Chris Wooding: The Fade

'You want something,' Casta stated. I guessed she was looking at me, but it was hard to tell as she had no pupils or irises.

That was my cue. 'I'm in trouble,' I said, and my eyes filled with tears that were not entirely faked.

Liss melted. She flung her arms around me – no easy task with the obstructions between us – and burst into tears. 'Oh, what can we do?' she cried. 'How can we help?'

'You're pregnant,' said Casta.

That was some deduction, given the evidence. But I buried my head in Liss's shoulder and whispered 'Yes.'

Liss pushed away from me, holding me at arm's length, and cried: 'But that's wonderful!' She looked to Casta for support. 'Isn't it?'

'She didn't ask permission,' Casta said, her voice steady. Evaluating me.

'It was an accident,' I said.

'But you have to keep it!' Liss said, then to Casta: 'She has to keep it!'

'She wants to keep it. That's why she's come to us.'

'Oh.' Liss was catching on now. She glanced around the sculpture-garden, searching for sinister eavesdroppers. It was deserted but for a few bats chasing ragged circles above us.

'Will you help me? I have no one else to turn to,' I pleaded. I knew the idea of helping someone in trouble was an easy sell to Liss, but Casta was tougher. I got the impression she was not convinced by my tears.

Liss made appealing eyes at her twin, thoroughly on my side. But Casta was giving nothing away.

'This child,' she said. 'It means a lot to you.'

'It means everything.'

'What if our brother says no?'

I opened my mouth to answer, and shut it again. My intuition told me something was amiss here. It felt like a test. I knew what I should say, but somehow I knew it would be the wrong thing. Casta needed convincing. She needed the truth.

'I'll keep it anyway,' I said. 'No matter what.'

Almost as soon as the words had left my mouth, I regretted them. If they told Ledo what I'd said, he'd have me imprisoned. Our chance for escape would be gone.

I heard Liss suck her breath in through her teeth. I waited, my eyes locked with Casta's blank ones. There was no telling how she would react to that kind of defiance from a Bondswoman.

'We will speak to Ledo,' Casta said slowly. Then she turned and walked away without another word. Liss was torn between her twin and I for a few moments; then she gave me an apologetic glance, kissed me swiftly and hurried after Casta. Ledo received Rynn and I at his table, where he was taking his morning meal: strips of boiled fish in a fruit sauce. He looked spectral, dressed in a white brocaded robe only marginally paler than his skin. A thick mane of braids and twists hung around his face. Jewelled bands and interwoven ribbons of red and blue in his hair were the only hint of colour about him, except for the bleak blue of his irises: the natural colour of the Nathka tribe.

'My beloved Orna,' he said, his voice soft. 'My heart swells to see you.'

'It's an honour to sit at your table again,' I replied.

'And Rynn, equally beloved; I trust your endeavours bear sweetness?'

My husband's awkwardness was excruciating to witness. Ledo had picked up the watery, over-emotional manner of speaking which had become stylish in society of late. Rynn didn't quite know how to respond to it, so he mumbled something about what an honour it was, clumsily following my lead.

He invited us to join him at the table with an airy sweep of his hand. The table was carved from mycora, as were the rounded walls of the room. Most of the Caracassa Mansions were built of the stuff, cut from the enormous roots that spilled through Veya's cavern wall and into the Tangles.

Two bodyguards stood nearby: Caydus and Jyirt. Both of them carried enormous curved blades. Caydus was hulking, ruddy-skinned, with a mane of bright blond hair, while Jyirt was bald and had a cadaverous look about him. I knew them both slightly. They were not concerned: we were part of Ledo's Cadre, the inner circle of the Plutarch's most trusted retainers. If he was safe around anyone, it was us.

Handmaidens appeared, bringing breakfast platters of bread, succulent spores, flaked fish and expensive fruits from the chasm-fields near the surface. I was famished, but I knew I wouldn't be able to eat anything, just as I hadn't been able to all last turn. My stomach felt too knotted to manage food. It didn't stop Rynn, however, who went for the plates before I nudged him to remind him that the Plutarch was served first. He retreated, blushing.

'Will the twins be joining us at breakfast?' I asked, to salvage the situation.

'The twins do as they will, accountable only to each other,' said Ledo, with the shallowest of smiles. I didn't like his tone.

The handmaidens served us in silence, then retreated from the room. Ledo had become grave, and it chilled me. I had no idea what the twins had said to him, or if they had told him of my defiance in the sculpture-garden.

'When you married, I gave my permission with a gladdened soul,' he said. 'Some said that for two of my Cadre to be so joined in love would weaken the both of them. That a man could not give himself to combat if he had given himself to a wife. A woman could not use all her silken wiles if she feared to betray a husband.'

Rynn shifted uncomfortably and cleared his throat. That aspect of my craft was never spoken of, ever. There was no way I could explain to him the kind of steely hatred I felt for myself when I slept with other men. Nor would he ever be convinced that it was utterly necessary in some cases, because the surest way to a man's secrets was through his bed. Being a Bondswoman meant loyalty to the master above all. Even my husband.

'But I believed in you,' Ledo said. 'And you rewarded my trust. You have become valuable as the rarest of jewels to me.' He bit into a fruit, chewed, then held it up before him and examined it. 'I wonder, will a child diminish you the way they thought your marriage might?'

He didn't appear to be asking us, but rather himself, so we kept quiet. Rynn ate, trying to make as little noise as possible.

Ledo put the fruit down and lowered his eyes. 'Disappointment aches in my stomach like the voids,' he said heavily.

'I swear, we didn't mean for this to happen,' I said. 'We would never intentionally conceive without your approval.'

'Your loyalty is not in question, Orna. But there is precedent to consider. There are others in my Cadre who may also desire children. What soothing words will I have for them?'

I had nothing to say. There was no defence that would convince him.

He sighed and sat back, steepling his fingers and tapping his index fingers against his teeth. 'You will continue to work for me as a spy until your condition prevents you,' he said. 'You understand, I am sure, how the lush bloom of pregnancy can be exploited to lower suspicions in the society of men and women. I will arrange someone else for the more physical aspects of your work.'

My breath was trapped in my throat. I could barely believe what I was hearing. Rynn continued eating, gazing hard at his plate. Food offered the only safety in the room for him.

'The child will be creched as soon as it is reasonable to do so,' he continued. 'If I see the quality of your work diminish even a little, Orna, your child will be taken. Rynn, my words brush you also.'

Rynn looked up at him briefly, then back at his plate.

'Thank you,' I whispered. 'You won't regret your decision, Magnate. We will-'

'The child will also be Bonded to Clan Caracassa,' he interrupted. 'Standard lifedebt, for a single generation. It shall not pass to their offspring, but they shall be mine as you are.'

My relief curdled in my mouth. No, no, no, this was too cruel. Our children were supposed to be free, to choose their own paths in life. Rynn had wanted that even more than I. Rynn, who had never known anything but Bondsmanship. Rynn, still paying for his grandfather's mistake even now. Abyss, they were meant to have the chance at a normal life even if we could not.