M. Marshall - The End Is Nigh

I looked out of the windscreen on to the scene before me. Shadow must have sensed my growing tension, I heard movement from the back seat, and I felt his muzzle land lightly on my shoulder.

“Shit,” I whispered into the stale air.

Wanting a better look, I opened the door and stepped out on to the tarmac. From here I could see whole sections of the bridge had crumbled away and fallen into the river below us. The riverbanks were barren. Where factories and warehouses had once bustled with life and industry, the buildings had gone. They had been destroyed completely. An entire central hub of proud British manufacturing was now completely flattened.

My lungs felt tight and my heart heavy. I had no choice but to turn around and try another way. The only other option available to me was the tunnel.

It was getting dark now the tunnel was down to my left. I walked over to the side of the carriageway to look down at the queues of empty cars blocking the entrance to Dartford tunnel. There was absolutely no chance of getting a car through it. In fact, there was no chance of me getting a car anywhere near it.

“Bugger. It’ll be quicker to walk!” If that was still possible. It could easily have flooded if the structure hadn’t been compromised by the impact of the bombings. If it wasn’t accessible, then the next crossing which might be undamaged would be over in Richmond maybe or even further west. I had to try.

I sucked it up, and without enough space to turn the car around I reversed back until I was had the room to manoeuvre. Now weaving my way back through the traffic to the slip road which would lead me to the other side of the carriageway. I held my breath as the car crawled towards the end of the queue approaching the tunnel.

“Well, that’s karma for you. Fuckers!” I laughed out loud.

I recognised the car in front of us. I recognised it because it was mine. My beautiful old red Land Rover. There was no sign of the family who had left us at the side of the road. I assumed that they must have been headed in the same direction and had taken to the road on foot too.

I jumped out of the little car and ran around to the driver’s side of the land rover. They had left it unlocked at least. Remembering the leather roll of Matt’s fishing knives which I had stashed in the driver’s side door. Grateful for the London A-Z map which had been hiding it from view. With my hopes raised, I immediately checked to see if they had discarded any of our other belongings when they had left the car.

Opening the back of the Discovery a moment of gratitude hit me when I saw that the box of Rosa’s formula was still there. Other than that cardboard container, however, the back of the car was bare. I then turned my attention to the back seat. Wedged under Rosa’s Travel cot behind the passenger seat I found a bottle of water and pulled it up out of the footwell to look under the foot passenger seat. Matt’s flare gun but other than that they had taken everything we had. Warm clothes and food we could probably find again, it might be difficult, but we would manage. As I scrabbled out backwards from the floor of the back of my car I saw a white round shape near the gear stick.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” It was Rosa’s dream sheep.

The thing that I wouldn’t get back was the family photos. Of Matt, of my parents. Then I remembered that my sister would have pictures. They, along with her, would be safe up in the Lakes. I was sure of it. It would be so good to see Kate. Once I had found Matt at his parents’ place and seen what the Bunker had to offer us perhaps we could make our way up to her.

In Rosa’s bag which I had kept with me, there was a long piece of thick cotton. We had used it as a sling when she’d been small. We needed to get to the other side of the river and now that the bridge was no longer a viable option. I would need a way of carrying her. This would have to do.

Opening the back door to let Shadow out of the car he jumped down and immediately began to walk a circle around where we had parked. His pointing ears and bushy tail reminded me so much of a police dog, but something about the way he moved made me think of him as being more athletic. He might have been a mixed breed. A German Shepherd crossed with a Labrador or something. Sniffing the air above his head his ears twitched in one direction and then another. Eventually, when he had made his full assessment, he lay down staring back at the road which we had just come by and away from the entrance of the tunnel.

I began sorting through what we had left to us and packed it into the only bags we had. Rosa’s changing bag and using one of the sleeping bags as a sack slung over my shoulder. I was able to attach one of the rolled up sleeping bags to Shadow’s back, hooking the drawstrings around his front. The cooking stove hung from one of Rosa’s bag straps. Carefully I hoisted it up onto my back. I had stuffed as many packs of formula as I could manage into the sleeping bag over my shoulder. I tucked one of the knives from the leather wrap into the side of my belt. The action made me feel uneasy. I tried to put it down to the fact that the last time I had done so, I had used it to kill a man.

Taking Rosa out of the car seat I noticed her head bobbing and her eyes were struggling to stay open. It was certainly past her bedtime now. I was confident that once she was in her sling, she would fall asleep with the rocking motion of my walking.

Rosa hated the dark, and if I was honest, I didn’t like it much either. Once we got inside the tunnel, it would be pitch black, and the torch from my mobile phone which was still safely tucked in the back pocket of my jeans would only be used in emergencies as I really needed to save the battery. I hadn’t turned it on much at all since I had charged it from the charging block. There didn’t seem to be any point with no network service running. Once I got to Matt’s parent’s place I would try again. With the phone networks down, radio waves were likely to be the best chance of any long distance communication at the moment. The radio! I had put it in the glove box of my car. I hadn’t checked, but when I went back to look it was gone.

Shadow true to his name stuck faithfully by my side as we walked through rows of empty cars down towards the entrance of the tunnel. I looked ahead. The last of the daylight fading behind us. I could see that very soon the tunnel turned into total darkness. Nausea rose up from the pit of my stomach, and with a mixture of dread and determination, I steeled myself for what might be waiting ahead.

As if calling him to me in my time of need, I recalled something my Dad used to say to us whenever we faced something unpleasant. I heard him in my head now. Like I was back there, with him crowing at us from his recliner. His gritty, yet melodic cockney tone imparting his endless pearls of wisdom.

“Lizzy darling, sometimes the only way out is through.”

MY LEFT HAND gripped at the damp stone wall along the outside of the tunnel. Shadow had moved in front of us as soon as we had walked through the entrance of the tunnel. Very soon it had gotten too dark for me to see what was ahead of us. I didn’t know if dogs could see in the dark, but he must have been able to see much better than me. Guided by the running of my hand along the wall beside me and the swish of Shadow’s tail against my outstretched hand we were making painfully slow progress.

I walked with my heart in my mouth. Every time my foot touched something I had to remind myself to hold it together. It was too dark for me to see my feet and I had no desire to find out what it was down there that I was trampling over. Shadow would stop for a moment to sniff at something and then continue going forward, usually warning me that there was going to be some obstacle in my path. The smell of death and urine mingled together in my nostrils and grew stronger the further we descended into the tunnel. The only thing keeping me from gagging was Rosa sleeping peacefully on my chest, I ducked my head so that my nose was pressed firmly into her hair and tried to focus on her.