Zach Hughes - Pressure Man

Earth was thirty degrees high, and to see all of her they sat side by side, facing the viewport, silent, the music soft and nostalgic. Dom had never felt better. The ship was coming along. The steak had been delicious. The brandy was one of the better synthetics. Doris leaned back, the long line of her throat a delicate curve. Her hair fell into sort of a frame for her face. She was wearing the short uniform. Her long legs were tanned by hours in the exercise room. She swung her crossed leg in time with the music.

There was something about the music which was very familiar, and they both noticed it at once. She had been humming quietly, now and then voicing a phrase, and he was aware of her as a woman. He had to clear his throat and look away.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve heard that one,” she said, as the song ended. It had been their song. They’d danced to it many times during the Academy days.

He stood. He had to move or he’d do something which they’d both regret. He stood beside the port, and Doris came to him. As she passed the player she turned the volume up slightly. Another old, familiar song was playing. He sensed her nearness, felt her brush against him.

“We danced a lot to that one, too,” she said musingly.

He looked down at her. Was it possible that she felt the same thing he felt? She was humming again, swaying her body to the music, looking up and out to peaceful-looking old Earth up there in the sky.

The music changed to upbeat. “Hey. I can’t stand that,” she said putting down her glass. She took Dom’s glass and put it down and lifted her arms. He took her hand and began to dance. He got the feel of it after a few steps and they reminded each other of the old steps, laughing as it came back. Fads in music and dancing changed so fast that Dom couldn’t always remember which type of dance went with which, but Doris was an authority.

The music went soft and slow. Dom felt the warning bells go off as she came into his arms, put her cheek to his, and began to dance, close, dreamy. She was a perfect fit, almost as tall as he, a size to cuddle in his arms. He had to remind himself that women looked on dancing as something almost impersonal. To Dom, slow dancing was hugging set to music. Women seemed to attach less sexual significance to dancing, but to Dom body to body while swaying with the music was just as thrilling as body to body under any other circumstance. Ah, she was good in his arms, and he didn’t turn loose as one song ended and another began. He turned his head slightly and kissed the smooth, soft curve of her neck. She sighed.

It seemed to happen naturally. Lips to lips, they stopped dancing and the kiss went on for eternity and there was promise in her response. He had wanted that kiss for so long, dreaming of it for all of the long years since he said goodbye to her and went off on his first trip to Mars.

“Stay down,” Larry yelled, bending quickly to trigger the detonator.

Dom broke the kiss, pushing her away. “I’m sorry,” he said. “Earth got in my eyes.”

“I know,” she whispered, leaning toward him. “I wanted you to kiss me.”

His heart leaped. He moved toward her. She put her hands on his chest. He looked into her eyes in question.

“I’m not saying no,” she said. She looked away, biting the corner of her lower lip in thought. “I want to be sure to say this right. First, it’s been a long, long time since you kissed me like that, and I liked it very much.”

“I hated it.” He grinned.

“But I think you were feeling the same thing I can’t help feeling when you pushed me away,” she said.

“I was thinking about Larry,” he admitted.

“Yes,” she said.

He turned to face the port and watched a surface crawler moving across his field of vision. He was still thinking about Larry. He tried to view the situation from Larry’s viewpoint, thinking of him as being out there, somewhere, able to look back and see what was happening. Problem: a young widow. Solution: a man, but not just any man, a man who would love her and cherish her. He turned to look down at Doris’ profile.

“Would you think I was being silly as hell if I said I think Larry would approve?” he asked.

“No,” she said. “He knew about you. If he was ever jealous of my, uh, having given myself to you first, he never said so.”

“I’d like to know what you think,” he said.

“I’ve been intimate with two men in my life,” Doris said. “And I loved you with a big love once, damn you.”

“I’ve loved you since the first time I saw you,” he said.

“But you loved space more.”

“Guilty, I suppose. I’m older now. We’re together.”

“There’s that to think about,” she said. “We’ve got a job ahead of us. We’re going to be in crowded quarters for months with others.”

“There is that,” he said.

“The lady is not saying no,” she said.

“Just wait a while,” he said. “We could get married.”

“We could.”

“But you’re not so sure?” he asked.

She sighed. “I feel like a silly and indecisive teenager.”

“Can you love me, again?”

“Oh, I’ve always loved you, too. As a young girl loves in the deepness of first love, as a sister loves, as a friend loves.”

“That wasn’t a friend or a sister kissing me a few minutes ago,” Dom said.

She laughed. “Dom, if you want to make love to me you’ll find a most willing participant.” She looked him straight in the eyes. “Do you want to?”

“Yes.” He shrugged. “All right, dammit, you must have infused me with your middle-class morality and your sense of responsibility. You are infuriatingly right and I hate you, you smart-assed female.”

“There will be time,” she said. “When we get back from Jupiter.”

“Years and years,” he said, kissing her lightly and pushing her away as she went molten in his arms.

Within twenty-four hours he was on a shuttle. He carried with him sworn depositions from Art and Doris, who could not be spared from the Kennedy project. Neil was supervising in-place static tests of electrical systems and the power plant. He resented being pulled away, leaving the team working, but he went down, roaring into the muggy atmosphere, noting double security at the Cape. He flew a carefully guarded jet to Washington.

The hearing was held deep inside the main DOSE installation outside the city. Dom made his statement and answered questions. Nothing new came out of the piles of paper which were the result of the hearing. However, Dom was reminded of the ability of the Firsters to penetrate the most secure installations.

Since all of the inside team of terrorists had been killed, there were unanswered questions. No one could suggest how the explosives were smuggled into DOSEWEX. It was possible that the traitor space marines could have done it, or one or more of the technicians who were Firsters.

J.J. expressed the doubt. “We are reluctant to admit that there might be high-level traitors among us. You and I, Dom, are more or less sensible men. We can think that it took someone with more clout than techs or marines to place so many Firsters on your lab team.”

“It was your office which cleared each one of them,” Dom said. They were having a meal in a secure hotel while Dom waited for a flight back to the Cape.

“My office,” J.J. said, “consists of more than just a room. It involves a couple of hundred people. They’ve all been investigated backward and forward, and I wouldn’t bet my life on the loyalty of more than a handful of them. Some minor clerk somewhere could influence a screening with a deft shuffling of papers. Someone in higher authority could bring pressure on people elsewhere to get a particular man into DOSEWEX. Personally, I don’t think the raid on the computer could have been planned without someone of at least administrative rank pulling strings, and that opens such a vast array of possibilities that I don’t dare start an investigation. One thing for damned sure, we’re going to have to be one hundred percent sure of every person aboard the Kennedy .”