Harry Turtledove - Through the Darkness

Ealstan was still shaky on his feet. The young Forthwegian gauged how sick he’d been by how long he was taking to get better. He also gauged how sick he’d been by the medicine with which Vanai had helped him break his fever.

When his wits came back, he scolded her: “You went out. You shouldn’t have done that. You shouldn’t have taken the chance. The Algarvians might have grabbed you and. .” He didn’t want to go on.

Vanai glared at him. Her gray-blue eyes flashed. People said Kaunians didn’t get so excited as Forthwegians. Living with Vanai had proved to Ealstan that people didn’t know what they were talking about. “What should I have done?” she demanded. “Stayed here and watched you die and then tried to go out?”

“I wasn’t going to die.” But Ealstan’s comeback wasn’t so persuasive as he would have wanted, even to himself. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been so sick. When he looked at himself in the mirror, he saw how the flesh had melted from his swarthy, hook-nosed face. Circles almost as dark as his eyes lay under them.

“Anyhow, it worked out all right,” Vanai said. “I went out, I found an apothecary, I got what you needed, and I came back. Nothing else happened.”

“No?” Ealstan said, and now she had trouble meeting his gaze. He pointed at her. “What was it? How bad was it?”

“Nothing else happened,” she repeated, and slamming doors and falling bars were in her voice. A long time before, when they’d first got to know each other, he’d decided he would be wise not to ask her what she’d gone through in Oyngestun. This was liable to be another time when trying to force truth from her would do more harm than good.

“Let it go, then,” he said with a weary nod. He was still weary all the time. He was so weary, a couple of days could go by without his having any interest in making love. Before he got sick, he wouldn’t have believed such a thing possible.

But, weary or not, he had to go out to buy food, for the cupboards in the flat were nearly empty. If he didn’t go out, Vanai would have to. She’d done it once. He didn’t want her to have to do it twice, not when the redheaded occupiers of Forthweg had made her kind fair game.

Moving like a man four times his age, he walked to the market square to buy beans and dried peas and barley and lentils. As long as he and Vanai had enough of those, they wouldn’t starve. The trouble was, he couldn’t carry so much as he had before, either. That meant he had to make two trips to bring back the food he should have been able to take in one. By the time he finally got through, he felt ready for the knacker’s yard.

Vanai fixed him a cup of mint tea. After he’d drunk it, she half dragged him to the bedroom, peeled his shoes off him, and made him lie down. He hoped she would lie down beside him, or on top of him, or however she chose. Instead, she said, “Go to sleep.”

He did. When he woke, he felt much more like himself. By then, Vanai did lie curled beside him. Her mouth had fallen open; she was snoring a little. He looked over at her and smiled. She didn’t just know what he wanted. She knew what he needed, too, and that was liable to be more important.

A couple of days later, he started going out and about through Eoforwic, seeing the people for whom he cast accounts. He discovered he’d lost a couple of them to other bookkeepers: inevitable, he supposed, when he hadn’t been able to let them know why he wasn’t showing up. That he’d kept as many clients as he had pleased him very much.

Ethelhelm the singer and drummer wasn’t in his flat when Ealstan came to call. The doorman for the building said, “The gentleman has taken his band on tour, sir. He did give me an envelope to give you if you returned while he and his colleagues were away.”

“Thanks,” Ealstan said, and then had to hand the fellow a coin for doing what he should have done for nothing. Ealstan took the envelope and went off before opening it; whatever it held, he didn’t want the doorman knowing it.

Hello, the note read.

I’m hoping you’ve come down with something. If you haven’t, the Algar-vians have probably come down on you and your lady. You can get over the one easier than the other, I think, the way things are these days. If you ‘re reading this, everything is probably all right. If you ‘re not, then I wish you were. Take care of yourself.

The band leader had scrawled his name below the last sentence.

Ealstan smiled as he refolded the note and put it in his belt pouch. Ethel-helm enjoyed speaking in riddles and paradoxes. And Ealstan could hardly find fault with this one. Better to have any natural sickness than to let the Algarvians know he was harboring Vanai.

That point got driven home when he came back to his own sorry little street. A couple of overage, overweight Algarvian constables were standing in front of the block of flats next to his. One of them turned to him and asked, “You knowing any Kaunian bitch living in this street here?”

“No, sir,” Ealstan answered. “I don’t think any of the stinking blonds are left in this part of town.” He did his best to sound like an ordinary Forthwegian, a Forthwegian who hated Kaunians as much as King Mezentio’s men did.

The other Algarvian spoke in his own language: “Oh, leave it alone, by the powers above. So we didn’t get to have her. The world won’t end. She paid us off.”

“Bah,” the first constable said. “Even if all these buggers say they never saw her, we both know she’s around here somewhere.”

After King Mezentio’s men took Gromheort, Ealstan’s home town in eastern Forthweg, they’d made academy students start learning Algarvian instead of classical Kaunian. That no doubt helped make the students better subjects. It also sometimes had other uses. Ealstan made a point of looking as dull and uninterested as he could.

“Digging her out is more trouble than it’s worth,” the second constable insisted. “And if we try digging her out and don’t come up with her, we’ll be walking the beat around the city dump till the end of time. Come on, let’s go.”

Though he kept grumbling, the constable who’d spoken Forthwegian let himself be persuaded. Off he went with his pal. Ealstan stared after them. If they were talking about anyone but Vanai, he would have been amazed.

But they weren’t going to call in their pals and try to unearth her. Ealstan clung to that. As he walked upstairs, he wondered if he ought to mention what he’d overheard. He decided that was a bad idea.

When Vanai let him in after his coded knock, she clicked her tongue between her teeth in dismay. “Sit down,” she said in tones that brooked no argument. “You’re worn to a nub. Let me get you some wine. You shouldn’t have gone out.”

“I have to keep my business going, or else we won’t be able to buy food,” he said, but he was glad to sit down on the shabby sofa and stretch his feet out in front of him. Vanai fetched him the wine, clucking all the while, and sat down beside him. He cocked his head to one side. “You don’t need to make such a fuss over me.”

“No?” She raised an eyebrow. “If I don’t, who will?”

Ealstan opened his mouth, then closed it again. He had no good answer, and was smart enough to realize as much. If they didn’t take care of each other here in Eoforwic, no one else would. Things weren’t as they had been back in Gromheort for him, with his mother and father and sister to worry about him and his big brother to flatten any nuisances he couldn’t handle himself.

And having Vanai fuss over him wasn’t like having his mother fuss. He had trouble defining how and why it wasn’t, but the difference remained. After another sip of wine, he decided that Vanai, even though she fussed, didn’t treat him as if he were two years old while she was doing it. As far as his mother was concerned, he would never be anything but a child.