Julie Clark - The Last Flight

Dex interrupted her thoughts. “I sometimes regret getting you into this. I thought I was helping, but…” He trailed off.

Eva picked a splinter from the table and held it between her fingers, studying the wood before dropping it to the ground. “I’m happy,” she said. “I have no complaints.”

And it was mostly true. She looked at Dex, the one who had stepped into the wreckage of her life and pulled her out. It had been Wade Roberts’s idea to make drugs in the chemistry lab her junior year of college. But Eva had been the one with the skills. The one who said yes when she should have said no .

She tried hard not to think of that day in the dean’s office, of the way Wade had slipped past everything and landed back in his charmed life, throwing touchdowns and luring girls too stupid to know better into doing things they shouldn’t.

After they’d escorted her from the building, after she’d packed her bags and turned in her dorm key, panic had swept through her, deep and immobilizing. She had no one to turn to, nowhere to go. And then Dex appeared, sliding up next to her as she stood on the sidewalk outside her dorm, the same way she’d slipped alongside Brett that morning.

At the time, she only knew Dex as someone who hung around Wade and his friends, dark hair and startling gray eyes. He wasn’t a student, and Eva could never figure out how he fit in. Like her, he rarely spoke, but he watched everything.

“I heard about what happened,” he’d said. “I’m sorry.”

She looked away, ashamed at how naive she’d been. How easily Wade had manipulated her. And how he’d gotten off and she’d gotten expelled.

Dex looked over her shoulder at some unseen object and spoke. “Look, it’s a shitty situation. But I think I can help you.”

She shoved her hands into her pockets against the cool fall night. “I doubt that.”

“You have a skill that I think can benefit both of us.”

She shook her head. “What are you talking about?”

“The drugs you made were great. I know a guy who can set you up with the equipment and the supplies to keep making them. His chemist is leaving the business, and he needs someone immediately. It’s a great opportunity, if you want it. Totally safe. You make the drugs, he’ll let you keep half to sell yourself. You can make more than five thousand dollars a week.” Dex laughed, a bitter sound puffing into the air around them. “A school like this always has a need for uppers. Little pills that will get these kids through the next test, the next class, whatever.” He gestured toward a group of students passing them on their way to the next bar or party, already drunk, laughing and in love with themselves. “They’re not like you or me. They take Daddy’s money, or the donor’s money, and think nothing can touch them.”

He looked into Eva’s eyes, and she felt a flicker of hope. Dex was throwing her a lifeline, and she’d be stupid not to take it. “How?” she asked.

“I have a place near here,” he said, “with a spare room you can crash in for a while. I help you, you help me.”

“How would I be helping you?”

“You’re exactly the kind of person my boss is looking for. Smart, and off everyone’s radar.”

Eva wanted to say no, but she was broke. She had no place to live. No skills with which to get a job. She imagined herself slinging her duffel bag over her shoulder and heading down to Telegraph Avenue, positioning herself among the other panhandlers, begging for money. Or returning to St. Joseph’s, the weight of Sister Bernadette’s disappointment, Sister Catherine’s curt nod, as if she’d always known Eva would turn out like her mother.

Eva had always been a survivor. But it was easy to be fearless when you’d already lost everything. “Tell me what I have to do.”

* * *

Dex’s voice pulled her back to the present. “A bunch of us are going into the city tonight to hear this new band, Arena, play. Come with us.”

Eva shot him a sideways glance. “Pass.”

“Come on, it’ll be fun. I’ll buy you Diet Cokes all night long. You need to get out more.”

She studied the way his stubble was beginning to turn gray near his jawline. The way the ends of his hair curled up near his collar. She sometimes had to remind herself that Dex was her handler, not her friend. This was his attempt to keep an eye on her, not give her a fun night out. “I get out plenty,” she said.

“Really?” he pressed. “When? With who?”

“Whom,” she corrected.

Dex gave a soft chuckle. “Don’t distract me with a grammar lesson, Professor.” He nudged her arm. “You need a social life. You’ve been doing this long enough to know that you don’t have to hide from the world. You’re allowed to have friends.”

Eva watched a mother sitting under a tree with her son, reading a book. “I’d spend all my time trying to hide things from them. Trust me. This is easier.”

But it was also what she preferred. She never had to explain anything, or answer the get-to-know-you questions that people always asked. Where did you grow up? Where did you go to college? What do you do now?

“Is it easier, though?” Dex didn’t look convinced. “What’s that saying about work?”

“I never met a dollar I didn’t like?”

Dex grinned. “No, the one about all work and no play.”

“All work and no play makes Eva a rich girl,” she finished. When he didn’t laugh, she said, “Thanks for worrying about me. But really, I’m fine.” She pulled her coat tighter. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m meeting that new client in a half hour, and then I’m working a shift at the restaurant.”

For years, Eva had worked two shifts a week at DuPree’s, an upscale steak and seafood restaurant in downtown Berkeley. The tips were great, and it allowed Eva to pay taxes, which kept her off the IRS’s radar.

“I don’t know why you bother with the charade,” Dex said. “You don’t need the money.”

“The devil is in the details.” Eva rose from the bench. “Have fun tonight. Don’t do any drugs.”

As she walked away, Eva glanced again at the playground. A small girl was standing at the top of the slide, frozen, fear plastered across her face. As tears began to fall, her cry grew into a loud wail that sent her mother running to help her. Eva watched the woman lift the little girl from the slide and carry her back to the bench where she’d been sitting, kissing the top of her daughter’s head as she walked.

The girl’s cries echoed in Eva’s mind long after she closed her car door and drove away.

Claire

Wednesday, February 23

I wake early and let my body and mind adjust to my new surroundings. My first full day of freedom. My head feels foggy, desperate for caffeine. But when I rummage around in Eva’s kitchen, I can’t find a coffee maker or coffee of any kind, and Diet Coke is not going to cut it. My stomach gurgles, reminding me I also need more than just crackers to eat, so I go upstairs to use the bathroom and grab Eva’s purse, again tucking my hair under the NYU baseball cap.

Back downstairs, I stand in front of the mirror that hangs on the living room wall, my reflection staring back at me, blotched from a restless night of sleep. I’m still too much myself, recognizable to anyone who might be looking for me. But no one is looking . The thought slices through me, a brilliant flash of opportunity, impossible to ignore.

The street is dark and silent, the sound of my steps bouncing against the dark houses and echoing back to me, until I hit the edge of campus. On the corner is a coffee shop, lights on, a young woman moving behind the counter, making coffee and setting pastries into the display case. I watch her from the safety of the shadowed sidewalk, weighing my need for caffeine and food against the risk of someone recognizing my face from the news.