Robert Asprin - Myth-Fortunes

"No," we chorused.

"Good! Meeting adjourned." Bunny stood and adjusted her dainty jacket. "Tananda, can you give me a lift home?"

"Why not?" Tananda said. "There's a shop I want to visit near her house. The manager's really adorable." She gave a wicked smile. The two of them laughed loudly as Tananda waved a hand. They vanished with a loud bamf!

Aahz didn't say another word. He stalked off through the door of the tent, wringing out his clothes and growling to himself. I thought about catching up, but all I could do was draw attention to the accident and my part in it.

"Hey, Boss?" Guido asked. I turned to find him and Nunzio at my elbow.

"Hi, guys," I said. "Want to get some dinner? I hear there's a new Wyvern restaurant down by the grand promenade."

"Uh, maybe later, Boss."

I smiled. "You know, you don't have to call me that any more. I appreciate it, but Bunny's the boss now."

"We have infinite respect for Miss Bunny," Guido said. "However, if you would do us the favor of acceptin' our ongoin' respect, it would be a favor to us."

I was touched. "Gee, guys, I don't feel as if I really deserve

it."

"You do," Nunzio said. "It isn't as if we throw our support around to just anyone. It has and continues to be a pleasure to work with you."

"I feel the same way, guys. Thank you." They both still looked concerned. "Is there something wrong?" I asked.

"We was goin' to ask you just the same thing," Guido said. "Is there somethin' the rest of us ought to know?"

I wrinkled my forehead. "What do you mean? About what?"

Guido tilted his massive head to look at me sideways. "Okay, Boss, you don't have to go all innocent on us. Far be it from me to poke my nose into somethin' that I shouldn't. We're not tryin' to snoop into personal business. Right, Nunzio?"

"Just as you say, cousin," Nunzio agreed. I blinked.

"I think I missed something, Guido," I said, trying to force my brain to make sense of what he had just said. "Let's start over. Ask me what you want to know. I've never held back anything from you fellows. You know that."

"Dat's why we trust you," Guido agreed. "Okay, I will be more directly blunt than I originally was. For what reason did Aahz just buy himself a tomb?"

"Well, he really liked the site," I said. "You can't believe how amazing the view was from the top of that pyramid, and the workmanship that the Ghords put into each one is absolutely unbelievable. I admit, I almost got swept up in the hype, too; but I wouldn't get any real use out of one for a long time. ..." My voice trailed off. I felt as if I had just been hit by an oncoming Gargoyle. "I have no idea at all. Aahz seems fine. He never said a word to me about feeling . . . under the weather," I said weakly. "He'd tell me if he was sick, wouldn't he?"

"Maybe you're the last one," Guido said, "seein' as how you are the closest person to him that we know of, nephews and cousins notwithstandin'. I might trust Pookie, but not that Rupert, and Pookie don't exactly invite confidences from us, not even Aahz."

"That's true." I sat heavily on the footstool of one of the armchairs in the tent's vast atrium. Gleep understood my distress and came to insinuate his head underneath my palm. I stroked him. "I don't know. He didn't say anything. I mean, I haven't seen him for months. Anything could have happened in that time. When I first got back to the Bazaar not long ago, he had been home seeing his mother."

"Or so he said," Guido pointed out. "A visit to a medical professional might be somethin' he wanted to keep to himself."

My brain felt as if it was spinning. It was a lot to take in. Aahz had always been more than healthy, or so he seemed. Maybe I wouldn't know what to look for. Pervects had little in common physically with Klahds, and I was no doctor. I would have to ask around and see if he had been consulting a doctor. Chances were that he wouldn't use a physician anywhere in the notoriously porous Bazaar, where everything was for sale, even information about conversations and treatments that should remain private between a doctor and patient.

But if Aahz didn't confide in me, considering that I had been out of sight, if not out of reach, there was one person he might have. Then and there I made up my mind to do something that I had meant to do for a very long time. Now I had two reasons instead of one. I turned to the cousins.

"You've given me a lot to think about. In the meanwhile, I've got a favor to ask."

"Anythin', Boss," Guido said. "You don't even haveta ask."

"It's just a little piece of information. Nunzio, you know more about the inns and restaurants in the Bazaar. Let me get your opinion. ..."

I left Gleep in the office with very specific instructions and ran out to take care of two errands.

When I returned, my dragon was on his back in the middle of the floor, eyes slitted, crooning, as Tananda ran her fingertips up and down his belly.

"Hi, tiger," Tananda said. "I jumped back here after I dropped Bunny in Klah. Gleep kept circling around me every time I headed for the door. He didn't want me to leave. I've got to check in with a client in the Fleeced Customer Inn."

"Sorry," I said. "That was my doing. I wanted just a minute to speak with you without any of the others

around. Do you mind?"

"Not at all," the Trollop said, smiling up at me. Gleep let out a moan redolent with sulfur fumes that made us both cough. "What's on your mind?"

"I, uh . . . " Now that the moment was upon me, I could hardly force myself to talk. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything," she said. She leaned forward. The action shifted her generous decollete forward against the low-cut green deerskin top she was wearing, causing a change in the garment's geometry that made my blood pressure shoot through the roof. "What can I do for you?"

"Well..." I swallowed nervously and ran a finger around the inside of my collar. Before I could corral them and let them out of the paddock one at a time, my words rushed out of my mouth all at once. "I was wondering if you would go out to dinner with me. Tomorrow. Or the day after. Whenever. I mean, if you would like to."

Tananda looked taken aback, as I was afraid she might be. Then she realized she might have hurt my feelings and brought her face under control.

"You'd like me to go out with you?"

"I really would," I said. I pulled myself together and remembered the speech I had memorized. "I mean, if you would do me the honor of having dinner with me, I'd consider it a big favor."

She tilted her head as if trying to figure out if I was joking. I gave her my most sincere, open expression. She smiled at me. "It would be a pleasure. Tomorrow evening is fine."

"That's great!" I said. "Okay. I've heard of this great restaurant about six miles from here on the edge of the Home Entertainment zone. Say about seven o'clock or so? I'll make a reservation."

"Great," Tananda said. "Formal? Informal? What's the dress code?"

I was the wrong person to ask about clothes, no matter how long Bunny had been teaching me the ins and outs of fashion. "Uh, kind of nice, I guess. Not wedding-reception nice, but not just drop in off the street nice. That's what it looked like when I checked the place out."

"Seven o'clock, then," she said. "I'd better get back to this. The client's expecting it by close of business. It's an unexpected invitation, tiger, but it'll be nice. Thanks." She clamped me in a solid kiss, then undulated out the door.

I recovered enough to say thanks as the tent flap dropped.

Gleep popped up and laved my face with his tongue. I nearly gagged at the smell of his slime, though I appreciated the gesture.

"Good . . . idea," he said.

Did I mention that my dragon can talk? When I told Guido that I don't hold back anything from my colleagues, that wasn't completely true. Gleep's ability to speak was one thing that he and I kept between us. I hadn't even known at first how long it took baby dragons to become verbal, and considering how often he was underfoot, it might become awkward if I let it be known now. Someday, though, we'd let everyone know.