Paul Hardy - The Last Man on Earth Club

“What is it?” he asked.

“See what you’ve done? I’m talking to you and I’m not paying attention to the ground,” she said, and scrambled over to get ahead of him. There was a hollow in the earth after the tree root. “Right. You’re going to have to jump down a bit. It’s about half a metre.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure! Now come on, get on with it!”

Pew crouched, still nervous. But the jump was simple and he was soon safe again.

“There. Easy enough,” she said.

“Yeah,” he agreed. “Are there any more of those?”

“No. Level ground from here. All right?”

“Right.”

“Let’s get on with it then,” she said, taking his hand once more.

Katie and Iokan, meanwhile, tackled the blindfolding task rather differently. Iokan wore the blindfold, and Katie had her own way of helping.

“Nine paces forward,” she instructed.

Iokan took nine paces as Katie watched, stopping just before a low hanging branch. “Crouch forty centimetres,” she said. He crouched, just far enough to get underneath. “Advance one metre.”

“One metre it is,” he said, cheerfully, and shuffled forward under the branch.

“You are ten centimetres short of the required distance,” she said.

He took another small step forward. “Are you always this precise?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t think we’re here to be precise.”

“We are here to accomplish a task.”

“But you know the task isn’t really about walking in the woods with blindfolds?”

“That is the task we have been given.”

“We’re actually meant to learn to trust each other.”

“I do not require your trust. I only require you to follow my commands.”

He nodded. “Hm. Well, can I stand up now?”

“You may stand up now,” she said. He did so, just clear of the last leaf on the branch.

“Is this how you did things in your universe?”

“No. We were more efficient,” she replied. “Turn fifteen degrees left and advance sixteen paces.”

“If you say so,” he said. She was right, of course; the path ahead was completely safe for exactly sixteen of his paces.

Elsewhere, Liss was supposed to be leading a blindfolded Kwame along the route. He could hear water rushing along a gully. “Were we supposed to be near a river?” he asked.

“Um. Maybe,” she said.

“ Maybe? ”

“Well, we probably are…”

“Liss, please tell me you know where we are.”

“Oh, I think, um, I’m pretty sure we should be heading that way,” she said, pointing.

“Which way?” he asked.

“Whoops. Sorry,” she said.

“What do you mean, ‘whoops’?”

“Oh, I was pointing and you can’t see. It’s this way.” She pulled his arm, and tugged him along. The sound of the river grew as she led him through the forest.

“I am certain we should not be near a river,” he said.

“Um… is that what that is?” she asked.

“I know what a river sounds like.”

“I thought it sounded like a machine or something.”

He looked towards her. “Have you been leading us that way?”

“Well… I thought if there was a machine there, that would be where we would be going…”

“Unbelievable,” he said. “They showed you the whole route when we started!”

“Yeah, but when we went down that path I lost sight of it and I don’t know anything about the woods and—”

He shook his arm free of her. “I have had enough of this,” he said.

“Don’t you trust me?” she asked.

He ripped the blindfold off. “No I do not!” He turned to go and immediately put his foot on the edge of a sheer drop. They had been walking alongside a hole in the landscape where the earth had slid away, revealing roots and soil leading down to the bottom of the depression. He tottered on the edge but could not keep his balance and tumbled over, flailing back at the lip of the precipice to save himself, but it was his withered left arm that grasped for purchase and he missed wildly, falling into the hollow.

Liss grabbed his hand.

He looked up, and saw her reaching over the edge, clutching his arm, hardly even seeming to strain at the weight.

“It’s okay,” she said. “I’ve got you.”

He looked down. The drop was just enough to be dangerous.

“I’m pulling you up now. Watch out for the roots.”

She dragged him up before he could say anything, and lifted him over the lip to safety. “There you go! No harm done!”

He rested on the ground, heart still racing. “How did you… how can you be so strong…?”

“Oh, um…” she said with a smile and a shrug. “Everyone on my world is. But you’re okay. That’s the main thing!” He nodded, amazed. “Um… don’t tell anyone, though,” she said.

He looked up at her. “They are watching us. They already know.”

She looked dismayed. “Oh…”

He put up his hands to calm her. “It was my fault. I did not look where I was going. I’m sure they can see that.”

“Oh,” she said, less panicked but still worried. “Well, thanks.”

“No. Thank you ,” he said, getting back to his feet. She twitched a little embarrassed smile back at him.

“What about safety? And medical issues?” asked Kwame.

“That’s a good question,” I said.

“Yeh. What if I lose my medicine while we’re out there? And laughing boy here is still limping, how’s he going to manage it?” demanded Olivia.

“I’ll be fine by then,” said Iokan. “Anyway, I’ve gone hiking with worse injuries.”

“There will be a full medical team on site,” I said, “and if anyone gets into difficulties we can have them in a hospital within the hour. And we’ll have plenty of your medication, Olivia, so don’t worry about that. There are safety measures throughout the site, so you can’t do anything like fall off a cliff. Of course, we can’t eliminate every risk, but the chances of anything going wrong are minimal. So what do you think?”

Kwame sighed. “If you’re sure everyone will be safe,” he said.

“I’m sure,” I said. “Anyone else?”

“I’ll go,” said Pew.

“Me too. Absolutely,” said Iokan.

I looked at Katie. “Will you be joining us, Katie?”

“If you request my presence, I will join you.”

“I do request your presence.”

“Then I will join you.”

“Oh and can we sing songs round the campfire as well?” asked Liss.

Olivia groaned. “No. No chance. No way. Forget it. I’m staying here.”

“Is there a problem, Olivia?” I asked.

“It’s a stupid waste of time, that’s the problem! You think we’re all going to turn into best friends just because we go and sit in the woods for a few days? Rubbish.”

“You’ll be doing a bit more than that,” I said.

Later in the week, we took the group to one of the more challenging activities the woodland centre had to offer, and some of the most spectacular scenery. They stood on one side of a gorge with no bridge, and no route down to the churning river below. But somehow, they had to cross.

They quickly found ancient machinery housed in two stone buildings, one on either side of the path leading to the sheer drop, matched by two similar buildings on the far side of the gorge. Etched on the stone were strange markings their translation systems could not decipher. Inside, the machinery was found to be still functional, well oiled and ready to go — but none of the controls would work.

“It’s a game,” said Liss. “I’ve seen people do this kinda thing. It’s like you press buttons and solve puzzles and then it all starts working.”