P.C. Cast - Untamed

"Uh-oh," Stevie Rae said. "Uhm, Z, does Aphrodite have any affinity with earth anymore?"

"Absolutely none," I said.

"Can she fake it?"

"Absolutely not."

"She tried?"

"Yep. The green candle zaps her and flies out of her hand. She's not just minus earth, she's minus earth squared."

"That is a problem," Stevie Rae agreed.

"Yep. A problem I'm sure Neferet will somehow twist into having happened because there's something wrong with me. Or worse, something wrong with Aphrodite, Damien, and the Twins."

"Dang, that sucks. I really wish I could help." Then she brightened. "Hey! Maybe I can! What if I sneak into the ritual and hide behind Aphrodite? I'll bet if you focus on me when you call earth, and I focus on earth at the same time, the candle will light and everything will look practically normal."

I opened my mouth to say thanks but no thanks—it'd be too easy for her to get caught and then for everyone to find out about her. But then I closed my mouth. Just exactly what would be so wrong about Stevie Rae being found out? Not caught hiding and sneakily being part of a ritual, of course, but just found out . The warm, familiar feeling inside me told me I just might be flailing down the right path (for a change).

"Something like that might just work."

"Really? You want to hide me? Okey-dokey, just tell me when and where."

"What if we didn't hide you? What if we outed you instead?"

"Zoey, I love Damien and all, but I'm really not gay. I mean, I haven't had an official boyfriend in a really long time, but I still get kinda warm and tingly when I think about how cute Drew Partain is. Do you remember how he was likin' me before I got all dead and crazy?"

"Okay, first—yes. I remember that Drew liked you. Second, you're not dead and crazy anymore, so he would probably still like you—that is if he knew you were alive. Which brings me to my third point: When I said we should out you, I didn't mean as in you being gay. I meant as in you being you ." I made a little figure flutter toward the colored-in scarlet tattoos on her face that she'd carefully concealed before going out in public.

Stevie Rae gaped at me for a little while, looking seriously shocked. When she finally spoke, her voice sounded choked. "But they can't know about me."

"Why not?" I asked calmly.

"Because if they find out about me, they'll find out about the others."

"So?"

"That would be bad," she said.

"Why?"

"Zoey. Like I said before, they're not normal fledglings."

"Stevie Rae, what difference does that make?"

She blinked at me. "You don't understand. They're not normal, and I'm not normal."

I looked at her for a long time, considering what I knew—that Stevie Rae had been given back her humanity, and what I half suspected but didn't want to admit—that even though she had her humanity back, she still had dark places within herself that I couldn't understand.

I knew I had to make a decision. I either trusted her, or I didn't. And when it came right down to it, that was really an easy decision to make.

"I know you're not exactly like you used to be, but I trust you. I believe in your humanity, and I always will."

Stevie Rae looked like she might cry. "Are you sure?"

"Totally."

She drew a deep breath. "Okay, then what's your plan?"

"Well, I haven't really thought this through, but it seems to me that the vamps and fledglings should know about you and the rest of the others, especially now that another fledgling has died. We don't know everything we wish we did about you, but we are pretty sure that Neferet somehow created you guys, or at least opened some kind of weird door so you could be created, right?"

"I think so. The truth is, I still worry that the fledglings might be able to be controlled, or at least influenced by her, even though they are different now and she's been leaving us alone."

"So doesn't it make sense that it's bad that Neferet is the only adult vamp who knows about you guys? Especially if she can still have some kind of control over you? Especially now that there might be a new red fledgling getting ready to wake up?" And then another thought hit me. "Stark had a special gift. He never missed what he aimed at with his bow and arrows. I mean never."

"She would for sure want to use him," Stevie Rae said. "Before my Change, she was for sure using the others, or at least trying to." She shrugged apologetically. "I'm really sorry that I can't really remember the stuff that happened before I Changed, and the rest of the kids say their memories aren't so good around then, either. I can only guess at most of this stuff."

"Well, from what little I saw, it was obvious Neferet was up to no good."

"Not a big surprise, Z," she said.

"I know. But that brings us back to other vamps knowing about you guys. If you're out in the open, it stands to reason that Neferet would have a harder time using you for her own bizarre little take-over-the-world evil plot."

"Does she have a plot like that?"

"I dunno. Sounds like something she'd have, though."

"True," Stevie Rae said.

"So? What do you think?"

She didn't answer for a while, and I kept my mouth shut and let her think. This was a big deal. As far as either of us knew, Stevie Rae and the red fledglings were something that had never before existed. If Stark didn't die, if he woke up as a red fledgling, Stevie Rae would be the first of a new kind of vampyre, and being the first of something was a serious responsibility. I definitely knew about that.

"I think you might be right," she finally said in a voice that was barely louder than a whisper. "But I'm scared. What if the normal vamps think we're freaks?"

"You're not freaks," I said with way more conviction than I actually felt. "I'm not gonna let anything happen to you or them."

"Promise?"

"Promise. Plus, it's perfect timing. Shekinah is more powerful than Neferet, and there's a whole buttload of Sons of Erebus warriors around the school."

"How does that help me?"

"If Neferet loses her mind, they can handle her."

"Zoey, I don't want you to use this as an excuse to openly take on Neferet," Stevie Rae said, looking suddenly kinda pale.

Her words gave me a little jolt of shock. "I'm not!" I said much too loud, and then continued in a lowered voice. "I wouldn't use you like that."

"I don't mean that you set this up on purpose to get at Neferet. I just mean that I don't think it's smart for you, or any of us, to come out against her so publicly, and I don't think it matters all that much that the Sons of Erebus and Shekinah are here. There's something more going on with Neferet than just her normal craziness. I know it deep inside me. I can't remember what I know, but she's dangerous. Really, really dangerous. Something basic has changed about her, and that change is not a good thing."

"I wish you could remember what all happened to you."

Stevie Rae grimaced. "I do, too, sometimes. And then sometimes I'm really, really glad I can't. What happened to me wasn't good, Zoey."

"I know," I said solemnly.

We counted cat toys silently for a while, both lost in thoughts of death and darkness. I couldn't help thinking about how awful it had been when Stevie Rae had died in my arms—and then how nightmarish the aftermath of that had been when she was un-dead and struggling not to let her humanity slip completely away. I looked at her and saw she was chewing her lip nervously as she searched for more purple feathered toys in the box. She looked scared and young and, despite her new powers and responsibilities, way too vulnerable.

"Hey," I said softly. "It's gonna be okay. I promise. Nyx has to be all in the middle of this."

"Which means the Goddess is on our side?"