Jeaniene Frost - Destined for an Early Grave

“Okay, then…let’s get down to it.”

I tried to look at him when I spoke, but I couldn’t. It wasn’t fair that seeing him was so devastating to me and yet so clearly meaningless to him.

“I’m, uh, ready to become a vampire,” I blurted.

Talk about a graceful way to broach the topic. I flicked my gaze to his for a second. Dark brown eyes met mine before I looked away.

The tension made me jumpy. I got up, ready to start pacing, when he set his glass down and his hand shot out to grab me.

I yanked back at once, but his fingers tightened. “Sit down,” he said in a quiet, steely tone.

Short of bracing my legs against his chest and pulling, I wasn’t getting my arm back. Frustrated, I flopped onto the couch. “I’m sitting, now let go of me.”

“I don’t think I will,” he replied with that same metal undertone. “I’m not hurting you, so quit glaring at me, and if you tug away even once more, I’m going to fling myself on top of you until we’re finished with this conversation.”

That stilled me. Bones never made empty threats. The thought of being pinned under him had me alarmed for several reasons, and none of those was fear.

“That’s better.” His grip loosened, but he didn’t release me. “Right then, I have some questions, and you’re going to answer them.”

Why hadn’t I insisted on discussing this over the phone? I mentally groaned.

“Ask. You’ve got me anchored. I can’t go anywhere.”

I wished he’d let go of me. I kept glancing at his hand as if I could make it disappear from my arm.

“You’re blocking me again.”

He said it casually, but his eyes narrowed. Green began to swirl in their depths, then it blazed forth to swallow the brown.

“Nice try,” I barked, “but I thought we’d already established that I have good defenses.”

Uh-oh. I’d jerked away while I said it, an instinctive reaction to him trying to pry into my mind. In a flash, I was flattened on the couch, Bones holding my wrists and tangling his legs in mine.

“Get off me,” I demanded.

Instead, his hold tightened. I became acutely aware that further thrashing would only ratchet my dress up higher. Considering the position I was in and the fact that it was already well past my knees, not wearing any underwear was about to become a real issue right away.

“Bones.” I stopped moving, trying another tactic. “Please get off of me.”

“Why do you want to become a vampire?”

Guess he wasn’t going to budge from his position. He wasn’t balancing his weight, either. He was letting all of it hold me down while flexing to counter my smallest twitch. I was having a hard time trying not to think that it had been, wow, weeks since he’d been on top of me. Furthermore, at this proximity, it was impossible to avoid his gaze.

I cleared my throat. “I’m sick of being a walking transmitter to Gregor, for one. If I’m a full vampire, Gregor gets locked out. No more shutting my eyes and plugging my ears when I travel, no more being bothered while I sleep.”

He didn’t glance away. “Is that the only reason?”

If I said yes, this conversation was over. Bones would never think that was a good enough reason. Only the truth was, even if saying it made my eyes fill with tears.

“You were right.” It was a whisper. “I did still think being a vampire was in some way evil. After all I’d seen, I was still prejudiced. What a fool, huh? You’re probably proud now that you shoved it in my face. Who could blame you?”

His fingers weren’t biting into my wrists anymore. No, they were doing something worse—stroking them with little circles. His eyes hadn’t turned all the way back to brown yet. I hoped it was just residual anger.

“No, I’m not proud for railing at you the way I did.” His voice was very low. “It took me fifteen years to come to terms with what I was after Ian turned me. Little wonder you still had mixed feelings over it.”

I hadn’t expected this. I’d steeled myself to hear a resounding agreement that yes, I had been a total ass over my discrimination. I swallowed, blinking to clear my eyes from the tears.

“Okay…so does that mean you’ll change me over?”

“Not so fast. The only reason you’ve listed for wanting to change is to thwart Gregor.”

“Do you just not want the responsibility of being my sire?” I asked, getting frustrated by the interrogation. “If so, Vlad already agreed to do it.”

Something glittered in his gaze. “I’m sure he did, but if anyone’s changing you over, it’s me. I daresay I’ve earned that. And if you think to do it behind my back, I swear right now that I’ll kill whoever sires you, no matter who he is.”

He’d kill anyone who changed you, Spade had said. Guess he was right. Damn possessive vampires.

“If you take my old prejudice out of the way, there’s no reason for me to remain part human,” I answered steadily. “As a half-breed, I’m easier to kill, and my abilities have a definite ceiling on them. As a full vampire, my potential is what I make it, not what my pulse and breathing limit it to. Plus, I can never go back to pretending to live a normal, human life. For all intents and purposes, I’m already a vampire. I just don’t have fangs yet.”

“Do you really believe that?” His voice was silky, but his gaze was rock hard.

“Yes.” No hesitation.

“Then prove it. Let me in your mind to see for myself.”

Oh hell no. No way was I about to drop my mental shields and expose myself like that. It wasn’t because I was lying about what I’d said. I was too afraid of everything else he’d see.

“Sorry, Bones, but you’ll just have to take my word for it.”

He didn’t say anything for a long moment. It was all I could do not to hold my breath.

“All right, then,” he replied at last. “I’ll do it tomorrow.”

I’d almost sighed in relief when he spoke again.

“On one condition.”

Figures. “What is it?”

“Oh, nothing too taxing. You’ll just have to share my bed tonight.”

I waited a beat, but he didn’t follow it with a punch line.

“You’re serious?” I got out.

He looked at me like I was slow. “Very.”

“Is this because I’m not wearing any underwear?”

That made him grin. “No, but it doesn’t help your cause.”

“You’re being ridiculous!” I pushed at him, but it was like shoving a brick wall. “What is this, some kind of undead dominance crap?”

“I’m testing your resolve,” he said calmly. “You refuse to let me into your mind to see if you’re just doing this because of Gregor or the ghouls. If you truly want it for your own reasons, then it would be worth my price. There’s always a price with vampires, Kitten. You know that.” He shrugged. “Or, let me in your mind to see for myself that you want this only for you.”

Strip bare either my emotions or my body. What a choice.

“I’m surprised you’d be able to clear your bedroom schedule on such short notice,” I said, hoping to piss him off into changing his mind.

His brow arched. “We all do what we must.”

I didn’t know how I’d be able to manage either option. Both would leave scars on my heart. “And the fact that I absolutely don’t want to have sex with you doesn’t matter?”

He turned my cheek until his lips brushed my throat. “Well, luv…I consider that my job to change your mind.”

His voice was filled with promise of pleasure. I couldn’t help the shiver that ran through me when he nuzzled my skin. Damn my sensitive neck. It was betraying me even as I fought to appear unmoved.

But the thought of him looking into my mind, seeing how deeply he was still buried inside my every thought, was far more frightening than anything else. Checkmate, Cat. You lose.