Stephen Donaldson - Fatal Revenant

At Berek’s command, Yellinin rode with them, leading a string of six more horses laden with supplies: food, drink, blankets, and firewood, as well as provender for the mounts; as much of Berek’s generosity as the horses’ meagre strength could carry.

The outrider herself said little. Berek had ordered her to ask no questions; and she obeyed with hard-bitten determination, stifling her curiosity and loneliness. She could not have been sure that she would ever see her lord or her comrades again. Yet even when Linden tried practical queries-How far have we ridden today? Do you think that this weather will hold? — Yellinin answered so curtly that Linden’s more personal questions seemed to freeze in her mouth.

At all times, Covenant kept his right hand hidden in his pocket. Linden supposed that he did so in order to conceal his one resemblance to Berek Halfhand. But she felt sure that his caution was wasted. With his awakened senses, Berek must have discerned the truth for himself.

Jeremiah also was a halfhand, although he had lost different fingers. Legends might grow from such small details

By the end of the third day, Linden reached the limit of her endurance. Yellinin’s emotional plight nagged at her like a bad tooth: she was acutely aware of the slow erosion which wore the outrider’s determination down to bereavement. Nor could she ignore the leaden distress of the horses. And the questions that she needed to ask her companions were becoming a form of torment: as bitter as the cold, and as relentless.

In addition, she felt a grinding anxiety for Jeremiah. According to Yellinin, the riders had covered no more than twenty-five leagues when the sun set on the third day. Measured by the necessity of ascending among the Westron Mountains in order to avoid Garroting Deep, their progress was paltry. At this rate, Covenant and Jeremiah would never attain their goal. The horses would not survive: Linden was sure of that. If she could not sustain herself with Earthpower, she herself would fail long before she caught sight of Melenkurion Skyweir.

Her son would be Lord Foul’s prisoner forever.

That night, as she faded shivering toward sleep, she realised that most of her decisions in this time had been inspired by cold; predicated on the brutality of winter. She had chosen to trek toward Berek’s camp because she was freezing and could not think of an alternative. But when she had achieved her aim-horses, blankets, food-she had accomplished nothing. The journey ahead of her was still impossible, just as it had been four days ago. Yellinin and her mounts were giving as much help as their worn flesh allowed, and it was not enough.

Linden had already watched too many innocents suffer and die for her sake.

Now the cold required another decision of her. She had to accept that her choices had been proven inadequate; that the obstacles in her road were not ones which she could surmount. The time had come to admit that she was too weak to carry the burden of Jeremiah’s need, and the Land’s. This winter demanded more strength than she possessed.

Therefore she would have to find a way to trust Covenant.

The next morning, when she struggled out of the scant warmth of her blankets, she learned that two of the horses had died during the night: Covenant’s mount, and Jeremiah’s. Then she could no longer deny the truth. The cold had beaten her. If bearing her companions killed just two horses every three days-and if there were no storms-and if the terrain did not become more demanding-Yellinin’s dogged aid would nonetheless cease to serve any purpose long before the Last Hills merged with the mountains.

Coughing at the bite of ice in her lungs, Linden gathered what warmth she could from the campfire while Berek’s warrior cooked a breakfast of gruel laced with fruit. She took as much time as she needed to eat what she believed would be her last hot meal. For a while, she held her robe open to the flames, hoping that the fur would absorb enough heat to preserve her. Then, when Yellinin had prepared mounts for the riders, and had withdrawn to ready the remaining horses, Linden quietly asked Covenant and Jeremiah to ride ahead without her.

To answer Covenant’s vexation and Jeremiah’s alarm, she explained, “I need a little distance so that I can use my Staff. Don’t worry, I’ll catch up with you.” She could hardly miss their trail through the hard snow. “I want Yellinin to turn back. But convincing her probably won’t be easy. I’ll have to show her that we don’t need her, and for that-”

Linden indicated the Staff with a shrug.

“It’s about time,” muttered Covenant as if he had expected her to make up her mind days ago. “Just don’t trust her. Berek didn’t send her out here to help us. He wants her to warn him if we double back. Hell, he probably has scouts on our trail right now, just in case we kill her and try to take him by surprise.”

Staring at him, Linden felt a slash of yearning for the Thomas Covenant of her memories. Surely he could see that Yellinin was dying to return to her people? But she did not argue. Her suspicions ran too deep. If she challenged him, she would make him wary; and then she would lose any possibility that he might reveal the truth about himself.

“Just go,” she urged him stiffly. “And brace yourself. I’ll take care of Yellinin.”

Jeremiah attempted an unconvincing smile. “Thanks, Mom. You’re doing the right thing.” To Covenant, he added. “The Theomach won’t object. He trusts her now.”

“I know,” Covenant sighed as he and Jeremiah mounted their new horses. “I’m just too bloody frustrated to be gracious about it. This is our fifth day, and we’re still nowhere near Melenkurion Skyweir. These damn delays are killing me.”

Rolling its eyes, Jeremiah’s mount flinched. Covenant’s emaciated mustang stumbled awkwardly. But they kept their seats. In moments, they rode out of sight around the curve of a hill.

Linden remained where she was, clinging to the last of the campfire while she waited for Yellinin.

When the other horses were ready, the outrider walked grimly toward Linden. Daylight emphasised her years as well as her weariness: she seemed old for a warrior, aged by interminable seasons of battle and injury. And her eyes betrayed her uneasiness. Clearly she had guessed why Linden had stayed behind to talk to her; and her heart was torn. Her devotion to Berek’s commands vied with a vivid ache for her comrades and her cause. Studying her, Linden recognised her reluctance to die for people who refused to reveal either their loyalties or their purposes.

When Linden did not speak at once, Yellinin asked cautiously. “What transpires, my lady? Why have your companions departed?”

In the outrider’s tone, Linden heard that Covenant had named at least one aspect of the woman’s dilemma. Yellinin was worried that Covenant and Jeremiah, if not Linden herself, might still pose some inexplicable threat to Berek’s army.

“I need distance,” Linden replied in wisps of vapour. “I’m going to use my Staff. That’s dangerous for them.” And for herself: without Covenant and Jeremiah, she would be stranded in this time. “If they’re far enough away, they’ll be safe.”

Yellinin frowned. “My lady, you know that I have been commanded to question nothing. Yet it may be that I will fail in my duty if I do not speak. Therefore I ask what use you will make of your fire.”

“Two things.” Linden could not bring herself to say, I don’t want you to throw your life away. “With your permission, I’ll do what I can to make you and your horses stronger. And I hope that I can persuade you to rejoin Lord Berek.”

Before Yellinin could object, Linden said, “You and your horses have already suffered too much. No matter what I do, they won’t last much longer. And we don’t need you to guide us. Covenant knows the way.