K. Mills - The Accidental sorcerer

And you're in love with her. He knew the signs. Maybe this time Monk's lightning-strike passion would last longer than a month… and maybe it wouldn't. But either way it'd be an interesting ride.

For himself he didn't mind. He liked the princess; perhaps even cared for her. But she wasn't for him. Not like that.

'Ha,' said Reg, finally joining in. 'Teacups. I was all set to poke them in the unmentionables, that would've made them sit up and squawk!'

Monk shook his head. 'I dunno, Gerald. How do you stand it?'

He stroked Reg's wing with one finger. 'Well, you know. She kind of grows on you…'

'Yes, yes, I remember. Like fungus,' said Reg, and sniffed. 'I suppose,' she added, grudgingly, 'the girl didn't handle herself too shabbily. I suppose I could stand it if I saw her again.' Then she shuddered. 'But only if she swears to burn her wardrobe!'

Melissande, finished with putting Rupert in his place, turned.'I heard that, bird.' Reg smirked. 'You were meant to, ducky'

'I really have to go,' said Monk, forestalling bloodshed. 'If you're coming, Melissande, then come. Your Majesty — ' He bowed. 'Thank you.'

Rupert rested his hand on Monk's shoulder. 'No, my friend. The debt is mine and New Ottosland's. Visit us whenever you can.'

'I certainly will, sir, provided I'm not chained to my desk. Or a damp wall somewhere deep underground.' He turned. 'Look. Gerald. Don't do it, mate, all right? Not unless you really want to.' Gerald stared.'Do what?' 'I'll see you later. Back in Ottosland.'

'Markham! Don't do what? What are you talking about?' But Monk was gone.

Melissande glared, hands on hips. 'I'd better go too. Now you rest, do you hear me, Gerald? Or when I come back I'll — I'll be snippy! Reg rolled her eyes.'Tliat'll make a change.'

'Melissande!' Monk bellowed from beyond the bedroom.

'You've been warned!' said Melissande, and fled. As Gerald stared after her Rupert sat in the armchair by the bed.

'Well,' he said, and crossed his legs. It was incredible. He actually looked elegant. 'You'd like an explanation, I imagine.'

A headache was brewing behind his eyes. In a strange way he felt almost betrayed, though he and Rupert weren't actual real friends, i think I'm owed one. Don't you… Rupert?' Rupert nodded. 'You and many others, Gerald.' 'So. Exactly how long did you know?'

'That Lional was… unstable?' Rupert steepled his fingers. It was profoundly disconcerting, such an un-Rupert-like pose.'Since I was six.' 'What happened when you were six?'

A flicker of pain twisted Rupert's face. 'Lional killed someone I cared for. Our nanny. He was ten.' Ten? 'How?'

'A toy left carelessly on top of a staircase,' said Rupert. His gaze was unfocussed, lost in memory. 'Of course everyone said it was an accident. Lional wept. But as she lay dying Nanny asked to see me. Held me close to her poor broken body and whispered, 7t was murder. Never turn your back on your brother, lovey. Never let him see your true face. This poor kingdom will need you one day! Rupert shrugged. 'Nanny never lied to me. I believed her.'

Gerald felt a cold shiver run through him. 'And so you invented… the other Rupert.'

'Not all at once,' said Rupert, nodding. 'I didn't wish to arouse suspicions. Just day by day… one mannerism, one eccentricity at a time… until my true face was hidden, not just from Lional but from Melissande too. From the whole world.' He grimaced. 'From myself, in the end.'

He tried to imagine it and couldn't. 'But you were only six. You were a child!

'A child?' Rupert laughed; a dreadful sound. 'With Lional as my older brother? Oh, Gerald. I was never a child.' 'But what about your parents?'

'What about them? They doted on their kingdom's heir. Lional was… a beautiful boy. It was only later, as his nature refined itself, that they began to worry. I think, perhaps, to suspect. But by then it was far too late.' Reg cleared her throat. 'Silly buggers.'

Rupert did a double take then smiled. 'I'm sorry. I confess I still find you a trifle hard to believe…'

'Ha,' said Reg. 'This from the man with a pet butterfly named Esmerelda.' She sniffed. 'How's the little Dumb Cluck doing, anyway?'

'You mean she's not dead?' said Gerald. And why that would sting him with tears he couldn't begin to say…

Rupert smiled sadly. 'No. She's the only survivor, though. I found her hiding under a rose bush. With Boris.'

It was ridiculous but he felt comforted by the news.'I'm glad.'

'Believe it or not, so am I,' said Rupert. 'She really is very sweet.' His expression darkened. 'And after seeing the carnage at the stables… and elsewhere in the kingdom… I needed cheering up.'

'I'm sorry,' Gerald said at last. His throat was hot and tight; it was hard to get the words out.

'Not your fault,' said Rupert heavily. He looked ill. Years older.

Did he believe that or just say it because it was expected? Because the wizard was half-blind now and needed careful handling? Gerald couldn't tell. But in staring at Rupert, trying to decide, he discovered a rising resentment.

'You should've told me what you knew' The criticism came out more sharply than he intended, than perhaps was wise. But he was tired and newly aching and blind in one eye. 'Maybe if you'd told me — '

'I couldn't!' said Rupert just as sharply. Then he sighed. 'It was too risky. I couldn't trust you'd not give me away. Not on purpose, perhaps, but even so. Lional was very… astute.'

Astute. That was one word. 'He was mad, Rupert.'

'Oh yes,' said Rupert softly. 'Above all else, he was mad.' He hesitated, then added, 'And of course it seemed for a while there you were in his pocket.'

'Except I wasn't! I was only pretending so I could find out what the hell was going on! Melissande asked me to — ' i know,' said Rupert, placating, it seems all of us were wearing masks, Gerald. Trying to protect each other or ourselves. I did the best I could, you know. I tried to put you on your guard. Steer you in the right direction. I just couldn't afford to be explicit. If I had been, you can be sure I'd have met with an accident too.'

Although resentment lingered he had to smile. 'You should've been an actor, Rupert. I never dreamed there was a brain inside that ninny head of yours.' Rupert grinned.'Thank you. I think.' He winced. 'Sorry'

'Don't be,' said Rupert, amusement fading, i'm the one who should be apologising. I've hardly slept since…' He cleared his throat. 'Hindsight is an unkind thing. Could I have stopped him? One minute I'm convinced I couldn't, the next I'm sure if I'd just confided in you or Greenfeather, if I'd gone for help, persuaded Melissande to leave, raised the alarm, fled to Zazoor — ' it seems to me,' said Reg, hopping onto the bedrail and fixing them with a stern dark gaze, 'there's not one of us not wishing right now we'd done something different. That's called second-guessing yourself, that is, and if you ask me it's a load of mouldy old bollocks. If only — / wish — what if — ' She snorted, i'm telling you, Rupert, and you too, Gerald, and you can pass it along to Princess Pushy when she gets back: you'll drive yourselves as mad as that mad bugger Lional if you start down that road. We can't undo what's happened. The dead are buried and we can't unbury them. All we can do is live what's left of our lives in a way that won't shame their memories. And make sure nothing like this ever happens again.' 'Indeed,' said Rupert after a prickly silence.

Gerald nodded. 'I suppose.' He just had no idea how.'So. What happens now?'

'Now?' Rupert frowned, considering. 'Now I appoint a new privy council and get on with the business of governing the kingdom. New Ottosland is hurt, and as her king it's my job to heal her wounds.'

'And what about the Kallarapi? Are they still hanging around, or have you sent them packing?'