Eoin Colfer - Artemis Fowl - the time paradox

Artemis did not look back, though he ached to. He could hear Opal clanking across the boards, swearing with each breath. The words sounded almost comical in her childlike pixie voice.

Nowhere to go but forward. Artemis almost fell on to the second span of bridge, pulling himself along the rope rail until he arrived at Mother Superior. Locals said that if you stood at the right point on the coastline at sunrise, and squinted a little, then you could just make out stern features on the Mother Superior’s face.

The rock felt stern now. Bleak and unforgiving. Even one false step would not be tolerated.

Artemis dropped to his knees on the mushroom curve of the plateau, cupping his left elbow in his right palm.

Soon, shock and pain will overcome me. Not yet, genius. Focus.

Artemis glanced down to the V of his jacket. The furry head was gone.

Dropped on Little Sister. Waiting for Opal.

This was confirmed by a sudden shriek of delight from behind. Artemis turned slowly and with great effort to face his enemy. It seemed as though he had been fighting her forever.

The pixie stood atop the sea stack, almost dancing with delight. Artemis could see a small furry figure splayed on the plateau.

‘I have him,’ Opal cackled. ‘With all your genius! With your big bursting brain! You dropped him! You simply dropped him!’

Artemis felt the throb build in his shoulder. In a minute, there would be worse coming, he was certain of it.

Opal stretched two hands towards her prize.

‘He is mine,’ she said reverentially, and Artemis swore he heard thunder in the distance. ‘The ultimate magic is mine. I have the lemur.’

Artemis spoke clearly, so his words would carry across the divide.

‘It’s not a lemur,’ he said. ‘It’s a monkey.’

Opal’s smile froze, all tiny teeth, and she grabbed what she had thought was Jayjay. The figure was soft in her hands.

‘A toy!’ she gasped. ‘This is a toy.’

Artemis’s triumph was dulled by pain and exhaustion. ‘Opal, meet Professor Primate. My brother’s plaything.’

‘A toy,’ repeated Opal dully. ‘But there were two heat sources. I saw them.’

‘Microwave gel pack stuffed inside the foam,’ explained Artemis. ‘It’s over, Opal. Jayjay is in Haven by now. You can’t get him. Turn yourself in and I won’t have to hurt you.’

Opal’s features were twisted with rage.

‘Hurt me! Hurt me ?’ She dashed the toy monkey against the rock surface over and over again until the dented works fell out. A metallic voice issued from the speaker.

‘History will remember this day… History will… History will remember this day.’

Opal screamed and red sparks boiled round her fingertips.

‘I cannot fly and I cannot shoot lightning, but I have enough magic to boil your brain.’

Opal’s dreams of supreme power were forgotten. At that moment all she wanted to do was kill Artemis Fowl. She stepped on to the second span with murder in her heart.

Artemis stood wearily, reaching into his pocket.

‘Your armour should save you,’ he said to Opal, his voice calm. ‘It will be terrifying, but the LEP will dig you out.’

Opal scoffed. ‘More tactics. Bluff and double bluff. Not this time, Artemis.’

‘Don’t make me do this, Opal,’ Artemis pleaded. ‘Just sit down and wait for the LEP. No one needs to get hurt.’

‘Oh, I think someone needs to get hurt,’ said Opal.

Artemis took a modified laser pointer from his pocket, activating the narrow beam and aiming it at the base of Little Sister.

‘What are you going to do with that thing? It would take a hundred years to saw through this rock.’

‘I’m not trying to saw through it,’ said Artemis, keeping the beam steady. ‘And it’s not a rock.’

Opal raised her hands, sparks laced like barbed wire round her fingers.

No more talk.

Artemis’s laser beam cut deep into the base of Little Sister, until it pierced the outer shell and reached the vast pocket of methane beneath.

Little Sister was not a rock. It was the seventh kraken, attracted by the magical resonance of Hybras. Artemis had been studying it for years. Not even Foaly knew it was there.

The explosion was huge, shooting a column of fire fifteen metres into the air. The outer shell collapsed under Opal, engulfing her in a blizzard of shrapnel.

Artemis heard the dull twang of her LEP armour flexing to take the shock.

Foaly’s armour should save her.

He threw himself flat on the sea stack, suffering the rain of rock, weed and even fish on his back and legs.

Luck will save me now. Only luck.

And luck did save him. The plateau was hammered with several sizeable missiles but none struck Artemis. He was hailed with smaller objects and would have a hundred bruises and cuts to add to his list of injuries, but not a single bone was broken.

When the world felt as though it had stopped vibrating, Artemis crawled to the lip of the sea stack and gazed down at the bubbling sea below. A pyramid of rubble steamed gently in the waves where the kraken had been. The great beast would be moving away silently now, to find another magical hotspot. Of Opal there was no sign.

The LEP will find her.

Artemis turned over on his back and watched the stars. He did this often, and the sight usually caused him to wonder how he could reach the planets orbiting those pinpricks of light, and what he would find there. On this evening, the stars just made him feel tiny and insignificant. Nature was vast and mighty and would eventually swallow him, even the memory of him. He lay there cold and alone on the plateau, waiting for a feeling of triumph that he realized would never arrive, and listening to the distant shouts of the villagers as they made their way across the long meadow.

Holly arrived before the villagers, gliding in from the north, touching down soundlessly on the sea stack.

‘You’re flying,’ said Artemis, as though he had never seen this before.

‘I borrowed a suit from Number One’s bodyguards. Well, I say borrowed …’

‘How did you find me?’ asked Artemis, though he could guess.

‘Oh, I saw a huge explosion and wondered, Now who could that be?’

‘Hmm,’ said Artemis. ‘A bit of a giveaway.’

‘Also, I followed my old suit’s radiation trail. I’m still following it.’ Holly touched a finger to her visor and the filter changed. ‘That’s quite a pile of rocks you dumped on Opal. It’s going to take a Retrieval team some time to dig her out. She’s cursing like a tunnel dwarf down there. What did you do to her?’

‘The seventh kraken,’ explained Artemis. ‘The one Foaly missed because it was tubular rather than conical, I would guess. I picked it up on a weather satellite.’

Holly placed a finger on Artemis’s forehead. ‘Typical Artemis Fowl. Beaten to a pulp and still he delivers a lecture.’

Magical sparks flowed from Holly’s fingertip, engulfing Artemis like a cocoon. He felt comforted and peaceful, like a baby in its blanket. His pains were wiped away and his shattered collarbone liquefied, then solidified whole.

‘Nice trick,’ he said, smiling, his eyes glassy.

‘I’m here till Tuesday,’ said Holly, smiling back. ‘Number One filled my tank.’

Artemis gazed up at his friend through a red haze. ‘I’m sorry I lied to you, Holly. Truly. You’ve done so much.’

Holly’s eyes were distant. ‘Maybe you made the wrong decision; maybe I would have made that decision myself. We’re from different worlds, Artemis. We will always have doubts about each other. Let’s just carry on and leave the past in the past, where it should be.’

Artemis nodded. That was as good as he was going to get, and better than he deserved.