I'll tell you what's wrong , his inner voice said, coughing to life, although why you can't figure it out yourself is beyond me. Jeez, for a smart guy, you've dropped the ball this time. You're in love, you jerk.
Matt's eyes popped open and he sat up as if a giant spring were attached to his ass. In love? No, surely he couldn't be that masochistically insane.
But the words you're in love reverberated through his brain like a death march, and as much as he wanted to refute them, he couldn't. He'd made the same damn mistake all over again-falling in love with a woman he worked with-a situation that had disaster written all over it. If he'd thought indulging in a brief affair with Jilly was unwise, falling in love with her took home the Olympic gold for stupidity.
He dropped the remote and dragged his hand down his face, trying to stave off the panic nipping at him. Maybe this isn't love , his brain stated hopefully. Maybe it's just a case of severe lust gone crazy.
But as much as that would offer a great relief, his heart instantly rejected the suggestion. This wasn't just lust. He knew what mere physical attraction felt like, and what he felt for Jilly went waaaaay beyond a mere wanting to get her naked-although he couldn't deny that he wanted that too.
No, there was no doubt he loved her, damn it. He'd loved Tricia, yet what he'd felt for her paled to beige in comparison to the feelings and emotions Jilly inspired. He cared for her, wanted her-both in and out of bed-with an intensity that stunned him, Jilly was simply more important than anything else.
Looking back, he realized that he'd harbored a latent attraction to her for a long time. Over the past year, he'd enjoyed their verbal sparring matches at the office, and matching wits with her over ad campaigns. Liked that the challenge of competing with her brought out the best in his work. Admired her professionalism, even though he hadn't entirely trusted her, thanks to his experience with Tricia.
But Jilly had proven her integrity and had won not only his trust and admiration, but his heart-and he had so not been looking to give that away. Especially to someone with whom he shared the predicament that one of them was going to be the other's boss.
Well, he might not have been planning to fall in love, but fall in love he had. Now he just had to decide what the hell he was going to do about it. And while he had no clue, he did know one thing-sitting in his apartment while she was on a date with some other guy was simply not going to work. It was time to make some plans.
Jilly spent the remainder of the week doing everything in her power to stop thinking about Matt. She devoted her hours at the office to working on current projects with single-minded determination. She stayed in her cubicle, studiously avoiding the break room. On Wednesday morning, she caught several glimpses of Matt-and each time her heart performed a somersault-but then was granted a reprieve as he spent most of Wednesday and all of Thursday out of the office with clients. Unfortunately "out of sight" did not translate into "out of mind."
Instead of returning to her quiet home after work on Wednesday and Thursday, she'd dragged Kate to several more clubs. With the same determination that guided her days, she danced with bankers and stockbrokers, chatted with accountants and salesmen, laughed with lawyers and techies. And hated every single minute of it.
Plus, she tortured herself wondering what Matt was doing while she hit the clubs. Was he doing the same? Was he dancing with someone else? Touching someone else? Making love to someone else?
By the time Friday rolled around, she was ready to admit defeat. She and Kate, accompanied by Ben, were supposed to make the club rounds again after work, but after three days of that, Jilly knew she couldn't stomach another such outing. She'd tried to forget Matt by meeting someone else, but there simply wasn't anyone else she wanted to meet. Her plan to banish him from her mind and push her feelings for him aside was a spectacular failure. Damn it, the man she wanted-the only man she wanted-was Matt. And it was time she did something about it.
But what? The thought of admitting her feelings gave her the willies. Yet the thought of remaining apart from him gave her even worse willies. Surely he'd turn green and head for the hills if she blurted out, "I've fallen in love with you." Of course, there wasn't any law that said she had to admit all of her feelings. She could just admit, "I find you devastatingly attractive and want to resume our affair." Her body and hormones were certainly all for that solution. Oh, sure, you guys are all for it , her heart balked, but I'm the one who risks being flattened like a bug.
Good grief, it was true. Indulging in an affair when one party-and only one party-was in love did not bode well for the party in love. And that was her.
Before she could give the matter further thought, her phone rang with the buzz that indicated an interoffice call. She lifted the receiver, and her boss's deep voice greeted her, requesting she come to his office.
"It's regarding Jack Witherspoon and the ARC account," Adam said.
With butterflies flapping in her stomach, Jilly replaced the phone on its cradle, then hurried down the hall toward Adam's office. Adam's bland tone hadn't provided any clues as to whether he was about to impart good news or bad news. But either way, her career and life were about to change. She would either walk out of Adam's office as Matt's boss-or Matt's underling.
As she approached Adam's secretary's desk, Debra smiled. "Go right on in, Jilly. He's expecting you."
Forgoing the urge to press her hands to her jittery midsection, she knocked once, then entered. Her knees trembled a bit as she crossed the expanse of pale blue carpet, and she gratefully sank into the leather chair across from Adam.
He steepled his hands and regarded her with a grave expression that engulfed Jilly with a huge wave of foreboding.
"Well, Jilly, there's no easy way to say this, so I'm just going to say it. I'm afraid you didn't get the ARC account."
Adam's words buzzed through her brain like a swarm of angry hornets. Disappointment lodged a golf-ball size lump in her throat. Damn. She'd wanted that account so much. Had worked hard for it, and had coveted the next step in her career that winning the account would have provided-not to mention the financial security the bonus would have brought her. Yet, mixed in with her disappointment was an unmistakable surge of happiness for Matt. His campaign and ideas for ARC were excellent, and if she couldn't have the account, she was glad he'd have it.
Clearing her throat to dislodge the lump, she said, "Naturally I'm disappointed, but Matt's ideas for ARC were innovative and cutting edge. I know he'll do a great job for ARC."
Adam nodded. "Yes, I'm sure he would have-as I'm sure you would have-had Jack Witherspoon chosen either of you, which unfortunately he did not."
Jilly stared. "I beg your pardon?"
Adam spread his hands in a "what can I say?" gesture. "In spite of the weekend at the winery, and putting my two best people after him-"
"You mean pitting your two best people after him," Jilly observed archly.
Adam shot her an unrepentant grin. "I did what I thought was best to increase Maxximum's odds of winning the account. Unfortunately we didn't win."
"Have you told Matt yet?"
"No. Ladies first."
"Who did Jack decide to go with?"
"A new exec with our chief competitor, the Enterprise Agency," Adam reported, "who recently joined Enterprise from the Opus Agency in L.A. A woman named Carol Webber."
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