Аманда Хокинг - Fate

“Why aren’t you doing anything?” I yelled at him. “We have to do something!”

“We are trying to!” Ezra insisted. “Milo broke his neck and cracked his skull! Even if he lives, he’ll probably be brain damaged and a quadriplegic.”

“So you’re just going to let him die?” I cried incredulously.

“I don’t think that’s what anyone’s saying,” Mae murmured. I turned to look at her, trying to understand the conflicted expression on her face when it finally dawned on me.

“We can try the hospitals,” Ezra relented, watching the very slow rise and fall of Milo’s chest as he breathed shallowly. “Or… we can turn him.”

“Into a vampire?” I swallowed hard, trying to grasp everything. Jack finally released me and took a step away from me. When I managed to pull my gaze away from Milo, I looked up at him, and saw his eyes filled with tears.

“I am so sorry, Alice,” Jack apologized, his voice thick with despair.

“His heart is slowing,” Ezra looked at me evenly. “You’re going to have to make a choice, Alice.

Quickly.”

“If he turns, he’ll live, right?” I asked breathlessly.

“If we catch it in time,” Ezra answered hesitantly. “But it’s not a sure thing. If he’s already too weakened, the turn might just push him over the edge.”

“You mean instead of saving him, it might kill him?” The room felt like it was spinning, and Jack reached out to steady me, tentatively putting his arm around me.

“I’m sorry,” Ezra said simply, but his words were filled with empathy.

“What am I supposed to do?” I cried.

It was an impossible decision. On one hand, he might die or become a vegetable. On the other, he might die or become a vampire, and I had no idea how he’d feel about becoming one.

“I can do it,” Jack offered, knowing that somehow, it would make me more comfortable with the decision. He took a step away from me, moving closer to Milo, and looked at me earnestly. “If this is what you want, I’ll do it.”

“Do it,” I whispered hoarsely.

“Are you sure?” Ezra asked gravely.

“What choice do I have?”

I knew he was just trying to gauge my certainty, but that was impossible to measure. My frame of mind was somewhere between total shock and blacked out hysteria. Tears were streaming down my cheeks, mixing in with some of the blood I had inadvertently rubbed off of Jack’s chest when he held me to him. And Milo was laying on the island, barely breathing and his heart slowing every second. If this was going to happen, it had to happen now, and as far as I could tell it would be his best chance for survival.

Turning into a vampire, or deciding that someone else should turn, was no easy decision. Even though I wanted to become one, I hadn’t let myself really think about all the ramifications, like immortality and drinking blood. I didn’t have to yet, because I planned on waiting a few more years so I could be around Milo. I wanted to help him and protect him, but that joke was on me. If I had turned six months ago, when I was initially offered the choice, I would’ve long since been out of Milo’s hair, and he would’ve just been sitting at home on the computer right now instead of dying in a kitchen.

“Everything will be okay, love,” Mae murmured. She had made her way over to my side and wrapped an arm around me. Part of me wanted to push her off, but I didn’t have the strength, so I just let her stroke my hair.

“We’ll see,” I replied quietly. Jack had started rummaging through a drawer, and he was wasting precious time that I suspected we didn’t have. “What are you doing?”

“I need a knife,” Jack replied apologetically and looked back at Mae for help.

“There’s one in the kitchen sink,” Mae told him.

Jack quickly sifted through the dirty dishes in the sink and pulled out the knife Mae had been using to cut fruit. He walked over to the island, holding the knife, and his breathing got more rugged. He was afraid of what he was about to do but didn’t see any alternative.

“Do you want to see this?” Ezra asked me, sending a new shiver down my spine.

“Yes, of course.” I couldn’t imagine being anywhere else when this was happening, no matter how terrifying or disturbing it might be. If this was where Milo died or turned or whatever, I wanted to be here, with him.

Jack glanced once over at me, his eyes burning with regret and apology. Then he looked down at Milo and nodded. With one deft move, he sliced open his wrist, and blood trickled out from it. He barely even noticed the pain and pressed his wound up against Milo’s mouth.

“Ezra,” Jack shook his head, sounding scared. “He’s not responding.”

“Give it time,” Ezra said.

“What if he doesn’t wake up?” Jack asked, panicking. His cut was already starting to close, and he had to use his other hand to pry it open, allowing his blood to drip on Milo’s mouth.

“Give it time,” Ezra told him firmly.

My heart was racing wildly, and while I knew that wouldn’t really help the situation, I couldn’t slow it. Whatever was supposed to be happening wasn’t happening. Jack was terrified, and Mae tightened her grip around me, probably in case I decided to flip out again.

Then Jack gasped sharply, and he was filled with a mixture of pleasure and pain. Milo had woken up enough to sink his teeth into his arm, but very little else seemed to be happening with him.

Jack groaned, and I tried to understand what he was feeling, but it was too many things all once.

Relief, shame, guilt, agony, ecstasy.

Suddenly, Milo started coughing, and Jack pulled his arm back. Milo didn’t really seem to be awake, and it looked like he was choking on Jack’s blood.

“He’s choking!” I yelled, and Mae’s arms stopped me from performing CPR on Milo.

“No, he’s fine,” Ezra assured me.

“He’s okay?” Jack winced, wrapping a towel around his wrist until the blood stopped.

“It’s too soon to tell,” Ezra said.

“What do you mean it’s too soon?” I struggled against Mae, but she held me firm. “If he’s breathing, doesn’t that mean it worked?”

“It’s a process that takes a couple days,.” Ezra explained, then looked past me at Mae.

“I’ll go ready a room for him,” Mae announced quietly, and then finally let me go.

For the first time since this all began, I was free to rush over to my brother. He was still coughing a little and his body seemed to shudder involuntarily. I pushed back the hair from his forehead, damp from the lake and his own blood, and his eyelids trembled but didn’t open. His lips were covered with Jack’s blood, and I wanted to wipe it away, but I was afraid too. For now, I was okay with just stroking his hair and crying as I watched him struggle to breathe.

“Alice,” Ezra said softly and gently placed his hand on my arm.

When I finally pulled my gaze away from Milo, I was surprised to see it was only the two of us in the kitchen, along with my brother. I had been so fixated on watching Milo brother that I hadn’t noticed Jack leave the room. Time had obviously passed, but I couldn’t be certain of how much.

Everything felt out of whack.

“What?” I tried to focus on Ezra, but my eyes were sore and blurry from crying.

“Why don’t you go get cleaned up? Then I’ll take Milo and clean him up and make sure he’s comfortable upstairs.” Ezra’s warm brown eyes tried to comfort me, but I laid an arm over Milo possessively.

“I can clean him up,” I insisted, but Ezra shook his head softly.

“You can’t carry him, Alice,” Ezra explained carefully. “This whole thing has you exhausted and frayed.

You need to clear your head a bit, and then you can check on Milo once he’s settled in. There’s nothing more you can do for him right now.”