Kerry Heavens - Still Human

“I don’t care what anyone thinks, it is what it is. I’m happy.” I watch the pool for a moment, reflecting on how utterly inadequate the words ‘I’m happy’ actually are. I’m complete, alive, ecstatic, delirious, content, excited, relaxed, overwhelmed and most of all deeply in love. Is there a word for that? Happy is a piss poor excuse if that is all there is. I shrug, with all that in my life, people can think what they like. They can’t touch us. “So, what do we have planned?”

“We finish breakfast,” says Scott. “Then we hit a strip joint.” He wiggles his eyebrows.

Charlie groans and throws his head back, although I get the sense that he would tolerate it for the sake of the group. But I screw up my nose.

“I’m kidding! I’m not telling you what we have planned. Drink up.” He grins.

“Easy, it’s bad enough you are making me eat breakfast without Liv, now I’m on the clock?” I knock back the rest of my coffee, wishing secretly I could have gone to the spa.

“This is your bachelor party, suck it up. Tonight you’ll be married, this is your last stand,” Scott moans.

“I’ve been married for two weeks,” I remind him. God, if he keeps mentioning it, I’m going to kill him. I can’t wait to get this paperwork straight to shut him up.

“Whatever, come on let’s go.”

When I get back to the room its 4pm. Liv is drying her hair wearing a hotel robe and doesn’t hear me come in. I watch her from the doorway to the bathroom. She’s just beautiful. I could watch her all day. She looks up and shuts off the dryer.

“Hi, I didn’t hear you come in,” she says smiling sweetly.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” I step over to her and wrap my arms around her. We both face the mirror and look in each other’s eyes. I kiss behind her ear. “How was your day? You smell fantastic.”

“My day was very relaxing thanks. How about yours?”

“I wouldn’t say it was relaxing, but it was awesome! We went to the Speedway, took a tour and got to drive some fast cars. Then we stopped in at the Shelby HQ for a tour. Honestly, you should have seen some of the cars, Liv; it was a great day.”

“I can see you enjoyed it.” She grins and kisses me on the forehead. “You look like you did when your dad gave you that BMX when you were eight.”

I laugh, I love that she knows that much of my life. “I feel like an eight year old.” I agree. “I’d better shower and get ready.” I turn on the shower and Liv finishes her hair. Then we help each other get dressed. She straightens my tie and I zip up her dress.

“You should leave the jacket,” she says. “It’s way too hot. But here…” She turns back the cuffs of my dress shirt in wide neat folds until they are just above my elbows and then she buttons my vest. Then she steps back to appraise me. I put my hands in my pockets, self-conscious with her eyes on me.

“Do I pass?”

“Pass? You look perfect. I might make us fashionably late.” She purrs running her hands around to my back and pulling me tight.

“No you won’t, not for this, I need to get this done, it’s been driving me crazy.” I admit.

“Okay.” She laughs. “Come on then.”

I grab my wallet and shades and take her hand, lacing her fingers between mine. I stop and look at her. “You are perfect, you know that? I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

I hold the door open for her and she walks through still holding my hand tight. We stay like that, firmly connected while we knock for Max and Charlie, and then Jen and Scott. We ride in the lift and I lead her proudly through the lobby, wanting everyone to see how beautiful she is and that I’m the lucky guy she’s marrying. We don’t let go while we climb into the waiting limo and we’re still holding hands when the limo arrives at The Chapel of the Flowers.

We fill out the papers and choose Liv a small bouquet from the flower shop, then we walk around to the cute white Victorian Chapel. While we wait for a few minutes, we’re quiet as a group. I watch our friends. Following our lead, they’re all holding hands. Jen and Scott sit on a leather couch in the marble reception and Jen is speaking softly to Scott, while he strokes his thumb back and forth across the back of her hand. She giggles at his reply. It makes me happy to see them like this despite the stress they have gone through recently.

Charlie and Max are standing by the window. Max lifts their intertwined hands to his lips and kisses Charlie’s fingers. Charlie smiles shyly and smoothes Max’s collar. Max smiles. They’re so different at home than they seem separately and in moments like this, amongst friends, they can be so tender. I’m grateful for my time living with them so that I could really get to know them. I hope Liv and I are as happy after six years together.

Liv squeezes my hand. “Nervous?” she asks.

“No.” I shake my head. “Happy.” I kiss her on the cheek as she just reapplied the gloss that makes me want to get messy.

“We’re ready for you now,” says a lady from the doorway. We walk in as a group and Liv and I don’t let go of each other once until the minister asks us to place rings on each other’s fingers. Then we go right back to holding hands. It’s a simple ceremony, because I still want our wedding two weeks ago to be the real one in our memories. This is just a renewal to me.

We have some photos taken outside, it was part of the package, like the flowers. But aside from the included extras, we don’t really want all the Vegas crap added on. I chose this place because it wasn’t tacky. It’s still Vegas, but it’s nice.

“Thank you,” Liv whispers while we pose with our friends for a shot with Jen’s camera.

“Anytime.” I smile. “Mrs Morgan.”

The limo is waiting when we’re all done and we hit the town. Dinner, Chinese at Liv’s request, was amazing, thanks to Scott’s insider knowledge. I parade Liv around in her dress, showing her off like I just won the grand prize. We get a few congratulations from strangers and each one lifts me slightly higher. We wander through the casino back at the Bellagio and decide to have celebratory game or two. Then it happens. I find out something about my wife that I never knew.

My. Girl. Plays. Poker.

“What are you doing to me?” I whisper in her ear.

“What?” She looks puzzled.

“Poker? You’re killing me. Do you have any idea how hot that is? I’m in enough trouble around you already.” I shake my head.

“We play at the bar sometimes, Connie taught me.”

Can she get any more perfect? Not only that but she and Max are good. In the end, us lesser mortals give up trying and gather around them at a table. She’s something to watch. Does she go around doing stuff like learning how to play poker, just to make herself more irresistible to me? She must. I’m literally hard. I already have enough trouble with the mental image of her behind the wheel of the Shelby, now I have to have her at a poker table at the Bellagio wearing her wedding dress rolling around in my head too. I won’t get anything done!

Then she does something only a woman could do, she quits while she’s ahead and walks away $600 up.

“I have to have you right now!” I tell her as I scoop her into my arms.

Laughing, she pouts. “But I want to dance.”

I sigh. “Seriously, you’re going to be the end of me. You think I can go rub myself up against you when I already feel like this?” I settle her down and pull her tight so she can feel the extent of my predicament.

She smirks and presses in. “You’ll survive. Besides, anticipation is half the fun.”

“Jesus,” I mutter and follow her to cash in her chips.

We end up at The Bank, the club inside the Bellagio and Liv drags me straight out onto the dance floor. This is another experience I’ve yet to have with her. We danced at our wedding and a couple of times when there was live music in the bar. But we have never been to a club together. Our friends join us and it’s clear that we both have the same setup with our friends. Scott doesn’t dance and Jen loves it, so I was usually her dance partner. It seems like Max and Liv dance and Charlie doesn’t so much. Well tonight everyone makes an effort. Before long Charlie and Scott head to the bar, leaving Liv to torture me and Max to more than adequately partner Jen.