Devon Monk - Magic to the Bone

He caught me looking. “What are you thinking, Ms. Beckstrom?” he asked.

My stomach flipped.

“Nothing,” I lied. And we walked the rest of the way in silence.

Cody did not like the man who came to visit him. The man stood by the door that would not open. The man watched as Cody sat on the floor and rocked. Rocking was good. Rocking made Cody happy. But the man did not make him happy. The man was quiet and had not moved for a long time. And even though Cody tried not to look, he could see what was underneath the man’s skin. Something wriggled and twisted there. Something like worms, but worse. Something bad.

Cody rocked and rocked and looked at the gray floor. He could not remember how long he had been here, in the room that was just ten steps by ten steps wide. He did remember why he had been brought here. He had been bad. He had used magic wrong. He had used magic and pretended to be somebody else, somebody important and powerful and rich. And he had hurt someone.

It had been fun to be a powerful man. But it had been wrong. He had to talk to a lady in a black robe. He didn’t tell her that the man by the door had told him he would hurt his friends. He hadn’t told the lady in the black robe the other things the man by the door had made him do with magic. Didn’t tell her all the other people the man had made him pretend to be. Cody was really good at pretending to be people with magic. He was really good at keeping secrets too. Better than any of his friends at home.

The lady in the black robe had said he was guilty. So now he lived here, in this room. He missed home, and missed his friends who lived with him, and missed bus rides to the park.

He missed the sky and grass and the wind and the sun. He missed the sun the most.

But rocking made a little wind. And it made him a little warm, like sitting in sunshine. So he liked rocking. Rocking made him happy.

He rocked for a long time, but the man did not go away. Pretty soon, Cody couldn’t help himself. He peeked at the man and saw the man’s quiet outside and his twisting, angry inside. The angry thing inside the man looked back at him. It scared him and he didn’t even know what it was.

A snake, the older, smarter part of him said.

Cody smiled. He liked it when the older, smarter part of him talked because he was always right. The man was a snake inside. Snake man. Snake man. Snake man. Cody sang it inside his head and he was so happy, he sang it with his mouth too.

“Snake man, Snake man, bake a cake man.”

But that was a bad idea because the Snake man heard him. And the Snake man moved.

Cody rocked harder, faster. He rocked even though it made his back hurt and he hit his head on the wall behind him and he had to breathe with his mouth open. He rocked faster so he could get away. Get away from the Snake man who was walking now, walking toward him, walking with soft, slow steps, bending down so he could see all the way into his eyes, so close, the Snake man could bite him. The Snake man was angry. But Cody had been really good. He hadn’t told anyone about the Snake man. He had kept all the secrets.

The Snake man reached out and put his hand on Cody’s shoulder. His fingers squeezed.

Cody didn’t want to stop rocking. He liked the heat, he liked the wind. He didn’t want to stop and have to just be here, in the room that didn’t have a sky. But the Snake man’s hand made him stop rocking. It made him stop breathing hard. It made him stop everything.

Don’t look, the older, smarter part of him said.

But Cody had to look. The Snake man made him look, all the way into his snake eyes. All the way into the twisting, burning magic under his skin. And he could not look away.

“Hello, Cody. Do you remember me?”

Cody did remember him. He remembered everything about him. He nodded.

“Good.” The Snake man smiled, but only on his outside. On his inside he twisted and burned.

“You did such a good job keeping our secret. Now I have a surprise for you.”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a very small, gray kitten.

“Oh,” Cody said, happy now, happier than he ever had been his whole life. He unlocked his hands from around his knees.

Don’t, said the older, smarter part of him.

“Go ahead,” Snake man said. “She’s yours. A friend.” Snake man held the kitten out a little more and Cody touched the soft gray fur on her head.

The kitten mewed and Cody pulled away.

The Snake man’s voice got silky. “See how happy she is to meet you? She said hello. You are going to be best friends.”

“Friends?” Cody asked. He remembered his friends back home, and he missed them. Missed them maybe more than the sun. Yes, more than the sun.

“Of course she’s your friend. Your new friend. Your best friend. Do you want to hold her?”

No, said the older, smarter part of him. No. Rock. Just rock.

But Cody did want to hold her. He wanted very much to hold her. He wanted to hold her more than he wanted to rock.

He nodded. “Good boy,” the Snake man said. And then he put the kitten in Cody’s hands. The kitten mewed again.

Cody smiled and drew the kitten close to his chest. He bent his head over her to keep her warm and to keep her safe. “Hello,” Cody said. “Hello.” The kitten’s fur was softer than the bunny they had for a little while at the home. It made him happy to have a friend again.

“You did a good job keeping our secret, Cody,” the Snake man said. “I’m proud of you. And because you’ve been so good I’m going to let you keep the kitten.”

Cody smiled up at the Snake man. Maybe not all snakes were bad. Maybe Snake man wasn’t bad. “Mine. Mine now?” he asked, just to make sure.

“Yes, she is yours,” Snake man said. “But first you need to do one more thing for me. Can you do one more thing for me, Cody?”

Say no, Say no.

“No,” he said.

Snake man looked surprised. “Oh, that’s too bad. Then I have to take her away.”

Cody tried to hold on to the kitten, but the Snake man was fast. He snatched up the kitten and took her away.

“No!” he cried.

The Snake man stood. He was tall, and powerful, and angry. He held the kitten out by the back of her neck. Kitten twisted and mewed and shook. “That was a bad answer, Cody,” Snake man said. “You’ve done a very bad thing. And since you don’t want a friend, I’ll have to kill her now.”

The Snake man put both hands around the kitten, one all the way over her head. He twisted his hands.

“No!” Cody jumped up and grabbed for Kitten. He was almost as tall as Snake man, but Snake man was faster. Much faster. He pulled the kitten out of Cody’s reach.

“If you want Kitten to live, you must do magic for me. You must pretend to be someone else again.”

No, no, no, no!

The kitten gave out one small mew, muffled by the Snake man’s hand.

“Please,” Cody said. “Don’t hurt her. Please?”

“Do magic for me.”

No!

Somewhere inside the Snake man’s hands, the kitten mewed, but she did not move. She wasn’t fighting anymore. She was doing what Snake man wanted her to do.

“You can have a friend, Cody. She’s right here. All you have to do is say yes.”

No!

“Yes,” Cody whispered.

“Good, Cody, good,” Snake man said. “I’m proud of you. You did a good thing.” He took his hand off the kitten’s head, but still held her tightly in one fist. Kitten shook her head and sneezed, and Cody might have laughed about that, but he was too sad. He knew Snake man wanted him to do a bad thing. He knew it would be another secret he had to keep. He didn’t want to keep any more secrets. He didn’t want to be bad again.