Gordon Dickson - The Human Edge

“Including you and your people?”

“Of course. Love your nightmares. They will make you well. They will make the little bit of proper life in you grow, and heal you.”

Ben snorted beside Jerry. Jerry could sympathize with the other man. The nightmares he had been having during his scant hours of sleep, the past two weeks, came back to his mind, with the indescribably alien, terrifying sensation of drifting in a sort of environmental soup with identifiable things changing shape and identity constantly around him. Even pumped full of tranquilizers, he thought—which reminded Jerry.

He had not taken his tranquilizers lately.

When had he taken some last? Not since he woke up, in any case. Not since… yesterday, sometime. Though that was now hard to believe.

“Let’s forget that, too, then,” Milt was saying. “Now, the jungle is growing all over our ship, in spite of all we can do. You tell me your people can make the jungle do anything you want.”

“Yes, yes,” said Communicator agreeably.

“Then, will you please stop it from growing all over our spaceship?”

“We understand. It is your sickness, the poison that makes you say this. Do not fear. We will never abandon you.” Communicator looked almost ready to pat Milt consolingly on the head. “You are people, who are more important than any cost. Soon you will grow and cast off your poisoned part and come to us.”

“But we can come to you right now!” said Milt, between his teeth. “In fact—we’ve come to your village a dozen times.”

“No, no.” Communicator sounded distressed. “You approach, but you do not come. You have never come to us.”

Milt wiped his forehead with the back of a wide hand. “I will come back to your village now, with you,” he said. “Would you like that?” he asked.

“I would be so happy!” said Communicator. “But—you will not come. You say it, but you do not come.”

“All right. Wait—” About to take a hand transceiver from the console, Milt saw the other two men. “Jerry,” he said, “you go this time. Maybe he’ll believe it if it’s you who goes to the village with him.”

“I’ve been there before. With you, the second time you went,” objected Jerry. “And I’ve got to feed the men in restraint, pretty soon,” he added.

“Try going again. That’s all we can do—try things. Ben and I’ll feed the men,” said Milt. Jerry, about to argue further, felt the pressure of a sudden wordless, exhausted appeal from Milt. Milt’s basic berserkedness must be just about ready to break loose, too, he realized.

“All right,” said Jerry.

“Good,” said Milt, looking grateful. “We have to keep trying. I should have lifted ship while I still had five well men to lift it with. Come on, Ben—you and I better go feed those men now, before we fall asleep on our feet.”

They went away around the nose of the ship. Jerry unhooked the little black-and-white transceiver that would radio-relay his conversations with Communicator back to the console of the translator for sense-making during the trip.

“Come on,” he said to Communicator, and led off down the pleasantly wide jungle trail toward the native village.

They passed from under the little patch of open sky above the clearing and into green-roofed stillness. All about them, massive limbs, branches, ferns, and vines intertwined in a majestic maze of growing things. Small flying creatures, looking half-animal and half-insect, flittered among the branches overhead. Some larger, more animallike creatures sat on the heavier limbs and moaned off-key like abandoned puppies. Jerry’s head spun with his weariness, and the green over his head seemed to close down on him like a net flung by some giant, crazy fisherman, to take him captive.

He was suddenly and bitterly reminded of the Team’s high hopes, the day they had set down on this world. No other Team or Group had yet to turn up any kind of alien life much more intelligent than an anthropoid ape. Now they, Team 529, had not only uncovered an intelligent, evidently semi-cultured alien people, but an alien people eager to establish relations with the humans and communicate. Here, two weeks later, the natives were still apparently just as eager to communicate, but what they said made no sense.

Nor did it help that, with the greatest of patience and kindness, Communicator and his kind seemed to consider that it was the humans who were irrational and uncommunicative.

Nor that, meanwhile, the jungle seemed to be mounting a specifically directed attack on the human spaceship.

Nor that the nightmare afflicting the humans had already laid low eight of the twelve crew and were grinding the four left on their feet down to a choice between suicidal delirium or collapse from exhaustion.

It was a miracle, thought Jerry, lightheadedly trudging through the jungle, that the four of them had been able to survive as long as they had. A miracle based probably on some individual chance peculiarity of strength that the other eight men in straitjackets lacked. Although, thought Jerry now, that strength that they had so far defied analysis. Dizzily, like a man in a high fever, he considered their four surviving personalities in his mind’s eye. They were, he thought, the four men of the team with what you might call the biggest mental crotchets.

—or ornery streaks.

Take the fourth member of the group—the medician, Arthyr Loy, who had barely stuck his nose out of the sick-bay lab in the last forty-eight hours. Not only because he was the closest thing to an M.D. aboard the ship was Art still determined to put the eight restrained men back on their feet again. It just happened, in addition, that Art considered himself the only true professional man aboard, and was not the kind to admit any inability to the lesser mortals about him.

And Milt Johnson—Milt made an excellent captain. He was a tower of strength, a great man for making decisions. The only thing was, that having decided, Milt could hardly be brought to consider the remote possibility that anyone else might have wanted to decide differently.

Ben Akham was another matter. Ben hated religion and loved machinery—and the jungle surrounding was attacking his spaceship. In fact, Jerry was willing to bet that by the time he got back, Ben would be washing the hull with an acid-counteractant in spite of what he had told Jerry earlier.

And himself? Jerry? Jerry shook his head woozily. It was hard to be self-analytical after ten days of three and four hours sleep per twenty. He had what his grandmother had once described as the curse of the Gael—black stubbornness and red rages.

All of these traits, in all four of them, had normally been buried safely below the surfaces of their personalities and had only colored them as individuals. But now, the last two weeks had worn those surfaces down to basic personality bedrock. Jerry shoved the thought out of his mind.

“Well,” he said, turning to Communicator, “we’re almost to your village now…. You can’t say someone didn’t come with you, this time.”

Communicator gabbled. The transceiver in Jerry’s hand translated.

“Alas,” the native said, “but you are not with me.”

“Cut it out!” said Jerry wearily. “I’m right here beside you.”

“No,” said Communicator. “You accompany me, but you are not here. You are back with your dead things.”

“You mean the ship, and the rest of it?” asked Jerry.

“There is no ship,” said Communicator. “A ship must have grown and been alive. Your thing has always been dead. But we will save you.”

They came out of the path at last into a clearing dotted with whitish, pumpkinlike shells some ten feet in height above the brown earth in which they were half-buried. Wide cracks in the out-curving sides gave view of tangled roots and plants inside, among which other natives could be seen moving about, scratching, tasting, and making holes in the vegetable surfaces.