Robert Lubrican - A Model Mother

"My broker would pay big money to see me naked," she said. "He’s not obvious about it, but he ogles me when he thinks I’m not looking."

"Every man you meet probably does that," I said.

"I know," she said. "I don’t mind when it’s you, though. They can’t have me. You can. It might generate a little unwanted attention, but I doubt anybody will schedule an appointment with me just to drag that out and proposition me. I’ll have to be careful, but I’m always careful about being alone with a man."

"Good. I want you to be very careful," I warned.

"I don’t have to be careful with you," she said.

"We’re in bed, naked," I reminded her.

"And we’ve been here, like this, for hours! When are you going to do something about it?" she complained.

Ten minutes later I was lunging into her, shaking both her and the bed. The knowledge that this hadn’t been taken away from me made it all the sweeter. My penis, sliding deep into her, felt like it fit perfectly, like a hand into a glove.

"This is the first time we’ve done this when someone else knew about it," she panted.

"How do you feel about that?" I asked.

"Kinky?"

" Now you’re finally feeling kinky?" I panted, going in deep and rubbing her clit.

"I’ve never thought what we had was kinky!" she gasped.

"You gonna cum for your little man?" I asked, still rubbing.

"You don’t feel little now," she groaned.

I shut up then and wrenched an orgasm from her.

Right in the middle of hers, I let go and hosed her as hard as I could.

It was actually easier than I thought it would be.

I took Phil aside one day and said, "Dude, I just heard a rumor that I’m fucking Jennifer."

He just grinned.

"That has to stop!" I said, acting upset. Actually, not much acting was required. I was all jazzed up on adrenaline, worried about how this would turn out.

"Why? Be proud, man. I’m proud that Maureen let’s me do her."

"You don’t understand. She was just trying not to embarrass me."

"Who?"

I swallowed.

"My mother."

"Your mother? What’s she got to do with any of this?"

"Remember the first night you saw her, when you and Don and Jerry were together?"

"Of course," he said.

"She introduced herself as Jennifer Hart because she knew what would happen if you three found out she was Jennifer Jenkins."

"Jenkins?" His brow wrinkled. "That’s your name."

I stood there and let him work it out. His eyes got wide and his jaw sagged.

"She’s your mother?! "

"Yes, which is exactly why I’m not banging her," I hissed.

"Oh fuck, man," he said, his eyes still wild. "I told people you were."

"So it was you ," I growled.

"Well, what was I supposed to think?" he said.

"You were supposed to think my mother wasn’t posing nude in art lab," I said.

"How embarrassing," he sighed.

"Gee, why didn’t I think of that?" I yelled.

"I’m sorry!" he said. "We can fix this."

"How?"

"We just tell people what happened. It will be a hoot."

"A hoot? A hoot for who?" I barked.

"Okay, it will be rough on you for a while, but eventually people will laugh about it. This is one of those stories that doesn’t seem funny right now, but when you tell your grandkids about it, it will be hilarious."

"And it will be hilarious to everybody else right now," I growled.

"True," he said, smiling now. "Leave it to me. I’ll take care of it."

"You took care of it the first time!" I said. "That’s why I’m in this fix."

"No, you’re in this fix because your mom decided to pose naked for an art class." He blinked. "Fuck, man. I need to take art next semester."

"There won’t be a next semester for you, unless you don’t graduate with the rest of us in May."

"I could blow the final and be here next year," he said, grinning.

"You do and I’ll kick your fucking ass," I said.

He grinned wider. "That must be hard on you, being there and seeing all those people staring at her like that."

"It wasn’t easy," I admitted.

"But you stayed anyway."

"As I recall, you also got interested in the teacher."

He blinked.

"Maureen? She’s mine, dude. Hands off."

"I know that now," I said. "But I hoped I’d have a shot eventually. To do that I had to stay in the class."

"Oh," he said. "I get it."

"So … if I let you try to fix this, how would you go about it?"

Phil and Maureen thought alike. It was one reason they fit together so well, and one reason they would eventually get married.

"I’ll just laugh at you," he said.

"Gee, thanks."

"You know what I mean. I’ll start a rumor about how you have been trying to keep it a secret that your mom got a job posing nude, and that things went sideways, making people think you were her boyfriend. Like I’m Maureen’s boyfriend."

"A rumor."

"Yeah. You know how rumors spread. Give it 24 hours and nobody will think you’re banging your mom anymore."

"I’m not banging my mom!" I yelled.

"I know that now," he said, trying to mollify me. "Everybody else will too. Trust me."

The reason I let Phil unmask me is simple. Say that somehow a rumor got started that that babe Bob kept running around with was actually his mother, but that was all. If somebody then braced me about that it would go something like this:

"Hey, I heard something interesting. I heard that your cougar girlfriend is actually your mother."

"Well, she is, but she’s not my girlfriend."

"So you’re not fucking her?"

"Of course not. We were just trying to hide the fact that she’s my mom, and that she posed naked for the art class."

In my experience, about fifty percent of people would believe my denial. Another twenty-five would not, and the remainder would wonder about it.

On the other hand, if Phil described doing that, it might be presented in a whole different kind of way:

"You’ll never believe what I found out about Bob."

"Yeah? What?"

"Get this. You know that babe he’s been going out with? Jennifer? She’s actually his mother!"

"What?"

"Yes! I found out when I was reading the paper the other day and saw an ad about a real estate company. It had her picture and said her name was Jennifer Jenkins. She sells real estate!"

"No fucking way!"

"So I hit him with it. Showed him the paper and everything. I asked him what it was like to bang his own mother."

"Fuck, dude."

"You should have seen his face. I thought he was going to have a stroke. He about shit his pants."

"So he is banging his mother?"

"Fuck no, man. Don’t be ridiculous. They got all embarrassed because she decided to pose nude for that art class, and he didn’t know about it and signed up for the class. Can you imagine it? Of course he didn’t want anybody to know she was doing that, so he convinced her and Maureen to pretend her last name was Hart."

"That was stupid."

"I know. Sooner or later somebody would find out, just like I did. And by doing that, they let people think she was dating him. Everybody knows he lives with his mom at home. Well, that’s why they always left together. He was just going home to live with Mommy!"

"Fuck, that’s hilarious."

"I know!"

Presto, because Phil believes it, others will believe it, too. It’s not me defending myself, which people can suspect is for self interest. Phil has no reason to lie about it, and no agenda, other than to embarrass me. That agenda is well understood among people like that, who form tight bonds. One of the ways you form a tight bond is making fun of each other, and then not letting that bother the relationship.