Helena Hunting - Clipped Wings

He cursed and covered his nose. Whatever his plan had been, he’d failed this time. I almost smiled.

There was a moment of disappointment when it registered that it was Sarah standing in my doorway and not Hayden. But it was better this way. If he came back, I ran the risk of not being able to leave him.

“Tenley! Thank God! What the hell is going on? Chris and I were out and he got a call from—” She stopped short when she saw Trey standing behind me, holding his nose.

He pulled a handkerchief from his pocket, like we were still living in the ’50s, and dabbed under his nose. “Tenley’s leaving. She doesn’t have time to talk.”

Sarah bristled. “Who are you?”

“I’m her brother-in-law. If you don’t mind, we need to be on our way.” He thrust my purse at me.

“Where are you going? What’s this about?” Sarah asked uneasily.

When Trey made to move into the doorway, I put my hand up. “Give me a minute, please.”

“We don’t—”

“Give me a goddamn minute to deal with my life!” I yelled.

“Watch your fucking mouth,” he snapped, but he turned and strode down the hall to the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

“I don’t have a lot of time,” I told Sarah in a rushed whisper.

“Where are you going? What’s going on? Hayden called Chris, freaking out.”

“Is Chris with him?”

“He just went to Hayden’s. Can you please tell me what’s happening?”

“Trey’s subpoenaed me, and Hayden found out about Connor.”

“Oh shit,” Sarah breathed, “that’s not good.”

I nodded in agreement.

“But where are you going?”

“Back to Arden Hills. I need to take care of things, and now that Hayden knows . . .” I trailed off. “It’s better this way.”

“What? Why? Tenley, you’re not making any sense.”

“It’s not fair. I can’t be enough for him.”

“According to who? That asshole?” Sarah motioned to the closed bathroom door.

She couldn’t understand, and I wasn’t capable of explaining. “I have to deal with the estate. If I don’t, Trey’s going to contest Connor’s will.”

“So let him contest it. You don’t have to go back there. We’ll be here to help you fight it,” Sarah reasoned.

“It’s not that simple. Trey won’t stop until he gets what he wants, and in the meantime I’m stagnating. Besides, the anniversary of the crash is in less than a week. There’s a memorial service. I have to go, Sarah. I can’t escape my past, and as much as I want to be with Hayden . . . I’m no good for him. Not like this. Maybe not ever.”

The bathroom door swung open. “It’s time to go,” Trey barked, his nose no longer bleeding.

I passed TK to Sarah. “Can you take care of her? I don’t know when I’ll be back.”

“Tenley, I don’t think—”

“Please tell Hayden I’m sorry.”

I pressed my apartment key into Sarah’s palm, wishing things were different. I hugged her hard and then Trey was tugging on my arm, ushering me down the hall. When we got to his car, he corralled me into the passenger seat. Trey slid into the driver’s seat, put the car in gear, and gunned the engine.

My heart was splintering into a million pieces as we passed the backlit sign of Inked Armor. Trey turned right, carrying us away from my home and back to the prison I’d been so desperate to escape. The adrenaline drained out of me, replaced by paralyzing hopelessness. I’d lost everything I loved all over again.

HAYDEN

“What the fuck . . .” Chris trailed off as he took in the state of my living room.

“I was a little pissed off.”

The wooden coffee table was on its side, across the room. It might have gone farther, except the corner was embedded in the wall. The drafting table had fared worse. It was in pieces, the contents of Tenley’s folder strewn across the floor. I’d been staring at the mess for the past several minutes, completely unmotivated to clean it up, waiting for Chris to arrive. The chaos seemed apt, considering how I felt.

Chris stepped around the debris and dropped into the chair across from me. “How you feeling now?”

“Still pissed.”

He nodded like he understood. Which he didn’t.

“Wanna tell me what happened?”

“Tenley had a fiancé,” I said, “and he died . Less than a year ago.” What I left out was my relief at his nonexistence, because it meant he was one less threat. It was a horrible thing to be grateful for.

“Shit.” Chris let out a long exhale. “In the plane crash?”

I dipped my chin. “They were on their way to their wedding.”

“Jesus. Tenley told you that?”

Too wound up, I shot up off the couch and stepped over the crap littering the floor. I needed a drink to take the edge off. Chris followed me to the kitchen.

“Her asshole brother-in-law showed up at her door. He dropped a subpoena on her over some estate, and then he tossed that little bomb at me.” I slammed two glasses on the counter and uncapped the bottle. My hand shook as I poured. “You know what the worst part is? If that dick hadn’t stopped by, I still wouldn’t know, and then where the fuck would I be? Blissfully oblivious? A dead fiancé seems like a pretty fucking important detail to keep from me, especially when she’s clearly still involved with members of his fucking family.”

“I’m sorry, man. That’s one hell of a way to find something like that out.”

“I should have expected this. After all the shit I’ve dealt with, I finally have a good thing, and then poof. It’s fucking gone.” I slid a glass toward him and took a hefty gulp of my own.

“What do you mean it’s gone? I get that it’s hard to take, and you’re upset, but you’ll figure it out.”

I shook my head, remembering the way she had looked at me, with those vacant, dead eyes. “I’m pretty sure she broke up with me. It just felt like . . . I don’t fucking know . . . she told me to leave.”

Maybe the end was inevitable. Maybe once the tattoo was done, she would have walked away, having gotten what she needed. Like I was a temporary placeholder for the things she didn’t have anymore. Or maybe Tenley was drawn to me because I stood in direct opposition to everything and everyone she’d lost.

“What if she just didn’t know how to deal with it?” Chris reasoned.

“I don’t think so. She didn’t tell me about her fiancé because she didn’t want me to say no to the back piece.”

“What? According to who? You don’t really believe that, do you?”

“That’s what she said.” I took another sip of my drink and reached for the bottle in preparation to pour another. Chris grabbed it before I could. Whatever. I could get shitfaced after he was gone.

“Is that all she said?”

“She fed me some bullshit about not wanting me to see her differently, but she used that line before, back when she wouldn’t tell me about the crash in the first place.”

I scrubbed my face with my hands. She’d been so terrified that I wouldn’t want her once I found out how extensive her losses were. But knowing the truth hadn’t changed a damn thing. It wasn’t just the lie that got me, though. It was her refusal to be honest, to have faith that I could handle whatever she threw at me.

In spite of all that, I still wanted her. She was the one person I’d been with who got in past all the ink and steel, and when she found out what I was really like, she still wanted me.

Chris capped the bottle and put it away. “Can I ask you something without you ripping off my head?”

“No guarantees.”

He asked anyway. “What are you most pissed about, the dead fiancé or that she didn’t tell you in the first place?”