Jennifer Probst - Searching for Someday

She opened her mouth to say something, but he clicked off the line.

Kate stared at her phone for a long while, wondering if this time she had finally pushed hard enough for him to go away. Robert whined, as if sensing her distress, and pushed his nose into her palm. She sank into the crocheted blanket, petting her dog and watching her movie and telling herself she was happy with her life.

KENNEDY POKED HER HEAD into the office. A huge grin flashed her gorgeous white teeth. “Guess what?”

Kate pushed the mounds of paperwork away from her, swiveled her chair around, and stretched her legs. “What?”

“Edward and Justine are getting married!”

Kate broke into delighted laughter. “I can’t believe it. Yes, I do, I knew they were the perfect match from date one. How did you find out?”

“They’re here in my office right now. Come and see them.”

Kate got to her feet and followed Kennedy into the office. The couple sat on the white couch together, holding hands. Kate remembered the first time Justine had come in, unsure, shy, and inexperienced with dating. She’d held a small mixer to get an idea of her type and immediately sensed a connection with Edward. All it took was a simple nudge in his direction, and after the first date they’d become inseparable.

Justine caught sight of her and squealed, jumping from the couch to give her a big hug. “I’m engaged!” Laughing, she shoved the pristine round diamond out in the universal gesture of a new fiancée. Edward grinned and stood. He towered over six feet, and Justine barely topped five two, but together they fit perfectly, her reddish curly hair tucked neatly into the crook of his shoulder, his arm naturally resting at the small of her back.

“I’m so happy for you guys. The ring is gorgeous! When’s the wedding?”

“Next May. And of course, the whole staff of Kinnections is invited. It wouldn’t have happened without you.”

Edward beamed. Kate’s heart clutched with emotion, and once again she realized this was the reason it was all worth it. Bringing people together to start their lives was a heady power. Satisfaction rushed in a powerful flood. She prepared herself for the sting but moved forward to hug them both together, waiting for the release of energy to escape that always proved she’d made the perfect match.

But she felt nothing.

Kate held on a bit longer, desperate to experience the heady rush, but there wasn’t even a rustle of recognition. Were they correctly matched? She stepped back, keeping her smile in place while her heart galloped like a mad pack of Thoroughbreds. Oh, God, what if she matched them wrong? She always confirmed the connection when her clients got engaged or married. Panic nipped at her nerves, but she kept calm and engaged in light chatter about the wedding and their future plans.

By the time they left, Kate was on the verge of a full panic attack. She dropped into the matching blindingly white chair by Kennedy’s desk, mashing her knuckle against her mouth. Ken came back and dropped into the leather chair beside her. A frown marred her brow. “Are you okay? Did you get too much of a shock this time? I told you not to touch the newly engaged couples, Kate. What if you get some crazy electrocution thing that fries your brain?”

Kate lifted her gaze. “I didn’t feel anything, Ken.”

Her friend stared at her, dumbfounded. “What do you mean? Oh, my God, are you telling me they’re not a match?”

Kate dropped her face into her hands and groaned. “I d-d-d-don’t know! I don’t know what’s going on. I lost the t-t-touch. Completely. I’m working blind, but I haven’t told anyone because I keep thinking it’ll come back. Now I’m terrified it’s gone forever.”

Her body shook. Funny, how many years had she prayed for the gift to go away? She craved normalcy and hated consistently knowing if two people were meant to be committed or not. It was too much pressure, so she decided to use her talent for good, to help bring people together rather than sit helplessly by and watch them either miss each other or marry the wrong partner.

Now, she got her wish. Emptiness pulsed in her gut, a lack of something inherent within her. What was she going to do?

“Don’t panic, sweetie. We’ll figure it out.” Kate lifted her head and watched Ken turn to the cabinet behind her, take out a shot glass, and a tiny bottle of amber liquid. “Here, drink this.” She pushed the shot across the desk.

Kate sputtered. “Are these the liquor bottles from hotel minibars?”

“Yeah, I have a collection. When I get bad news, sometimes I drink one to settle my nerves. It’s good for you.”

“God, first pot with my mother and now hard liquor with you on the job. My morals are slipping faster and faster.”

“Shut up and drink.” Kate obeyed. The sting of whiskey slid down her throat and she choked back a cough. Her eyes watered. Ken nodded with approval. “Better. Liquor is truth serum, kind of like PMS. It helps you not to lie to yourself anymore. Now, I want you to tell me everything. When did you lose it?”

“I can’t remember exactly. I kept noticing I wasn’t getting any reactions from being around couples. At first, I thought it was a temporary glitch, but I got nothing from Edward and Justine. I haven’t experienced even a tingle, no matter who I come in contact with. It’s gone.”

“Probably temporarily in hiding. Have you done anything different lately? Involved with someone I don’t know about?”

“No.”

Kennedy pursed her lips in thought. “What about Slade? He came into Mugs the other night for a few. Hung out with Jane, but then he disappeared. Funny, I didn’t see you after either. Unless . . .” Her eyes widened. “Holy shit, you’re screwing around with him, aren’t you?”

Kate wrapped her arms around her chest. “No. Not really. Oh, God, I don’t want to! I mean, I want to, but he’s completely wrong for me, and he’s a client. I just want him to go away, get out of my life. The only way I can accomplish it is if I set him up with the right woman.”

Ken narrowed her gaze. “What if you’re the right woman?”

“I’m not, I swear. He only wants to sleep together and wring it out of our systems so I can then match him properly. I’d never do a one-night stand.”

She ducked her head to avoid Ken’s knowing look. “Okay, I have a few things to say to you but I need Arilyn in here. Time for an intervention.” Ken pressed the intercom button on the phone. “Hey, can you come into my office for a sec? I’m with Kate.”

“You won’t get Arilyn to bully me,” Kate said. “She’s on my side.”

“Not this time, babe.”

Arilyn floated into the room, clad in a long silvery skirt, white T-shirt, and sandals. Her hip-length hair shimmered in red gold, and she took the third seat with her usual feminine grace. “What’s the problem?”

Kennedy slid over a shot glass to Arilyn filled to the top. “Kate lost the touch. She wants to have sex with Slade, but she’s too afraid. He wants her for one night in a thwarted attempt to get over their chemistry, and she just wants to match him with another woman, thinking the whole thing will go away.”

Arilyn processed the information. Reached out and tipped the glass back, swallowing the slide of whiskey in one perfect gulp. Set the glass back down without a hitch and faced her. “You have to sleep with him, Kate.”

Kate gasped. Her calm serenity billowed around the shocking words. “What? N-n-n-no! Sleeping with him will be disastrous. If I match him, I’ll get the touch back, I know it.”

Arilyn clucked with sympathy. “Darling, I think we misinterpreted your connection with Slade. At first, I thought you were meant to find his match. But if you lost your abilities and still feel a connection to Slade, the only way to get the touch back is to sleep with Slade. Giving your body over and taking a chance. You’re fighting your natural attraction, and that’s not a good thing. Especially if it’s only about fear.”