P. Hoover - Solstice

I can tell Shayne’s pensive, and so am I. He’s got his lips pressed together, and he doesn’t even skate when we cross the river. Instead, we walk hand in hand in silence. And when we finally reach the winter wonderland on the other shore, I’ve decided it’s time to head home. Shayne must realize he’s been quiet, so he starts to make chit chat, but my mind drifts to Chloe, back above ground, at the side of the creek bed.

“I need to leave.”

Shayne turns to me, and his eyes soften. I see the sadness filling them now.

“Please don’t go.” He brushes my arm. “Not yet.”

And I think if he asks me right now, I will stay with him forever.

“Please?”

I nod, and he pulls me in and holds me. My body presses up against his on the edge of the River Cocytus, under the icicle trees. His muscles are hard, and they mesh into mine. I feel the beating of his heart in his neck; my forehead is so close to it. His skin is warm enough to melt every bit of ice around us; I let the heat soak into my body.

He kisses the top of my head, and a chill spreads down me, having nothing to do with the frozen river we’ve just crossed. He lets go of me and backs up so I can see his face. His soft, gorgeous, dark face. A face of mysteries. A face of secrets. I want to know his secrets. Want to share them with him.

“I really like the Underworld,” I say.

“I really like you,” he says.

He smiles, and I want to sink back into his warm arms. But he’s one step ahead of me. He pulls me to the snowy ground, letting my coat fan out below me, and moves to me. His lips find mine. My arms snake around him, and I let his whole weight fall on me.

His kisses are hard and fierce, and his hot breath explores my mouth. I gasp for air when I can between kisses, but don’t twist away because if it’s a dream, I don’t want to wake up. His hands move to my hair, breaking the ponytail holder with a snap, and he runs his hands through the tangles which have accumulated. Against me, I feel him, and I want him to be a part of me more than anything else.

His hands travel down my sides; I don’t want to stop anything with Shayne. I lift his shirt and let my hands move over his skin. Each touch is electric, and his kisses taste of singed sweetness. Being with him here in our winter paradise is more perfect than the Elysian Fields, but Shayne stops way too soon and rolls off me. I try to move back to him, but he pushes me away and jumps to his feet, grabbing one of the supply chests near the dock and throwing it. It smashes into the rock wall, and the pieces scatter everywhere. And then thunder rumbles around us.

I stand up and try to force away the yearning which is pulsing so hard through my body it hurts. His back is to me, and I’m not sure if I should go over next to him or keep the distance between us. “Is it something I did?”

Shayne whips around, and his eyes are flashing. The red beats and throbs inside, and the brown is so dark it looks like ink. His teeth are clenched, and for a second, it seems he wants to kill me.

“Gods no! You could never do anything wrong.”

I’m relieved and baffled all at the same time. I didn’t do anything, but he also doesn’t want to be with me. “Then why did you stop?”

Shayne closes his eyes, and tries to get his anger under control. His hands are balled in fists, but when he reopens his eyes, he relaxes his hands, and the red flashes settle down. “Because it would only confuse you more.”

It’s like his answer only throws more uncertainty my way. “I’m not confused about anything.” Except every single event in the last week.

Shayne shakes his head and whistles, and soon Cerberus comes bounding out of the dark tunnel ahead. He runs to Shayne and stops at his feet. “The time isn’t right.”

The time seems right to me. But it stings, and even though he denies it, I’m sure it’s something I’ve done.

Shayne smiles and reaches down to scratch Cerberus’s left head. Its ears go back, and its eyes close as Cerberus leans forward. “I have to be patient; but it’s just so hard.” Our eyes hold each other until finally he breaks the contact. “I do think you’re right about one thing.”

Finally. “What?”

“It’s time for you to go. At least for today.”

I nod, though at this point, I don’t really want to leave—ever. But Chloe’s waiting for me back at the creek. “Can I come back sometime?”

“Piper, you can come back any time you want.”

“How? Do you have a FON?” I have a hard time imagining that the city issued Shayne his own Functional Operating Node.

Shayne laughs and walks toward me, taking my hand. We start walking back down a tunnel, turning a few times, until we come out of the rock wall, and I see the banks of the River Acheron ahead of us. A boat approaches—Charon, coming to get us.

“No, no FON. But just call me. I’ll be around.” He gives my hand a quick squeeze.

I find the thought that Shayne will be around both comforting and alarming. He can’t possibly be around every second of every day.

“Always?”

“No, not always,” he says. “But enough.”

I relax. The last thing I want is to move from an overprotective mom to an overprotective boyfriend. And I don’t know if this thought means that Shayne is my boyfriend.

Our trip back with Charon is quiet. I sit in the front wrapped in Shayne’s strong arms while Charon guides us across the bubbling river of sorrow. I hear the voices as we move through the water, see the monsters feasting on sadness, but I ignore them, instead thinking only of Chloe waiting for me and Shayne’s burning warmth next to me and his odd but intense burst of anger back on the shore.

Charon smiles when I get off the boat, and for a moment, I want to reach out and give him a hug. He holds his feet firmly in one place, though, and since I don’t see an opening, I brush the weird urge away. I chalk it up to the fact that I’ve just been in Hell for the day and I think I’m in love with Shayne, who is actually Hades, Lord of the Underworld. Not the most normal day, though certainly it’s been the most memorable.

Shayne walks me away from the shore, and I recognize the place where we first arrived.

“Did you decide?” he asks.

Paradise will be waiting for Chloe later. Her time isn’t now. There has to be a reason Tanni warned me about it. “I want Chloe to live.” And with those words, I am officially the most selfish person in the world.

Shayne nods. “And I stand by my word. It’s your choice.”

I move to hug him, but he puts up his hand. “Are you sure?”

“Of course,” I say. Selfish or not, it is my decision.

“Okay, then she lives.”

The words sound almost like a death sentence.

“Are you ready?” he asks.

I look up, but all I see is packed dirt and rock hovering above us. “How do we get through?”

“Just you this time.”

I look away from the hard ceiling, back to his face. “You aren’t coming with me?” And all of a sudden, I don’t want to leave, which is funny considering I was just worried about him being overprotective.

“Chloe needs you. Not me,” he says.

“You’ll be at school?”

Shayne smiles, and it lights the dark cavern. At least for me. “School. The only good part of it is seeing you.”

“You haven’t been there all year, have you?” Maybe it’s obvious by now, but I want the confirmation that I’m not crazy.

Shayne shakes his head. “Nope. Only a week. But you’re the only one who knows that. I had to enroll so I could keep an eye on Reese.”