him.

He raced toward her, only to stop by a woman selling glass bead earrings. What the hell was he doing? He couldn’t go after Montana. He’d ended things. Worse, he’d hurt her.

He reminded himself that this was what he wanted. To be alone. It was the way things were. But still, he ached for her. Not just her body next to his, but her smile, her laugh, the things she said. He’d never wanted anyone as much as he wanted Montana and he’d never missed anyone as much.

The blond woman moved to her left and he saw her then, the shape of her face and her much shorter hair, and knew it wasn’t Montana. It was one of her sisters. She’d never been there at all.

He made his way to Morgan’s Books. The store was large, with lots of windows and natural light. There was a display of mysteries written by Montana’s sister-in-law. He flipped through Liz’s latest and decided to pick it up.

With the book tucked under his arm, he wandered the store. Everyone who saw him was friendly and he suddenly realized he’d been waiting to be punished. He wanted someone to tell him he was wrong, that he’d been the lowest form of bastard. Because with the blame and anger might come defensiveness—a gut reaction that might convince him he’d been right to cut off their relationship.

He rounded a corner and nearly ran into Denise Hendrix.

He came to a stop, knowing at last he had found the one person who would want to bring him to his knees. Mothers like Denise protected their children ferociously.

“Simon!” Denise smiled at him. “I haven’t seen you in a while. How are you?”

She was too friendly. “Have you talked to Montana recently?”

“Not in a couple of days. Why?”

At last, he thought almost gleefully. She would hate what he had done.