L. Modesitt - Arms-Commander

Saryn laughed softly. “You have me, Lady. For everyone’s sake, including my own…what choice do I have? I cannot return to Westwind. Westwind cannot support another two companies of guards at present.” Nor could I deal with Ryba any longer. “There is no lord-holder powerful enough to hold Lornth together or to stand against the Suthyans or the Jeranyi.” Saryn stopped.

“And what of me, now that I have served your purpose, Saryn?”

“You did not serve my purpose.” Saryn smiled sadly. “I came to Lornth with only the goal of preserving your regency. The problem was-”

“That to preserve me, you ended up destroying the Lornth that was, just as the other angels began that destruction in order to save me. Now, what of me?”

“I would still be your friend and your supporter. You hold The Groves, Lady, in your own right, and you may consort as you like, if that is your choice, or not. One way or another, you will determine your family’s holdings. I will stand behind you, as I always have. You know, as do Lord Maeldyn and Lord Spalkyn, that the time has come for change.” Saryn shook her head. “You may not believe me, but I never left the Roof of the World with this, or anything like it, in mind.”

Zeldyan smiled wanly. “That I do know, and that makes it all the sadder, that we could not resolve our differences, and that an angel from beyond the Rational Stars must descend to set things right. You will create a legend, you know, and generations of girls will look to you.”

And if that is so, generations of men will curse me. “Only if I am successful, and that will be so only if you and others support me.”

“How could I not? You saved my life, and you are the only one who will grant me my due as my father’s daughter.”

“For your sake,” Saryn said gently, “I wish it had not come to this.”

“I thank you for those words.” Zeldyan offered another sad smile.

Saryn could sense the mixture of sadness, acceptance, and appreciation…and the grief beneath, which the former regent might bear all the rest of her days. “I would also be your friend…Zeldyan.”

“I would be yours…also.”

“I would like that very much.” And that, also, was truth, Saryn knew, for, if matters did work out, Zeldyan might well be the only woman in all Lornth who would understand a fraction of what Saryn felt.

Immediately after breakfast on fiveday-prepared and served in a cheery breakfast room by a kitchen staff that seemed exceedingly happy to welcome Saryn as the new lady-holder, Saryn made her way down the main corridor to the small guest chamber where Dealdron lay on the wide bed, propped up at a slight angle.

“Good morning,” she offered as she stepped into the room.

“Good morning, Commander.” His brow furrowed. “I dreamed you were here earlier. So was Lady Zeldyan…before my chest was bound.”

“We were.” And I have been several times when you didn’t recognize me. “You didn’t dream it. She came to thank you for saving her life. She and the other lord-holders have returned to their holdings for the present.” Maeldyn and Spalkyn had actually provided an escort for Zeldyan, and half of Maeldyn’s armsmen would remain at The Groves, along with what remained of Zeldyan’s armsmen, to keep order and control over the prisoners rebuilding and repairing the villa and its outbuildings.

Saryn concentrated on sensing Dealdron’s ribs and chest, as she had done two days earlier, when he had been slightly feverish and disoriented. There was still some wound chaos in places, but far less than what she had removed or neutralized before.

The younger man shifted his weight on the pillows supporting him.

“Hold still, if you will.”

Dealdron opened, then closed his mouth.

This time, it took only a few moments to remove the chaos, and she could sense that he was beginning to heal. She straightened slightly, then smiled. “You’ll be fine, but not all that soon.”

“You’re a healer, too, aren’t you?”

“I can do some healing. I’m not a healer.”

“I wouldn’t be here otherwise.”

“Probably not,” she replied with a smile, “but I wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t attacked those Lornians.”

“I only got two of them.”

“That was enough. I blocked one other and dived free. Klarisa and fourth squad killed the rest of them. You also saved Lady Zeldyan. She was most grateful.”

“The girls who brought me food, they said you were the new lord-holder here.”

“For now, perhaps for longer. All the lord-holders will be meeting in Lornth an eightday from next oneday. That will decide who will be the Overlord of Lornth.”

“You should be the overlord,” Dealdron said. “You have defeated all who came against you, and you are fair and just. Most of them are not.”

“I try to be fair,” Saryn acknowledged. “Being just is harder.”

“You see that. Most do not.”

Saryn could sense the warmth and the affection. Had Dealdron not still been so weak and injured, she suspected she might well have sensed a great deal more, and for a moment, and behind a pleasant smile, she had to struggle to maintain her composure. She did bend forward and take his hand for a moment. “You see in me what you would like to see.”

“No, Angel, I see what you are and will be.”

Saryn swallowed, taken aback by the faith and affection in and behind his words. Could she ever live up to that faith? Yet…

She managed another smile as she withdrew her hand. “You need to get well. Then we’ll talk about what happens.”

“What will happen is what will happen, but what ever happens, you are my angel.”

One way or another you will be his angel, but what do you say? She managed a grin. “What kind of angel, we’ll have to see.”

She did not quite flee his chamber, but she did take several deep breaths once she was back in the corridor alone for a moment. What ever might be, living up to his faith might be even harder than what has come before.

After a time, she headed out of the villa and toward the barracks area to find Hryessa.

The guard captain was watching as Klarisa directed the newer guards and even some recruits, it looked like, through the morning warm-up exercises. When Hryessa saw Saryn, the captain immediately turned and walked toward her commander.

“More new faces, I see,” observed Saryn.

“There are a few more every day. Some days, more than a few. You have inspired many.”

“Will they stay inspired?” Saryn had her doubts.

“Very few have left. Very few, even after seeing battles and other guards dying.”

It was hard for Saryn to accept that life for women in Lornth had been that hard, but it must have been. Otherwise, why would they remain so cheerfully? “We need to think about forming and training a full second company. Who would you suggest as the undercaptains for the two companies? The squad leaders of first and fourth squads?”

“They have been acting as such…at times.”

“You’ll have to watch over them closely.” Saryn grinned. “Not that you haven’t been.”

“I have, but they know what to do. They have watched us both.”

Saryn shook her head with a wry expression. I just hope they’ve watched you more. They shouldn’t be trying some of what I’ve done.

“They need to see that a woman can be fearless and successful, Commander.”

Saryn didn’t want to get into that. “How many should we take to Lornth?”

“I will take a full company with you. If you are to be overlord, we must be prepared. But we must leave some guards here.”

“What do you plan?” asked Saryn.