P.C. Cast - Untamed

It seemed ridiculous because I'd only known him for what was really only an instant in time, but I felt Stark's absence like it was a hole in my heart. How could that be? How could I miss him so much when I hadn't really known him? Or maybe I had known him—maybe there's something that happens between some people at a level that goes beyond time measurements and what society thinks is proper. Maybe what had happened between Stark and me in those few minutes in the field house had been enough to have our souls recognize each other.

Soul mates? Was that even possible?

When my head ached from crying and my tears finally ran out, I got wearily out of the shower. Aphrodite had a big white bathrobe hung up on the bathroom door, which I slipped on before I went out into her ritzy room. Not surprisingly, the Twins had left.

"Here, drink this." Aphrodite handed me a glass of red wine.

I shook my head. "Thanks, but I don't really like alcohol."

"Just drink it. It's more than just wine."

"Oh . . ." I took it and sipped gingerly, like I thought it might explode. And it did—all inside my body. "There's blood in it." I didn't sound accusing. She knew that I'd already known what the "more than wine" comment meant.

"It'll help you feel better," Aphrodite said. "So will this." On the end table beside the chaise longue she pointed me to was a Styrofoam to-go box opened up to show a big greasy Goldie's cheeseburger and a larger order of fries with a bottle of brown pop—fully caffeinated and sugared, waiting next to it.

I gulped the last of the blood spiked wine and, surprising myself with how starving I felt, started wolfing down the burger. "How did you know I love Goldie's?"

"Everyone loves Goldie's burgers. They're terrible for you, so I figured you needed one."

"Thanks," I said through a full mouth.

Aphrodite grimaced at me, delicately plucked a fry off my plate, and then plopped down on her bed. She let me eat for a while and then, in a voice that was uncharacteristically hesitant, she asked, "So, you kissed him before he died?"

I couldn't look at her, and the burger suddenly tasted like cardboard. "Yeah, I kissed him."

"Are you okay?"

"No," I said softly. "Something happened between us and . . ." My voice trailed away as I couldn't find the words.

"What are you going to do about him?"

I did look up at her then. "He's dead. There's nothing—" I stopped. How could I have forgotten? Of course Stark's being dead wasn't necessarily the end of things, not at this House of Night, not lately. And then I remembered the rest of it. "I told him," I said.

"About?"

"That it might not be the end for him. Before he was gone, I told him that lately fledglings have been dying and then coming back from the dead to go through a different kind of Change."

"Which means if he does come back, one of his first thoughts will be of you, and the fact that you told him that death might not be the end for him. Let's hope Neferet isn't there to hear him."

My stomach clenched, partially with hope and partially with fear. "Well, what would you have done? Let him die in your arms without saying anything to him?"

She sighed. "I don't know. Probably not. You care about him, don't you?"

"Yeah, I do. I'm not sure why. I mean, sure he is, uh I mean was a hot guy. But he told me stuff before he died and we kinda connected." I tried to remember exactly what all Stark had told me, but it was all jumbled up with kissing him and watching him bleed to death in my arms. I shivered and took a long drink of brown pop.

"So, what are you going to do about him?" she persisted.

"Aphrodite, I don't know! Am I supposed to march down to the morgue and ask the Sons of Erebus to let me in so I can sit with Stark until he maybe comes back alive?" As I said it, I realized that's exactly what I wished I could do.

"That's probably not a good idea," she said.

"We don't know what happens, how fast, or if it will at all." I paused, thinking. "Wait, you said you saw Stark in one of my death visions, right?"

"Yeah."

"So what was on his face? A blue crescent, a red crescent, or full red tattoos?"

She hesitated. "I don't know."

"How can you not know? You said you recognized him from your vision."

"I did. I remember his eyes and that sinfully hot mouth of his."

"Don't talk about him like that," I snapped.

She actually looked guilty. "Sorry, I didn't mean anything. He really got to you, didn't he?"

"Yes. He got to me. So try to remember what he looked like in your vision."

She chewed he lip. "I don't remember hardly anything. I just got a quick glimpse of him."

My heart was beating hard, and my head was dizzy from the sudden rush of hope that washed over me. "But that means he's not really dead. Or at least not all the way dead. You saw him in a vision of the future, so he has to be around in the future. He's coming back!"

"Not necessarily," she said gently. "Zoey, the future is fluid—it's always changing. I mean, I saw you die twice. Once alone because you were isolated from your friends. Well, they're back to being your moronic Three Musketeers." She paused and added, "Sorry. I know you've been through a bunch of shit tonight. I didn't mean to sound so hateful. But here's the deal. Because the nerd—I mean because you're not isolated anymore, the Zoey-being-killed-alone vision is probably null and void. See, the future changed. When I had the vision that Stark was in at that time he might have been going to live. That could be all changed now."

"But not necessarily?"

"Not necessarily," she agreed reluctantly. "But don't get your hopes up. I'm just Vision Girl, not an expert on stuff like fledglings coming back alive."

"Then what we need is an expert on this whole dead/undead thing." I tried not to sound too hopeful, but I could tell by the sad way Aphrodite looked at me that I wasn't hiding much from her.

"Yeah, well, I hate to say it, but you're right. You need to talk to Stevie Rae."

"I'll go back to my room and call her and have her meet us at Street Cats tomorrow. You think you can keep Darius busy while I talk to her?"

"Oh, please. I'll do more than keep him busy. I'll keep him totally occupied ." She purred the words.

"Ugh. Whatever. I just don't want to hear it or see it." Moving on a tide of optimism, I grabbed my brown pop.

"Not a problem there. I'll be happy to keep it private."

"Again I say ugh ." I headed to the door. "Hey, how did you get rid of the Twins tonight? Am I going to have to do damage control tomorrow?"

"Simple. I told them if they stayed that we'd be giving each other spa pedicures, and that I was first in line."

"Yeah, I see why they bolted."

Suddenly Aphrodite turned serious. "Zoey, I mean it. Don't get your hopes up about Stark. You know that even if he comes back, he might not be the same. Stevie Rae says the red fledglings are better now, and they are, but they're not normal, and neither is she."

"I know all of that, Aphrodite, but I still say Stevie Rae is fine."

"And I still say we're going to have to agree to disagree about her. I just want you to be careful. Stark's not—"

"Don't!" I put up my hand to cut off her words. "Let me have a little bit of hope. I want to believe there might be a chance for him."

Aphrodite nodded slowly. "I know you do, and that's what worries me."

"I'm too tired to talk about this anymore," I said.

"Okay, I understand. Just think about what I've said." I started to open the door, and she added, "Do you want to stay here tonight? You wouldn't be alone."

"Nah, but thanks. And I'm not really alone in a dorm full of fledglings." With my hand on the knob, I looked over my shoulder at Aphrodite. "Thanks for taking care of me. I do feel better. A lot better."