Виктория Холт - It began in Vauxhall Gardens

She feigned sleepiness while they drank their morning chocolate. "Poor darling!" said Genevra. "Last night wore you out. Never mind, ducky. Got to resign ourselves to what's what, you know."

"Yes," said Melisande, "we have to resign ourselves."

"And have you given dear Beddoes the go-by, or have you decided to take what's offered you?"

"I shall never marry Mr. Beddoes."

Clotilde smiled sagely. "I wish you all the best of luck, my dear," she said.

And they did not worry her after that. She read with them during that long morning and, when they were preparing themselves for a walk in the Park, she slipped downstairs and out of the house.

Clotilde saw her go. She stood at the door watching her meeting with Fermor; and Clotilde smiled knowingly and went back to wait for Genevra and Polly.

Neither Fermor nor Melisande spoke much during that short walk to the furnished house which he had found for her.

She was walking away from one existence to another. This was what she wanted—to be with him, not to banter and quarrel as they had always done before, but to exult in being together. It was true that a shadowy third person walked beside them. Melisande could never forget Caroline ... Caroline in her black mourning dress, with her fair ringlets over her shoulders; there was an intensity about Caroline, something which suggested a capacity for deep feeling— for love, for suffering, for tragedy.

He had taken her hand and gripped it tightly as though he feared she might run away.

"I can't believe it's true," he said, "even now." He turned his face to hers and began to sing quietly but on a note of exultation:

" 'Hark! Hark! the lark at heaven's gate sings ...' "

"Don't!" she said. "Please. I am so happy."

And she thought: Or I should be if I could forget Caroline.

"Here we are," he said.

They stood before a small house. She looked at the latticed windows, the dainty white lace curtains, the miniature garden, the iron gate and the path which led to the front door.

He opened the gate and they went through.

"You like it?" he asked.

She nodded.

"Here's the key." He held it before her. "Our key, darling." He put his arm round her and laughed aloud. He did not release her while he opened the door. He drew her into the hall. She noticed how bright and clean everything looked and she wondered how he had found such a place so quickly. There were fresh flowers on the table.

"All ready," he said. "All waiting for you." He stopped for nothing—not even to shut the door—before he lifted her off her feet.

"Fermor ..." she began.

"Put your arms about my neck and tell me you don't want to run away."

She did so. "It would be no good if I tried, would it? You wouldn't let me, would you?"

He was trying to kick the door shut, but it would not close. Indeed it was pushed open, and suddenly they were not alone in that little hall.

Two people had come in and shut the door behind them. Fermor put Melisande on her feet, and she stood still in horrified despair.

It was Wenna who spoke first. Caroline stood in silence.

"There! There! What did I tell 'ee? There they are ... caught in the act, you might say."

Fermor said angrily: "What are you doing here?" And he was addressing Caroline.

Wenna came forward; she looked like a witch in her town clothes, thought Melisande. Her hair escaped in wisps from under her black hat, and her dark clothes made her skin seem browner. There was sweat on her nose and upper lip; her cheeks were fiery red and her black eyes narrow and full of a furious hatred.

"We caught you proper," went on Wenna. "I knew what was going on. I knew what kept you away from home."

"You insolent woman!" said Fermor. "You are dismissed from my service."

"Your service! I was never in it! I serve Miss Caroline, and with her I stay. There, my queen, now you do know what he is, and I reckon if you'm wise you and me I'll go home where we belong to be, away from this place of sin and vice."

"Nothing could please me more," said Fermor coldly.

"Fermor," whispered Caroline, "how could you do this?"

"Caroline, you must see reason."

Wenna burst into loud laughter. Fermor strode to her and grasped her by the shoulder. "Will you be quiet or shall I shake the life out of you?"

"Try if you like!" said Wenna. "Kill me! Then you'll be hanged for murder. It would be worth dying to take you with me."

He threw her from him.

"Take her away, Caroline," he said. "I don't know how you could behave in this way ... following me ... spying on me. I'll not endure it."

"How like you!" said Caroline sadly. "You are caught; you are in the wrong; so you seek to turn the tables and put others in the wrong."

"You think it right then to follow your husband, to bring your insolent servant to abuse me!"

"Oh, Fermor, this has nothing to do with it. You followed her to London. You found out where she was. You ... you are in love with her, are you?"

"Yes."

"And this is to be your home?"

"It is."

"And our home? What of that? What of your life with me?"

"My dear Caroline, you have no one but yourself to blame. It is a wife's duty to look the other way when there is something she should not see."

Melisande could bear no more. She would never forget the suffering she saw on Caroline's face. She cried: "No, no. It is not so, Caroline. It is not so. It was to be ... but I shall go away. You married him, and it is my .place to go away. I did not mean to hurt you like this. I thought you would not know of it."

"You see what a good little girl she is!" sneered Wenna.

"I could never trust you," said Caroline. "I always knew you would make trouble. Everything changed when my father brought you into the house. I was happy before that."

"I will go away," said Melisande. "Caroline, I will go right away. He shall come back to you."

"When you have finished arranging my future," said Fermor in tones of cold fury, "I have something to say."

"What can you say to excuse this?" demanded Caroline.

"I had no intention of excusing it. My relation with Melisande makes no difference to our marriage. What more can you ask than that?"

Caroline laughed bitterly.

"You have lived too long in the country," he said. "You have been brought up in the narrow way of life. You have to be reasonable, my dear. You must understand and then you will see that everything can be happily settled."

Melisande looked at him and saw that the tender lover had disappeared. This was Fermor at his worst. He was hurting Caroline and he did not seem to understand, or was it that he did not care? He was hard and brutal. Perhaps everything seemed so simple to him. He had made a marriage of convenience; his family was pleased; her family was pleased. What more could be expected of him ? Melisande had despised Mr. Beddoes for wishing to make such a marriage. What of Fermor ?

Now she saw him as utterly selfish, capable only of fierce desire, never of the smallest sacrifice. Had she turned shuddering from Mr. Beddoes, a cautious and practical man, to another who was simply a brute?

She was still unawakened then ? She was still unsure. Here on the very edge of surrender she was turning aside.

Caroline swayed slightly and put out her hand to the wall. Wenna cried out: "My pet... my little queen!"

"It's all right," said Caroline, "I'm not going to faint. I won't live ... like this. I'd rather die."

"Don't talk so, my little love," soothed Wenna. " Tis tempting evil."

"So much that is evil has happened," said Caroline. "I would rather be dead than here at this moment in this house of sin."

Fermor said: "At the moment it is merely a house ... as blameless as any other."

"I can't bear it," said Caroline. "You are so cruel... so hard ... so callous ..."