Гарднер Дозуа - Mermaids!

But to guid Mr. Munro, it was so much less likely that a woman in Scotland during the reign of George III would go barebottomed in the level daylight, and upon a rock he deemed too dangerous for bathing: it was infinitely likelier that she was a meremaid. He was, after all, a schoolteacher and a parochial one, and the parish was of the Kirk of Scotland.—But who knows how often this may have happened?

The next sighting is not long later, and in the same country: It does seem that either Scotland was partial to mermaids, or they to her.

1811. "In Campbelltown, 29th of October... In presence of Duncan Campbell, Esq., Sheriff-substitute of Kintyre, appeared John Mclsaac, tenant [-farmer]... solemnly swom and examined depones ... That having taken a walk towards the seashore, he came to the edge of a precipice... from which he saw something white upon a black rock... the upper half of it was white, and of the shape of a human body, and the other half towards the tail of a brindled reddish-grey colour apparently covered with long hair; and as the wind blew... it sometimes raised the hair over the creature's head, and every time... the animal would lean towards one side, and taking up the opposite hand, would stroke the hair backwards, and then leaning upon the other side of its head in the same manner. That at the same time... it would also spread or extend its tail like a fan... and while so extended, the tail continued in tremulous motion ... That the animal... was between four and five feet long, as near as he could judge. That it had a head, hair, arms and body, down to the middle like a human being, only that the arms were short in proportion to the body which appeared to be about the thickness of that of a young lad, and tapering gradually to the point of the tail... he cannot say if [the fingers] were webbed or not. [...] That after the sea had . . . [ebbed]... the animal... then tumbled clumsily into the sea... he saw its face ... which to him had all the appearance of the face of a human being, with very hollow eyes ... the animal was constantly ... stroking and washing its breast... he cannot say if the bosom was formed like a woman's or not ... All which he declares to be truth as he shall answer to God...

"Duncan Campbell, Sheriff-substitute."

Appended to this affidavit is another and briefer one: "We the Rev. Doctor George Robinson and Mr. Norman MacLeod, minister of Campbelltown, and James Maxwell, Esq., Chamberlain [i.e. J.P.] of Mull, do hereby certify that we were present when... John Mclsaac delivered his testimony ... That we know of no reason why his veracity should be called in question; and that from the manner in which he delivered his evidence, we are satisfied that he was impressed with a perfect belief, that the appearance of the animal he has described was such as he has represented it to be."

This seems to knock my rationalizations into a cocked hat ... or a Highland bonnet. And only a few days later, on Nov. 2nd, Sheriff Campbell is to take another deposition, this one from Katherine Loynachan, age not given, "who... was herding cattle for her father about three weeks ago [so, actually, before John McIsaac, on Sunday the 18th of Oct., saw his Animal] at the seaside ... [when] she observed some creature sliding on its belly off one of the rocks ... into the sea;... this creature had a head covered with long hair of a darkish color, the shoulders and back white, with the rest of the body tapering like a fish and ... of a darkish brown color... it disappeared under water, but... immediately ... came above water again ... and... laid one hand, which was like a boy's hand, upon another rock... That... the fact of it... had all the appearance of a child and as white, and at this time the animal was constantly rubbing or washing its breast with one hand, the fingers being close together... [Notice this inexplicable gesture... again.]

"Duncan Campbell, Sheriff-substitute."

Sheriff Campbell's conclusions, after these two incidents, would be very interesting indeed, but we don't have them. What we have next, though, is another sighting, also in Scotland, but about twenty years later, on the island of Benbecula, between the two larger islands (as Benwell and Waugh don't tell you, I shall) of North Uist and South Uist, in the Outer Hebrides: Gaelic in speech and Roman Catholic in religion. In that region where, about ninety years earlier Bonnie Prince Charley had made his romantic and ill-fated entrance into Scotland, some people had gone to cut seaweed. There was a splash, a cry, and those who ran to see what the cause, saw "a creature 'in the form of a woman in miniature,' some few feet away in the sea." The creature, whatever she was, was having fun in the water, tumbling about, evading attempts to catch her, when the inevitable rascal boy threw stones. "She was next heard of a few days later, but, alas, then she was dead; her body was washed ashore, about two miles from where she was first seen. A detailed examination followed.. .'the upper part of the creature was about the size of a well-fed child of three or four years of age, with an abnormally developed breast. The hair was long, dark and glossy, while the skin was white, soft, and tender. The lower part of the body was like a salmon, but without scales.'

"The lifeless body... attracted crowds to the beach where she lay, and the... spectators were convinced that they had gazed upon a mermaid at last.

"But the story does not end there. Mr. Duncan Shaw, factor (land agent) for Clanranald [the Clan Clanranald's head], baron-baillie and sheriff of the district, after seeing the corpse, gave orders that a coffin and shroud be made for the mermaid, and in the presence of many people she was buried"—not in churchyard or graveyard, but—"a little distance above the shore where she was found. This action of the factor [say Benwell and Waugh] is more eloquent than any signed testimony. A man who held his office was unlikely to be credulous, and that he ordered a coffin and shroud for the strange little creature cast upon his shores suggested that he thought she was at least partly human."

Indeed it did. One might add that "a man who held his office" was not likely to be generous, either. Not without extremely good reason.

The next listings are somewhat different. For lack of space here, I will cut them to the bone and number them, and—I warn you—am leaving out, for the time being, a most important piece of information. Chronologically they pick up where the others left off. Thus:

1) "In the month of February, 1849, two soldiers saw a boy come out of the jungle and go down to the stream to drink. They caught him, and gave him to a poor cultivator's widow. She could never get him to speak."

2) c. 1850. "A trooper was passing along the bank of a river when he saw a little boy on all fours who went down to the stream and drank. The trooper secured the boy and tried to make him speak, but could get nothing from him. Captain Nicholetts made the boy over to the charge of his servants, who take great care of him, but can never get him to speak a word."

3) c. late 1840's. "A trooper on the left bank of the__________River saw a boy drinking in the stream. He had a man with him on foot, and they managed to seize the boy. He could never be heard to utter more than one articulate sound ... could not understand or utter a word..."

4) "In 1860 the police brought in a male child, who moved by hops something like a monkey. He gave vent to snarls and sounds, something between a bark and a grunt."

5) c. same date. "... could never be taught to speak..."

6) Date unknown. "He was to all appearance about twenty years of age, was mute, but able to show signs of pleasure or anger by sounds..."

7) 1867-1894. "He was eventually tamed, but always had a wild look about him. He lived to be between thirty and forty, but never spoke."