Susan Mallery - Sweet Talk

She’d been in New York about two weeks and was surprised at how easily she’d slipped back into her old routine. Practice every morning, lessons a couple of times a week, then meetings with Lisa. They were still putting together the fall tour and deciding which CDs she wanted to be on. The two for charity, of course, but there were other artists who had interesting ideas Claire wanted to explore.

She’d had her first doctor’s appointment the previous week and had been pronounced perfectly healthy. She was eating well, sleeping great. Life was good…or it should have been. Despite the fact that she hadn’t had a single panic attack or even a hint of one, despite Lisa acting like they were partners and actually listening, despite having everything she’d always said she wanted, she felt…wrong.

It was as if nothing would come completely into focus. No matter how she turned her head or squinted, she was missing something just out of view.

The music was great. She loved the music. She’d asked Lisa to find her somewhere to play over the summer so she could make sure she’d really chased away her demons. There was a charity concert in a little more than a week, which was exciting. But still not enough.

She paused by the newsstand. “Hi, Billy.”

The old man looked up. “It didn’t come today, Claire. I called around and found it for you, though.” He gave her an address. “Ike there is holding you a copy.”

“You’re the best.”

“I know.” He grinned. “That’s why you women can’t get enough of me.”

She hurried down three blocks and over one to the newsstand he’d suggested. After introducing herself to Ike, she took the copy of the Seattle Times he held out and gave him five dollars.

“Keep the change.”

“Oh, sure, now I know why Billy likes you so much.”

Claire laughed. “You mean it’s not my dazzling smile?”

“I’m sure that helps. Have a good day.”

“You, too.”

Claire found a Starbucks, ordered a decaf latte, then settled in the corner with the paper.

It was silly, she knew. Yet she felt compelled to find out what was happening in Seattle. As always, she read a few articles, then turned to the real estate section and looked at houses for sale.

“I’m just daydreaming,” she reminded herself. But if she were buying a house, it would be relatively close to Nicole’s without getting in the way. She’d want a big deck and maybe a view. Lots of trees and a basement. A yard for kids.

She sighed when she realized she was describing Wyatt’s house. The house she couldn’t forget, owned by the man she still loved.

Had he already moved on? Did he think of her at all? Did she haunt him the way he haunted her? Did Amy still think about her? She missed the little girl nearly as much as she missed Wyatt.

Everything was different now, she reminded herself. A few short months ago she’d been practically agoraphobic, hiding out in her apartment, terrified of everything. She’d been alone. Today she had her life back and so many people she loved. She also had a baby. She’d been lucky and blessed…so why wasn’t it enough? Why did she want the one man she couldn’t have and how was she supposed to fall out of love with him?

“Am I interrupting?”

Claire looked up and saw Lisa standing by her table. “Not at all. What are you doing here?”

“This is my neighborhood. I live over there.”

She pointed to a tall building. Claire knew her manager had moved a couple of years before, but as they didn’t socialize, she’d never been to her place. Lisa always came to her.

“You seem to be settling in,” the other woman said before sipping on her coffee.

“I’m happy to be back.” Sort of. “I’ve missed playing.”

“How was practice?”

“Good. I’m working on the pieces I’ll play for the charity concert. Nothing is new, so it’s more about refreshing my memory than anything else.”

Claire wondered if her manager felt the faint sense of awkwardness between them. Despite having known each other for years, everything was different now. They were going to have to create a new relationship as they went.

Lisa glanced at the paper. “Still missing Seattle?”

“More than I thought I would.” She touched the real estate section. “I meant what I said before. I want to buy a house there.”

“What I saw of the city was very nice. And it has to be cheaper than here. Would you keep your apartment for yourself or sublet it? I suppose you could sell it, but you’ll still be coming back to New York.”

Claire didn’t realize how she’d braced herself until she began to relax. Despite their conversations and Lisa’s promise to treat her like a partner, she’d expected her manager to protest. “I don’t want to sell it,” she said. “Or sublet it.”

“You can afford to keep it for when you’re in town.” Lisa set down her coffee. “This may shock you, but I’m glad you’re making changes. I had a lot of time to think after my first visit to Seattle. I didn’t know if you were coming back or not. What with you being my only client, I panicked. What was I going to do with myself? How would I survive?”

Claire swallowed guilt. She’d never meant to leave Lisa hanging.

“I took a long look at my life.” Lisa smiled. “I’m fifty-six. I’ve never been married. I don’t even have houseplants. My life has been my clients. You for the last sixteen years, but others before. I’ve worked hard, seen the world. Many would envy my life. It does make for excellent cocktail conversation, but I’m ready for a change.”

“You’re quitting?” Claire asked, not sure how she felt about that.

“You won’t get rid of me so easily. But I am going to be taking time off. A vacation or two. Or five. According to my accountant, I don’t have to worry too much about money, even the way I shop. I’m nowhere near ready to retire, but cutting back sounds very good.” She touched Claire’s hand. “You went looking to find yourself and you did. Now it’s my turn.”

Claire liked the sound of that. She’d always been half-afraid of Lisa and for the first time, she finally saw her as a real person.

“Would you like to get dinner tonight?”

Her manager smiled. “I would. We can celebrate the changes we’re looking forward to.”

W YATT OPENEDhis front door to see Nicole standing on his porch, leaning on her crutches.

He hadn’t seen his friend in over a week and he’d missed her. “Tell me you didn’t drive.”

“Don’t ask, don’t tell. It works for the military.”

“Nicole. You’re still recovering from surgery.”

“Did you notice it was my left knee? I drive with my right leg.” She sighed. “I don’t do it often, okay? I just wanted to see you.”

“I thought you hated me.” She’d been pretty clear on what she thought about him the last time they’d talked. And the time before.

“I thought you were a jerk. There’s a difference. That doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.”

He stepped back to let her in. As she walked past him he said, “I’ve missed you.”

She paused next to him, then turned toward him. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.

Hugging her felt good. Familiar. But it didn’t do a damn thing for him. Too bad. Nicole would have been a whole lot easier to handle than Claire.

“I’ve missed you, too,” she grumbled. “Everyone’s leaving me. Have you noticed that pattern? First Drew-”

“You threw him out.”

“Then Jesse.”

“You threw her out, too. You’re right. There is a pattern.”

“Shut up. I didn’t throw out Claire or you.”

“If you could have tossed me across the room, you would have.”