Gerry Bartlett - Real Vampires Know Size Matters

“If you do, send it from the unemployment line.” I shook my head. There was no reason to take my bad mood out on Lacy. “Sorry. I know you’re kidding. Jerry knew her in Miami, thought it was ancient history. But the woman doesn’t see it that way. You know he’s been having issues with his hotel there, making trips to deal with them. It’s been her, causing trouble, trying to get his attention. Now she’s brought her game here and found out I’m the competition. She wants Jerry back and thinks running me out of business and out of town will do it. This was just her latest trick. I’m surprised she didn’t use magic.” I quit breathing. I hated that pine smell. “If she were a mere mortal, this would be a nonstarter. Unfortunately, she’s a voodoo priestess, Lacy, with some nasty tricks up her sleeve. Have you seen anyone in here who looks like she might be into that stuff?”

“Voodoo? Don’t know. How do they look? Would she be wearing a caftan and a turban, have a scary vibe? Carry around a bottle of Love Potion Number Nine?” Lacy shook her head and began mopping. “That would be too easy, Glo.”

“You’re right. All I know is that Jerry says she’s beautiful”—I made a face—“with dark skin, black hair and unusual gray green eyes.”

“Bet you loved that description.” Lacy leaned against the mop. “You know her name? I’ll watch for her credit card.”

“Good idea. Melisandra Du Monde.” I sighed. “Of course she’s beautiful. I need more info on her. I’m calling Jer right now. This mouse thing is just her latest in the war on Glory.”

“Latest? What else has she done?”

“There have been a few accidents.” I headed over to turn on the ceiling fans to air the place out and dry the floors faster. “I realize now that they were her work. Remember, I told you that big shelf in the back room fell on me?”

“You think that was voodoo?” Lacy’s eyes widened. “Crap. Maybe we should get out the holy water again.”

I smiled. “Couldn’t hurt. But that loaded shelf sure did. It weighed a ton and went over for no reason that I could see. Luckily I have good reflexes and dove under the table back there to avoid the worst of it.” I had actually broken my arm, but it had healed with a good night’s sleep and lots of synthetic blood.

“That woman’s crazy if she thinks you’ll just give up your business after a few setbacks. We’ve gone through plenty before, even been firebombed. But we reopened, better than ever. And you and Mr. Blade have gone through a lot. Yet you two have been together for hundreds of years.” Lacy finished and headed back to the storeroom. “I’d better take my to-go bag and scoot. Shift’s over. Will you be okay until the night crew gets here?”

“Sure. I expect Megan in a little while. Please get that bag out of here. Are you sure all the mice are gone?” I righted the mannequin and straightened her dress.

Lacy sniffed. “All clear. Open the doors. We’re good to go. And be careful. If she really wants Mr. Blade back, she’ll go for you harder next time.”

“I’d like to see her try. A mortal? Bring it on.” I headed for the door, surprised that most of the customers had stuck around. But we were close to Halloween and my shop had great vintage clothing and costumes. I flipped the lock.

“Come in, everyone. We’re having a sale. All furs, twenty percent off.” That got a reaction, especially since we were having a cold spell. The crowd surged inside. I couldn’t believe I had actually laughed about the crazy woman who’d sworn to get Jeremy Blade back as her lover. A voodoo priestess? Okay, maybe I could buy that. Though I’d never actually seen her, I’d smelled the evil spirits she carried with her.

But I could deal with evil. I’d even fought Lucifer and won. You’d think a mortal would be easy compared to him. Right? Wrong. First, Luc and I were both fairly reasonable people. Who knew? But the angel of darkness actually admired my spunk. Melisandra didn’t admire anything about me. She just wanted me gone. In her warped worldview, I was an annoying speed bump on her fast track to bliss with Jerry.

Obviously she thought that once I was out of the way he would realize she was the one for him. She’d tuned out when he’d told her to take a hike. He had even changed his address and name to get away from her. Mel wanted Jerry and would do anything to get him, even if it meant chaining him in a mausoleum somewhere until he felt the love. I shuddered just thinking about it.

Of course picturing Jerry as a victim was ridiculous. My guy was strong, an ancient vampire. But I was more than a little aggravated that he’d hooked up with a voodoo queen in the first place. What had he been thinking? More accurately, what had he been thinking with ? Men.

Despite his faults, I loved him. And I wasn’t about to quit seeing Jerry. Jeremiah Campbell aka Jeremy Blade and I had been through way too much lately for me to call a halt while Mel moved in on him. Instead, I was going to show her just how not scared I was after her little trick.

“Gloriana,you’ve got that look again. What are you thinking?” Jerry arrived less than an hour later. We were going to our favorite club for a little dancing, even meeting friends there. Did you expect us to keep a low profile? That would feel too much like giving in to the wicked witch.

“That I’ve got to do something about Mel.” I told him about the mouse invasion.

“I’m sorry.” He put his arm around me. “What can I do? I’ve tried to talk to her, but my seeking her out makes her happy, no matter the reason for it.”

“You sure you’ve made it clear you’re done?” I could read his mind and he knew it. But I didn’t even try. We had to trust each other now. I’d come to terms with the fact that this was the man I wanted to be with forever. Not an easy decision. But this complication from his past was ruining what should have been a special time for us. I knew I’d made some big mistakes with my choice of hookups in the past, but a wacko like this?

“I said, ‘Go away, I don’t want you.’ Is that clear enough?” He held on to my shoulders, his eyes meeting mine.

“Ouch. Now you’re making me feel sorry for the bitch.” I sighed and leaned against him. “No wonder she’s acting out.”

“I made it clear that she’s not to hurt you or your business.” Jerry rubbed my back. “She swore she’d back off.” He stared down at me. “Are you sure she’s responsible—”

“Damn it, Jerry. Are you under a spell or something? She called to gloat. And then what about this gift box?” I tapped a present I’d received the day before. A voodoo doll. Cliché much? Of course it looked like me, though she’d padded the hips until I looked deformed. It was riddled with pins. Bitch. “Did I send it to myself?”

“No, of course not. But she laughs at those things. Calls them tourist trinkets. She’s just pulling your chain. Don’t let her play mind games with you.” He pulled me close again. “Come on. Let’s go. Try to have some fun. And I won’t meet with her again. Obviously her word means nothing. I’m not sure I can think straight when I’m around her now because I’m so damned sick of her and her tricks. She infuriates me, thinking she can just force me to take her back. I’m surprised I haven’t already put an end to her.”

I stiffened and pushed back staring into his dark eyes. He meant what he said. If Jerry hadn’t been able to act on his homicidal impulses, then Mel must be working some kind of magic to keep him under control. I wasn’t about to tell Jer I thought he was being handled by a woman with superior skills. But I knew I had powers and experience with evil that he didn’t have. “That cinches it. I want a face-to-face with her.”