Robert Asprin - Something MYTH Inc

"Let's just say that I've grown very fond of Massha while we were planning this little shindig together," Queen Hemlock smiled. "Oh, by the way. I've been thinking over your idea, and the more I think about it, the more I like it."

I had made the suggestion to her that, since the M.Y.T.H. Inc. crew would be moving on soon, she might want to consider offering the post of Royal Magician to Massha.

I was about to say something in return, but she suddenly held up a hand.

"Whoops! Gotta go now," she said. "They're about to throw the bridal bouquet. Don't want to miss out on the brawl."

With that, she moved back into the crowd, not exactly running, but certainly moving faster than her normal queenly glide.

What happened next was as fascinating as it was puzzling. Massha gathered together a fair-sized crowd of young women, including Bunny, Tananda, and Queen Hemlock. Then she deliberately turned her back on them, and tossed the bouquet of flowers she had been carrying back over her head into their midst. The ensuing scramble was not for the weak of heart.

What I couldn't understand was, with all the flowers adorning the courtyard and tables, why they couldn't just each take some instead of brawling over this particular bundle.

"I've faced armies and I've faced demons," came a voice from beside me, "but I'd resign my commission before I'd voluntarily wade into that cat-fight."

"Hello, General," I said, smiling at him. "You might want to consider recruiting some of them into the Army. I'll have to agree with you ... they're terrifying."

"If we could get them to stop fighting each other long enough to aim them at the enemy, it might be worth considering," he laughed back. "And by the way, I thought we had agreed it was 'Hugh,' not 'General,' when we talked together."

"Sorry, Hugh," I said. "Old habits are hard to break. By the way, in case it got lost in the madness, my heartiest congratulations to you both."

"And my thanks to you, Lord Skeeve," he said, giving a half bow. "We owe you much ... as individuals, as a couple, and as a kingdom."

"I just did what I could," I shrugged. "I just wish I hadn't been so clumsy about it all."

"Actually," Hugh said, "I was referring to the last several years in their entirety. Still, I see the subject is making you uncomfortable, so I'll let it drop. Friends should not make each other uncomfortable on occasions such as these."

"As a matter of fact, I'm more comfortable than I can recall ever being before," I said. "But the thought is appreciated, anyway."

"There you are! C'mere, Hot Stuff!"

Massha had come surging out of the crowd to sweep me into a gargantuan hug.

"Oh, Skeeve," she whispered, her voice much softer than her usual boisterous self. "Thank you so much. For everything. I've never been so ... oh, here I go again."

She hid her face on my shoulder as tears started to leak from her eyes.

Hugh looked at me over her shoulder and winked.

"Come, my dear," he said gently, putting a hand on her back. "We mustn't neglect our guests. They're expecting us to lead off the dancing."

"That's right," she said, straightening and dabbing at her eyes. "Don't go away, Skeeve. We want to share a drink with you before all this breaks up."

I watched as they made their way back into the crowd, and realized I was smiling.

They were both so happy they glowed. They had settled on what they wanted to do and then gone ahead and done it. No apologies, no trying to work it around other people's opinions.

Well, the truth of the matter was that I was happy now, too.

Aahz's suggestion had been right on the money. My vacation had given me the time I needed to straighten out my head and review my options. After all these years, I knew what I wanted to do.

Now it was just a matter of letting the team know at the M.Y.T.H. Inc. staff meeting tomorrow.

"So, when are the fireworks going to start?" a harsh voice demanded, interrupting my reverie.

I looked up to find a rather hefty young lady confronting me, hands on her hips and scowling.

"Fireworks?" I said. "I don't think anyone is going to get into a fight here ... unless you count that melee for the flowers a few minutes ago."

"No, I mean sky-rockets and stuff," she said. "Gandalf was famous for his fireworks displays any time he attended a party."

"I don't believe I've met the gentleman," I said. "As far as sky-rockets go, however, I don't believe there are any planned."

"I guess Robb was right," she said, pursing her lips. "You really aren't much of a magician, are you?"

This lady was starting to annoy me, but, keeping with the spirit of the occasion, I tried to be polite.

"Robb?" I said, ignoring her comment about my abilities. "The gentleman from Sherwood Arms?"

"That's right," she said. "We got to talking with him at the Tiki Lounge, and he insisted that we didn't have to worry about you as a force of evil, much less do anything about you."

"That's reassuring," I said drily.

"That being the case, I guess I should give this back to you."

Fumbling with her belt pouch, she fished out a small, cloth-wrapped bundle and thrust it at me.

"What is it?" I said, deliberately not reaching for it.

"It's the ring that sort of disappeared from your room," she said with a shrug. "Finger and all. It's just a little purple from us dropping it in Volcanos."

For a change, I knew exactly what to do ... and what not to do. What I didn't do was ask for a clarification or accept the ring.

"Actually," I said carefully, "it's not mine. It really belongs to the Queen."

"The Queen?"

"Yes. Queen Hemlock. That's her right over there," I said, pointing. "I think it would be better if you returned it to her personally. I'm sure she'll want to reward you properly."

"If you say so," she said. "Thanks for the tip."

With that, she turned on her heel and went marching off to confront the Queen.

I ran a hand across my face, hiding my smile. Yes indeed. This party was just getting better and better.

Just then, I noticed that Don Bruce was standing nearby by himself. Catching his eye, I left my wall to join him.

There were a couple of things I wanted to go over with him before tomorrow's meeting.

"I suppose you're all wondering why I asked you here."

D.MACARTHUR

Everyone was in attendance when I walked into the meeting.

Aahz was at his familiar perch in the window. Guido and Nunzio were holding down one end of the table, and Chumley and Tananda were seated next to them. Bunny was sitting a few chairs away, slightly apart from the rest of the group, her pad out and ready to take notes. The only one missing was Massha, but, under the circumstances, that was understandable. Besides, she had already told us she was resigning from M.Y.T.H. Inc., and this was a planning session for the future.

Prior to, and just after the wedding, I had had a chance to speak with a few of the team, but not all of them and not in detail. As such, there was an air of expectancy in the room. Everyone knew something was up, but nobody was sure exactly what.

I took the seat at the head of the table, and for a few moments just scanned the room, looking each of them in the eye one at a time.

"Any way you look at it," I said, finally, "it's been quite an assignment."

There were smiles and grimaces at that.

"What's more, it wasn't even a paid job. Oh, we eventually showed a healthy profit," I nodded pointedly at Aahz, "but, if you'll recall, it started out as a freebie. Specifically, I was worried about what Queen Hemlock was doing here in Possiltum but felt I had to travel to Perv to square things away with Aahz. Consequently, I asked the team to pinch hit for me. Again, not a job. Just a favor for me.