Joe Abercrombie: Best Served Cold

“I feel confident that we could lend political assistance also. Good neighbours, you know, are the surest shelter in a storm.” She did not like his choice of words, so soon after she’d used them herself, but he went smoothly on. “Valint and Balk have deep roots in the Union. Extremely deep. I do not doubt we could arrange an alliance between you and their High King.”

“An alliance?” She didn’t mention that she’d very nearly consummated an alliance of a different kind with the King of the Union, in a gaudy bedchamber at Cardotti’s House of Leisure. “Even though he’s married to Orso’s daughter? Even though his sons may have a claim on my dukedom? A better claim than mine, many would say.”

“We strive always to work with what we find, before we strive to change it. For the right leader, with the right backing, Styria is there for the taking. Valint and Balk wish to stand with the victor.”

“Even though I broke into your offices in Westport and murdered your man Mauthis?”

“Your success in that venture only demonstrates your great resourcefulness.” Sulfur shrugged. “Men are easily replaced. The world is full of them.”

She tapped thoughtfully at the top of her desk. “Strange that you should come here, making such an offer.”

“How so?”

“Only yesterday I had a very similar visit from a representative of the Prophet of Gurkhul, offering his… backing.”

That gave him a moment’s pause. “Whom did he send?”

“A woman called Ishri.”

Sulfur’s eyes narrowed by the smallest fraction. “You cannot trust her.”

“But I can trust you, because you smile so sweetly? So did my brother, and he lied with every breath.”

Sulfur only smiled the more. “The truth, then. Perhaps you are aware that the Prophet and my employers stand on opposite sides of a great struggle.”

“I’ve heard it mentioned.”

“Believe me when I say you would not wish to find yourself on the wrong side.”

“I’m not sure I wish to find myself on either side.” She slowly settled back into her chair, faking comfort when she felt like a fraud at a stolen desk. “But never fear. I told Ishri the price of her support was too high. Tell me, Master Sulfur, what price will Valint and Balk ask for their help?”

“No more than what is fair. Interest on their loans. Preference in their business dealings and those of their partners and associates. That you refuse to deal with the Gurkish and their allies. That you act, when my employers request, in concert with the forces of the Union-”

“Only whenever your employers request?”

“Perhaps once or twice in your lifetime.”

“Or perhaps more, as you see fit. You want me to sell Talins to you and thank you for the privilege. You want me to kneel at your vault door and beg for favours.”

“You over-dramatise-”

“I do not kneel, Master Sulfur.”

It was his turn to pause at her choice of words. But only for a moment. “May I be candid, your Excellency?”

“I’d like to see you try.”

“You are new to the ways of power. Everyone must kneel to someone. If you are too proud to take our hand of friendship, others will.”

Monza snorted, though behind her scorn her heart was pounding. “Good luck, to them and to you. May your hand of friendship bring them happier results than it brought to Orso. I believe Ishri was going to start looking for friends in Puranti. Perhaps you should go to Ospria first, or Sipani, or Affoia. I’m sure you’ll find someone in Styria to take your money. We’re famous for our whores.”

Sulfur’s grin twitched even wider. “Talins owes great debts to my employers.”

“Orso owes great debts to them, you can ask him for your money back. I believe he was thrown out with the kitchen waste, but you should find him if you dig, down there at the bottom of the cliff. I’ll happily lend you a trowel for the purpose.”

Still he smiled, but there was no missing his threat. “It would be a shame if you left us no choice but to yield to the rage of Queen Terez, and let her seek vengeance for her father’s death.”

“Ah, vengeance, vengeance.” Monza gave him a smile of her own. “I don’t startle at shadows, Master Sulfur. I’m sure Terez talks a grand war, but the Union is spread thin. They have enemies both North and South and inside their borders too. If your High King’s wife wants my little chair, well, she can come and fight me for it. But I rather suspect his August Majesty has other worries.”

“I do not think you realise the dangers that fill the dark corners of the world.” There was no good humour in Sulfur’s huge grin now. “Why, even as we speak you sit here… alone.” It had become a hungry leer, filled with sharp, white teeth. “So very, very fragile.”

She blinked, as if baffled. “Alone?”

“You are mistaken.” Shenkt had walked up in utter silence until he stood, unobserved, right at Sulfur’s shoulder, close as his shadow. Valint and Balk’s representative spun about, took a shocked step back and stood frozen, as though he’d turned to see the dead breathing in his ear.

“You,” he whispered.

“Yes.”

“I thought-”

“No.”

“Then… this is your doing?”

“I have had my hand in it.” Shenkt shrugged. “But chaos is the natural state of things, for men pull always in their own directions. It is those who want the world to march all the same way that give themselves the challenge.”

The different-coloured eyes swivelled to Monza, and back. “Our master will not-”

“ Your master,” said Shenkt. “I have none, anymore, remember? I told him I was done. I always give a warning when I can, and here is yours. Get you gone. Return, you will not find me in a warning mood. Go back, and tell him you serve. Tell him I used to serve. We do not kneel.”

Sulfur slowly nodded, then his mouth slipped back into the smirk he wore when he came in. “Die standing, then.” He turned to Monza, gave his graceful bow once more. “You will hear from us.” And he strutted easily from the room.

Shenkt raised his brows as Sulfur disappeared from sight. “He took it well.”

She didn’t feel like laughing. “There’s a lot you’re not telling me.”

“Yes.”

“Who are you, really?”

“I have been many things. An apprentice. An ambassador. A solver of stubborn problems, and a maker of them. Today, it seems, I am a man who settles other people’s scores.”

“Cryptic shit. If I want riddles I can visit a fortune-teller.”

“You’re a grand duchess. You could probably get one to come to you.”

She nodded towards the doors. “You knew him.”

“I did.”

“You had the same master?”

“Once. Long ago.”

“You worked for a bank?”

He gave his empty smile. “In a manner of speaking. They do far more than count coins.”

“So I’m beginning to see. And now?”

“Now, I do not kneel.”

“Why have you helped me?”

“Because they made Orso, and I break whatever they have made.”

“Revenge,” she murmured.

“Not the best of motives, but good outcomes can flow from evil motives, still.”

“And the other way about.”

“Of course. You brought the Duke of Talins all his victories, and so I had been watching you, thinking to weaken him by killing you. As it happened, Orso tried to do it himself. So I mended you instead, thinking to persuade you to kill Orso and take his place. But I underestimated your determination, and you slipped away. As it happened, you set about trying to kill Orso…”

She shifted, somewhat uncomfortably, in her ex-employer’s chair. “And took his place.”

“Why dam a river that already flows your way? Let us say we have helped each other.” And he gave his skull’s grin one more time. “We all of us have our scores to settle.”