Jane Higgins - The Bridge

‘Nik! Hey! Hey! ‘ Lanya’s face peered over the wall above me. ‘What in the holy name of God are you doing?’ She rolled over the top of the wall and dropped beside me, hit the handful of gravel out of my grip and grabbed my hand with both of hers. ‘What’re you doing?’

‘Nothing.’

‘Those are river mines. Did you know that? You did know that.’

‘It’d take more than a stone to set one off.’

‘How do you know? You have no idea.’

‘What d’you want?’

‘To stop you making a horrible mess – that would be a good beginning.’

‘Too late.’

‘Come with me! We’re going back up.’

‘No.’

‘Nik! This is no place for anyone.’ She still had hold of my hand.

‘I’m okay here.’

‘No, you’re not. You’re really not. And I’m not either. This place is for ghosts and lost souls. It’s not for us.’

‘You’re a Maker. Were. You should be used to them.’

‘In their right place. That’s what Makers are for. To help make the paths for them to go to the right place, so they don’t come wandering in places like this.’ She stood up and pulled on my hand. ‘ Please? ‘

‘You shouldn’t even be up,’ I said. ‘And you’re freezing. Do you want my coat?’

‘I want you and me back over the wall.’ She crouched down again. ‘Right now. That’s what I want.’

She was staring at me hard and gripping my hand. She had a white gauze patch across her temple that made her eyes look blacker than ever, and the beads in her hair were trembling like all the fire in her was about to burst alight.

She tried again. ‘Levkova says, please will you come back. You got a “please” out of Levkova! Come and talk to her.’

‘No.’

‘At least come away from here. Look, she gave me this.’ She handed me a scrap of paper with an address scrawled on it. ‘She said it’s a safe place to sleep tonight.’

I scrunched it up. ‘I don’t need her help.’

‘You know, if once in a while you behaved like a normal person and took the help that’s offered, you might be amazed at the result.’

‘Meaning?’

‘Meaning people would line up to help you.’

‘I don’t want help. I don’t want a listening ear, I don’t want people rallying round, I don’t want sympathy or advice or rescue.’ I pitched the paper into the river.

‘Fyffe needs you.’

‘No, she doesn’t. You’ll look after her.’

‘So, this is you running again, is it? Levkova told me – about your father. But how bad could it be? He’s your father! He’s here and not dead or disappeared. That makes you one of the lucky ones.’

When I didn’t answer, she stood up. ‘Come on! We’re going up. We could be arrested for being here. I have a father too, you know, and if I get into any more trouble he will not be happy. And my aunts will try to make him marry me off to someone safe.’ She dragged on my hand. ‘I’m not going without you.’

I let her pull me to my feet and we set off down the bank with Lanya still gripping my hand as though she thought she might lose me on the way. Back towards the bridge we found some stone steps with a locked iron gate at the top. We scrambled up and squeezed over the wall and through the wire, with only a few scratches.

On the other side Lanya leaned on the wall. She gave me this long look, like there was a lot to say and she wasn’t going to say any of it out loud. All she said was, ‘You scared me.’

‘It’d take more than a stone.’

‘You don’t know that.’

The guards on the bridge gate were watching us. ‘Let’s move,’ I said. We walked west along the wall, away from the bridge. All round us, the evening’s work was beginning: kids hauled pails of water to kitchens, men lit streetcorner fires, women hung lanterns in windows and from porches and conjured meals from scraps. Cookshops and coffeehouses were coming to life.

‘Where are you going to go?’ said Lanya.

Away, mainly. I said, ‘Don’t you have stuff you ought to be doing?’

‘I’m doing it.’

‘Being annoying? This is your job for the day?’

‘That’s right.’

‘Go and tell Levkova I don’t need a babysitter.’

‘She knows that. She only sent me to ask you to come back. The rest is my own invention. Please tell me what happened this morning?’

‘Lanya…’

‘I don’t want to help. I just want to know.’ Which made me smile. She smiled back. ‘Well?’

‘No.’

‘And you think I’m annoying. Tell me about the city, then. Oh.’ She stopped. Coming down the road towards us was Coly, the toxic little creep whose fight with Lanya had set the whole Remnant takeover in motion. And he had friends with him, three of them. Lanya swore. ‘He’s seen us.’ She dived for the first alley on offer. I followed.

We raced past houses that were boarded up and derelict, but not empty. The families squatting in them hung lanterns in their porches to stake their claims. The first dark porch we came to we ran up the steps and crammed ourselves into the shadows.

Lanya blew out a breath. ‘I thought he saw us.’ She peered into the alley; her braids fell across her shoulder and the last of the sunlight shone gold on the back of her neck. She leaned back beside me. ‘I don’t see him, but we should wait a while. I hate him! His father’s high up in Remnant. He’s just the sort of person my aunts would match me up with.’ She shuddered and looked at me. ‘Sorry. Family quarrels.’ Then she smiled. ‘You can have family quarrels now that you have a father.’ She patted my arm. ‘You’ve already had one, I think? Don’t worry – I won’t mention him again. I’m not even supposed to know about him, so I’ll just…’ She zipped thumb and finger across her lips.

I looked at her smiling face and felt her arm press on mine. I wasn’t breathing properly and my throat ached. I looked away, out towards the alley. It was quiet. Coly hadn’t followed.

Lanya said, ‘What are you going to do?’

‘I don’t know.’

She nudged me. ‘Well, think!’

I took a breath, and tried to ignore how close she was. ‘Okay,’ I said. ‘I have to find Sol. I’m not doing anything until I find him and get him home. Then I guess I could go back over the river. I’ll have to steer clear of ISIS because of… you know… him, but there’ll be no getting out of being drafted because, well, you just don’t get out of that, which means I’ll end up fighting hostiles – which is you, by the way, so…’ I shrugged, stuck.

‘So stay.’ She put a hand on my arm. ‘Stay.’

I picked up her hand and held it in my unbandaged one. ‘You’re the one who wants to go over the bridge.’

‘I was.’

‘…And fight the city. We’re at war, remember? You and me.’ Her fingers were long and black, light on my palm. Her braids fell over her eyes. The beads clacked as she shook her head. And then I couldn’t look at her because my heart was beating so loud I was sure she could hear it.

‘Nik?’

‘What?’

She put her hands on my shoulders and I bent my head and kissed her.

And she kissed me back.

She smiled. ‘Don’t tell Coly.’

‘No. Do you have a whole lot of brothers who’ll have to kill me now?’

Her smile got wider. ‘I dare you to risk it.’

I picked up one of her braids and ran it through my fingers. ‘I think I could risk that.’

We stayed a while.

Until it got dark and very cold.

Lanya said, ‘It’s late.’

‘Come on. I’ll walk you back to base.’

‘Just like that? I was busy thinking up arguments about Sol and your father to get you to come back.’

‘You’ve got a funny way of thinking up arguments.’