Kristie Cook - Promise

"Solomon, she's too young!" Mom interrupted. "At least allow her to finish college."

Solomon grunted.

"It is only a couple of years, darling," Rina soothed, reaching back to pat his hand. "That is nothing to us."

I squirmed in discomfort as they discussed plans for my future— my marriage, my child—as if I weren't there. Though nearly everything about the Amadis was still as murky as the Everglades swamps, I saw a few things with perfect clarity. A future I didn't like flashed before me, showing me as a puppet. I decided I better speak up now or I would be handing them the strings forever.

"Tristan and I will know when it's time to take each next step. We will determine that," I said clearly and firmly. "On our terms."

Everyone stared at me in mild shock. Except Tristan. He grinned widely. A smile eventually spread across Rina's face, too.

" Yes, you will be magnificent ," she said in my head.

And that was it. We said our good-byes, then Solomon hooked Rina's arm in his and they disappeared into the night—early morning, actually—returning to wherever they came from. I wondered where that was and I wondered if they were mates. Despite how much I'd learned tonight, I still knew so little.

"Stay together tonight?" Tristan asked me when we had a moment alone. I nodded. "Here or my place?"

I felt physically and emotionally exhausted and didn't want to go anywhere, but I remembered my broken bed and frowned. "Your place, definitely."

As we pulled out of the driveway, I watched Stefan and Mom on the front porch as they turned to go inside, still discussing plans for my protection, I assumed. Stefan stroked his square jaw and chin thoughtfully. In a strangely familiar way. In a matter of two seconds, it all came back to me.

Sheffie!

Sheffie who took me to the park, to the zoo and out for ice cream. Sheffie who drank my invisible tea, sang lullabies at bedtime and made the best French toast in the world. Sheffie who took me for a carousel ride when it was closed and somehow made it go, playing lively carnival music, my horse sliding up and down as I squealed with delight and he stood next to me, making sure I didn't fall off. Sheffie who loved me. Loved me like a dad. Or so I'd thought.

And then I remembered I had seen Mom cry before. Once.

"Stop! Tristan, stop!" I smacked his shoulder. He looked back at me. "Stop! Now!"

He stopped and cut the engine at the bottom of the driveway. Somehow I managed to scramble off the bike and nearly run up the front walk to the house. Mom and Stefan stopped just inside the door and turned toward me.

"You son of a bitch!" I screamed. And before I knew what I was doing, my hand slapped Stefan's face with a loud smack ! "That's for what you did to my mom. And this one's for me!"

I raised and swung my hand again, but it was caught in mid-air.

"Alexis, what the hell?" Tristan asked with bewilderment.

I stared at Stefan as my chest rose and fell with anger.

"You want to know why I had such trust issues?" I fumed through burning tears. "You want to know what started it all? Ask him!"

"Stefan?" Tristan still sounded confused.

"Yes! But he was Sheffie to me. And he was the first one to leave and break my heart."

And I knew it was true when Stefan lowered his head and sighed sadly. That's why he couldn't look me in the eye all night. That's why I could feel his guilty conscience.

"You left us! You left me ! You were the closest thing I ever had to a dad and you left me!"

"Lexi, my love," Tristan pulled me into his arms and I cried against his chest. "I think you're confused…."

"No. No, she's not," Stefan said, his voice full of quiet grief. "She remembers right."

I looked at him through my tears and remembered him clearly now, although I had only been four or five years old the last time I saw him.

"You were the only boyfriend who cared about me. Who really cared . Not just because I was around and fun to play with. Not just to impress Mom. Or so I thought. I thought you really loved me."

"Alexis, I did love you," Stefan said quietly. "I still do."

"But you left ! And you never came back!"

"I am so sorry." And I could hear it in his voice. My anger broke and all I felt was the sadness renewed.

"Honey, Stefan was never really a boyfriend. He was our protector then," Mom said. "Eventually, he had to move on to a new assignment. He had to go."

"But, you cried when he left, too."

"I cried for you, honey," she said. "Your little heart broke and you just couldn't understand."

"I deeply regretted doing that to you," Stefan said. "As you got older, I hoped you had just forgotten."

I shook my head. "I didn't forget. I didn't remember your face, but I never forgot how much I loved you and how much I cried when you left. I thought I did something wrong."

"It was nothing you did. I didn't have a choice and when your mom told me how hurt you were, we decided it was best for me to just stay away. I couldn't be reliable enough for you." Stefan held his arms open. "Please forgive me?"

I could see sincerest remorse in his dark eyes. And I somehow knew he'd never meant to hurt me. Maybe it was the Amadis goodness emanating from him. I don't know how or why—perhaps the passage of time to heal the wounds or the fact I'd just survived the worst loss, if only for a couple weeks, I'd ever experienced—but I couldn't help but forgive him immediately. I left Tristan's arms and fell into Stefan's.

"Sheffie," I cried into his chest.

"Ali-oop," he murmured, stroking my hair. I'd forgotten his nickname for me and giggled through my tears. "I am so sorry."

I nodded against his chest. "I know now. I'm sorry I slapped you."

"I deserved it." He held me for another moment then gently pushed me back. "I think you need to get some rest now."

I wiped the tears on my cheeks, took a deep breath and stepped back to Tristan. He wrapped his arm around my waist and I sagged against him. I'd spent every bit of emotional energy I had and that last bit broke me. I was absolutely exhausted. I didn't even know how we made it back to Tristan's house without me falling off the back of the bike.

"You're amazing," Tristan said as he half-carried me up the stairs to his room. My head lolled against his side, my eyelids drooping.

"Huh?" I asked through my grogginess.

"You're so forgiving. I think I suffered more for what Stefan did to you than he did."

I cupped my hand around his face. "I'm sorry you had to deal with my issues. You did take the brunt of it all and I love you for that. But I believe Stefan did suffer. I could see it in his eyes. Life's too short to hold grudges against people you love."

Tristan chuckled and even through the exhaustion, I understood.

"Even for us, my sweet Tristan. Love is just too precious."

"You are such a tease," Tristan admonished the next morning.

I widened my eyes and looked at him innocently as he pulled a pair of jeans out of a box and hung them up. "What? I'm just looking for some clothes."

"In my closet?"

I smiled impishly. I'd just stepped out of the shower and had a towel wrapped around me, water drops beaded on my skin and my hair still dripped. I had panties on already, but he didn't know that. I was being a tease.

"Maybe I like wearing your shirts." I found a plain white t-shirt and pulled it on with one arm while holding my towel with the other. As I walked out of the closet, I let the towel fall in the doorway as the t-shirt slid slowly down to my thighs. I could feel his eyes on me as I left and I grinned to myself.

I went back to the bathroom to brush my wet hair. It soaked through the front of the white shirt, making it transparent, and I debated how mean I wanted to be. But when I looked up into the mirror, I saw Tristan behind me in the doorway, watching me with his arms crossed.