Michael Ford: Jane Bites Back

“I’m having a visitor,” said Jane. “And my book seems to be number one.”

Lucy’s shrieking startled her. She was further disarranged when Lucy picked her up and spun her around, continuing to squeal joyfully. “You’re number one!” she shouted as she set Jane down. “Number freaking one!”

Jane looked at Lucy’s face. “Oh, my God,” she said. “I’m number freaking one!”

Their combined shrieking was deafening.

At seventeen minutes past five, Amtrak train number 281 pulled into the Brakeston station. Approximately two dozen passengers emerged onto the platform, among them the unmistakable figure of Kelly Littlejohn. Jane waved to him, and he greeted her with a kiss on the cheek.

“This is charming,” Kelly announced as he looked around the station. “I was expecting barns and cows and barefoot children rolling hoops.”

“Contrary to what you may have heard, there is civilization outside the island of Manhattan,” Jane said.

“I thought those were all old wives’ tales,” Kelly teased.

On the drive back to her house, Jane refrained from asking about Bryce, and Kelly didn’t mention him. But he seemed to be in better spirits, for which Jane was glad. She would have had a difficult time enjoying her newly blossomed romance with Walter if she felt Kelly would be saddened by her happiness.

“I thought tonight we would have dinner out,” she told Kelly. “With Walter and Lucy.”

“Lucy’s your assistant at the store, right?” Kelly said. “I think she’s answered the phone once or twice.”

“That’s right,” Jane confirmed.

“And is Walter her boyfriend?”

Jane hesitated. He’s going to find out anyway , she told herself.

You might as well be done with it . “No, Walter is my boyfriend,” she said.

Kelly looked surprised. “Really?” he said.

“You sound shocked,” Jane said.

“No,” Kelly said quickly. “It’s just that I never thought of you in that way.”

“In what way?” asked Jane. “As a human? As a woman?”

“Don’t take it the wrong way,” Kelly said. “It’s just that you seem so … I don’t know. Proper, I guess.”

“Proper,” Jane said. “And that precludes my having a romantic life?”

“I suppose not,” said Kelly. “Anyway, I can’t wait to meet him,” he added hastily.

Jane made a vague noise. Proper , she thought. I’ll show him proper .

Once at her house, Jane installed Kelly in the guest bedroom, which had never before been used for an actual guest. She made sure that he had enough towels, then left him to rest and get ready for dinner. She’d made a reservation for seven-thirty at a sushi restaurant she hoped would get Kelly to see the more sophisticated side of Brakeston. Walter and Kelly were to meet them there.

“Come Up and Sashimi Some Time?” Kelly said ninety minutes later, seeing the restaurant’s name. “They didn’t.”

Jane had been hoping he wouldn’t notice. “I think it’s rather clever,” she said as she opened the door to the restaurant and they walked inside. She scanned the room for Walter and Lucy and found them seated at one of the restaurant’s low tables where diners sat on the floor. She’d forgotten Walter’s fondness for authenticity, and wished she’d been a bit more specific about the table arrangements.

“Hello!” Walter said, standing up. Like Lucy, he’d removed his shoes. Jane noticed that he was wearing white athletic socks. She also saw Kelly glance down at them.

“You must be Kelly,” Walter said, gripping the editor’s hand in both of his and pumping his arm. “Jane has told me so much about you.”

“Has she?” Kelly replied as he bent to untie his shoes. “That puts you at an advantage, then.”

Walter, busy greeting Jane with a kiss, didn’t hear him, much to Jane’s relief. Removing her shoes, she sat beside Walter while Kelly took a seat on a cushion opposite Lucy.

“Hi,” Lucy said. “She’s told me a lot about you as well. But don’t worry, she’s not trying to fix us up or anything.”

Jane shot her a look, which Lucy pretended not to see. But Kelly just laughed. “I’m afraid you’d be disappointed if she were,” he said. “I’m a lousy first date.”

“I took the liberty of ordering something to start us off,” Walter told them. “I hope you like sake,” he said to Kelly.

“That depends,” Kelly said. “What kind is it?”

“My favorite is Juyondai,” Walter told him. “I almost went with Tentaka, but I think it’s a little dry for most people.”

Kelly looked at Jane. “He knows his sake,” he said. “You can keep him.”

“I had no idea,” Jane admitted. She looked at Walter. “You’re just full of surprises,” she said admiringly.

“I’ve never had sake,” Lucy announced.

“Then you’re in for a treat,” Kelly told her. He addressed Walter. “I don’t suppose they have ankimo here?”

“Not only that, they have excellent hotate.”

“Do you have any idea what they’re talking about?” Lucy asked Jane.

“None whatsoever,” she answered. “I have a feeling they’re going to do all the ordering tonight. You and I will be subjected to their every culinary whim.”

“As long as nothing is moving,” Lucy said. “Raw I can handle, but not alive.” She glanced at Jane and grimaced.

The sake arrived and Walter poured some for each of them. Kelly showed Lucy how to drink it, and Walter did the same for Jane. “Make sure you smell it,” he said. “The aroma is half the experience.”

Jane liked having him show her how to drink the sake. It was intimate in a way she hadn’t experienced in a long time. She thought about Byron teaching her how to eat crawfish. It hadn’t been nearly the same. Walter made her feel special, as if he was sharing an experience with her rather than telling her how to have one.

The waiter came and, as Jane had predicted, Walter and Kelly ordered for the table. Again Jane found herself enjoying being taken care of in that way. I suppose it’s old-fashioned of me , she thought as she listened to Walter rattle off the names of the different kinds of sushi. Then again, I am an eighteenth-century girl .

She laughed at this thought, and realized that she was getting a tiny bit tipsy. This too she enjoyed, and she didn’t object as Walter refilled her sake cup. It’s rather pleasant having a boyfriend , she thought. I don’t know why I waited so long .

When the food came, Kelly and Walter refused to tell Jane and Lucy what everything was. “Just try it,” Kelly insisted, placing various multicolored pieces on Lucy’s plate. “I’ll tell you afterward.”

“This one is my favorite,” Walter said to Jane as he selected a piece of something dark pink for her. “It’s—”

He was interrupted by the ringing of Jane’s cell phone. It took her a moment to find it in her purse, but she finally located it. Who could possibly be calling me? she wondered. Only Lucy, Walter, and Kelly even had the number, and they were all sitting right there with her.

“Hello?”

“Ms. Fairfax, this is Sal Maldonado with the fire department.” His voice was scratchy and difficult to hear clearly.

“Fire department?” Jane repeated.

“I’m afraid there’s a problem at your store,” the man said.

“Is it a fire?” Jane said, struggling to get to her feet. The others stopped talking and stared at her as she waited for the reply.

“No, not a fire. But we did get a false alarm. I think something’s wrong with your detector. I just need you to come over and open the store for me.”