Jillian Dodd - Hate Me

“Have you hung out with her?”

“Yeah, last night after curfew. While Riley and Ariela were getting it on at Stockton’s, we were getting it on. Guess where.” He breaks out laughing.

“Ohmigawd! You didn’t!?”

He laughs again. “Oh, but I did.”

“Riley’s going to be horrified.”

Our teacher starts talking but Dallas whispers, “You better not tell him.”

“I won’t have to. You won’t be able to keep your mouth shut about it.”

“Ha. I’ll spring it on him at the right time. I’ll hide behind you when I do, though. I don’t wanna end up like Aiden.”

“Chicken shit.” I laugh.

“So, I’m going to ask her to Winter Formal. How should I do it?”

“Ha! Maybe you should buy her a furry rug.”

Dallas’ eyes get huge. “You, my friend, are fucking brilliant.”

“I wasn’t being serious.”

“I am. I think she’d love it! She kept talking about how soft it was. Plus, only we would know what it means. She’s got a good sense of humor. I think she’d get a kick out of it.”

“And if you give it to her in front of Riley, you’re gonna get a kick out of it, too.”

Flowers, and romance.

Ceramics

Aiden walks me to ceramics class.

“Is your bowl finished?”

“Yes, but you can’t see it.”

“Why?”

“I decided to give it to you.”

His face brightens. “Really?”

I nod. “I have to touch it up today. I wanted to have it in time for your birthday but I missed class because of all the French stuff.”

He corners me at the end of the hall, his chest pressing against mine.

“That bowl is special,” he says.

“That’s why I want you to have it. Something to remember me by.”

Shit.

I didn’t mean to say that.

“Remember you by?”

“Uh, remember us.”

“There’s no way I’ll ever forget you.”

I want to say, I hope not . I want to tell him all about the stuff that went down with Vincent—how scared I was standing up to him. I want to tell him that he’s a big part of why I’m doing it. “I hope not.”

He gives me a single perfect kiss.

“Gonna be kind of hard to forget you considering I’ll be with you. Our ten year plan includes college, marriage, and at least a couple of those four kids we’re destined to have.”

I smile and roll my eyes at him. “You really think that palm reading stuff is true?”

He laughs, deep and sexy. “Maybe. I like my plan the best.”

The bell rings, so he gives me one more kiss and rushes off late for class.

I’m barely in my seat when Jake says, “All right. Winter Formal. Me and Annie. Think glitter, flowers, and romance. What can I do?”

“I still can’t believe you guys did it,” I whisper.

He whispers back, “Last night too.”

“Oh my gosh. Did everyone do it last night but me?”

Bryce breaks into a grin of his own.

Jake says to him, “You too?”

Although Bryce doesn’t answer the question, his face is one big smile.

“So, when are you and Aiden?” Jake asks.

“When we want to.”

“So, you don’t want him?”

“Yes, I do. It’s just complicated.”

“I know you did it fast with Dawson. Why is it complicated with Aiden?”

“It just is. So, how are you going to ask Annie?”

“She’s one of those fairy tale girls.”

“What do you mean?”

“She wants the fairy tale.”

“We all do, Jake. You want to make the big gesture.”

“Exactly. Would it be lame if I wore my prince costume from the play?”

“What else are you thinking?”

“I’m not sure. I wish it would snow big. It’d be fun to ask her outside, throw glitter down on her from, like, the dorm window or something. Ride up on a horse.”

“It’d be easy to set up on the stage in the auditorium. We could have glitter and fake snow float down from the sky. You could use the castle backdrop. It’s too bad we don’t hold pep rallies there.”

“Wait. That’s it. I’ll do it at the pep rally.”

“Do what?”

“Shhh,” he says, as he gets out a notebook and starts making a list.

Broke me inside.

Soccer

I get Cooper to let me leave soccer a few minutes early, sneak into his office, and call Damian.

I need to know something.

When he answers, I say, “Damian, in St. Croix you were going to tell me something.”

“Yeah.”

“Was it that B is seeing someone?”

“Yes.”

“Are they serious?”

“You know B. He doesn't really do serious. I met her in Japan.”

“What was she like?”

“She works for one of his sponsors—selling t-shirts and modeling bikinis in their tent—so she travels around with the tour. She's blonde, cute. Honestly, she reminds me of you. But . . .”

“But what?”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but she reminds me of the old you.”

“The old me?”

“She does whatever Brook tells her to do. When you guys were touring with us, when he was complaining, all that mattered to you was keeping him happy. Even if it didn’t make you happy. It wasn’t until that last night in London that you stood up to him.”

“So you don’t think it will work out if we got a second chance?”

“I’m not saying that. He’s changed too. He’s not high all the time. He’s more driven and focused. And, for god’s sake, he has a Vuitton duffel bag. I about fell out of my chair when I saw that. All I could think about was your argument about good luggage.”

“That makes me laugh, Damian.”

“Remember what I told you on beach?”

“About living now?”

“Yep. And, selfishly, I’d like you to marry Aiden, so we can be in-laws.”

“I saw you on the cover of the new Teen Beat .”

“And page twelve of People magazine.”

“Please make sure no one photographs you and Peyton together.”

“They won’t. It’s going to be a long, lonely week. Video chatting just isn’t doing it for me. Well, it sorta does it for me. Last night she was wearing a hot little nightie.”

“Do you and B talk much?”

“I talked to him on his birthday, but we’re both busy and, honestly, what we’ve always had in common is you. So, not to change the subject, but I wrote a song for Peyton.”

“The one we worked on at The Crab?”

“No, that’s not finished. This is a new one. I was thinking about singing it to her this weekend, but I don’t want her to think it’s dumb. If I play if for you, will you tell me if it’s lame?”

“Tommy says you know who your true friends are if they’ll tell you the truth.”

“And I know you will. Hang on, let me grab my guitar.”

I wait for a second, then Damian says, “I’m putting you on speaker. Here goes.”

“When the stars come out at night,

It's like when you walked in my life.

Burning so bright,

You became my light.

Oh-ooooh-ooooh-oooh,

Burning so bright.

We’ll light up the sky,

Like a meteorite.

With our hearts full of fire,

We’re pulsing inside.

Sparked by the flames

Of a burning desire.

Oh-ooooh-ooooh-oooh,

Burning so bright.

We’ll light up the sky,

Like a meteorite.

The day we said goodbye

Nearly broke me inside.

And the light won't return

Until you're in my arms, girl.

Oh-ooooh-ooooh-oooh,

Burning so bright.

We’ll light up the sky,

Like a meteorite.