Terry Bisson: The Fifth Element

Her lovely features screwed tight with supreme concentration as she gripped the beam of light in her hands—

And it became solid!

She shattered it, freeing her wrist.

Then, using the beam as a battering ram, she knocked a hole in the ceiling.

She jumped up and grabbed the edge of the hole, then pulled herself through, into the crawl space.

And was gone.

Cornelius ran across the Security Chiefs office toward the closet.

He opened the closet door.

There was the Chief, bound and gagged, where the priest had left him.

“Mangalores!” said Cornelius breathlessly. “In the Diva’s suite! They want the Sacred Stones! We must stop them!”

“Mmmm!” said the Chief through the duct tape that bound his mouth.

He held up his hands, tied with his own necktie Cornelius bent down and started tugging at the knot.

“I’m going to free you, but you must promise to help me!”

The Chief nodded his agreement.

He kept his hands together so that Cornelius wouldn’t notice that his fingers were crossed

“I have it!”

The Mangalore looked up in triumph from the suitcase he was ripping apart. On the him, the Diva’s manager lay in a pool

The Mangalore warriors had totally trashed the Diva’s stateroom, looking for the Sacred Stones.

And now, at last, success!

The lucky Mangalore warrior held up a gold and ivory box, engraved with icons of the four elements—earth, air, fire and water.

He was just about to open it when he heard a commotion above him.

Another Element—this one dedicated to life and peace—was descending from a hole she had ripped in the ceiling panels with one mighty sweep of her delicate hand.

“Apipoulai!” Leeloo said, as she dropped into the stateroom like an avenging angel.

At that precise moment, the Diva Plavalaguna changed both the key and tempo of her song.

Her soaring sonata segued into a funky dance number, picking up the beat and rocking the house.

One of the Managalore warriors whipped out a knife.

A big knife; a giant knife; a monster knife. He moved on Leeloo.

She disarmed and disabled him with one elegantly graceful (but intensely painful) kick. The other Mangalores moved in, armed with knives.

Leeloo kicked.

OOOMPH!

Leeloo spun.

AARRGH!

Her kicks and spins became a dance, matching the Diva’s rocking beat, and the Managalores fell back, one by one, bloodied and broken.

More Mangalores moved in.

But the music picked up the tempo again, and Leeloo became a whirling dervish, smashing Mangalores against the walls.

In the Concert Hall, the Diva finished her song, and bowed to thunderous applause.

The house was on its feet.

At that exact moment, Leeloo also finished— and bowed ironically to the pitiful groans of the mangled Mangalores lying in heaps around the Diva’s demolished stateroom.

The house was on the floor.

But one Mangalore warrior had escaped.

He slipped out the door and ran down the corridor, toward the Concert Hall.

He found Akanit and his warriors standing emotionless in the lobby outside the Concert Hall. Even they had been transfixed by the Diva’s

“It was an ambush!” the escaped Mangalore whispered into Akanit’s drooping, doglike ear.

Akanit heard the story and his already deformed face grew even more monstrous with rage. |

“If it’s war they want, it’s war they’ll get! ”

He nodded to his hideous warriors.

“Lock and load!”

They cocked their ZFls.

Cornelius and the Security Chief entered Fhloston Paradise’s Central Security Station together.

“You promised!” complained Father. Cornelius, who was leading the way—in handcuffs.

§ The Chief was behind him, holding a gun.

“I had my fingers crossed,” said the Chief.

Leeloo picked up the gold and ivory box from the floor where the Mangalore had dropped it.

Her eyes brightened when she saw the engraved icons of the four elements.

She was just about to open it—

When the door to the stateroom burst open! Zorg stood in the doorway, holding a ZF1.

“My compliments, little lady!” he said, his eyes quickly scanning the chaotic scene. Thank you for doing all the dirty work. I couldn’t have done better myself!”

His voice grew cold and the ZF1 hummed nastily.

“Now hand over the stones.”

Leeloo smiled and tossed the box to Zorg. Zorg fumbled, barely catching it—

And when he looked back, he saw Leeloo leaping high into the air. With one Olympic-class flip, she disappeared into the hole from which she had descended.

Furious, Zorg sprayed the ceiling with fire. Bratbratbrat!

The crawl space was dark, but the bullets raining through opened little points of light, like stars. Bratbratbrat! Bratbratbrat!

Leeloo danced from side to side, avoiding the bullets as she ran.

Bratbratbrat! Bratbratbrat! Bratbratbrat!

Zorg emptied his clip.

Bratbratbrat! Bratbratbrat! Bratbratbrat!

The door to the Central Security Station exploded inward, riddled with bullets.

A dozen Mangalores rushed in, firing their ZF1s.

“Nobody move!” growled Akanit. “We’re taking over this ship!”

The Security Chief hit the floor, Cornelus beside him.

“I hate to say ‘I told you,’” said Cornelius. “But I told you!”

Fog had stationed himself at the rear of the Concert Hall, where he could watch everything and still pear the Diva Plavalaguna’s magnificent song.

And a magnificent song it was.

She was taking her tenth curtain call and he was applauding wildly with the rest of the crowd, when— WHAP!

The door from the lobby flew open, knocking Inn off his feet and rattling all his dangling devices, Three Mangalores rushed into the Concert Hall. “Everybody down!” they shouted.

Then they started shooting, Bratbratbrat!Bratbratbrat!Bratbratbrat! The general alarm went off:

RAREARAREARAREA!

Zorg tossed away his empty clip. He was just about to reload his ZF1, when he heard a distant alarm RAREARAREARAREA!

The general alarm!

“I know this music,” he said, chuckling to him-

He loved chaos and confusion; and he knew how to add to it!

Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a small

cylindrical device.

A mini-nuke.

“Let’s change the beat!” he said.

He stuck the bomb to the wall and flicked a tiny switch.

The timer started counting down.

30:00

29:59

With a sick, triumphant smile, Zorg put the gold and ivory box under his arm and ran out of the stateroom.

“Ladies and gentlemen!!” Loc Rhod shouted into his hovering skeeter-mike. “Something’s happening here!! I think we are being attacked!!”

“No shit,” Korben muttered softly.

Bratbratbrat! Bratbratbrat! Bratbratbrat! “The Concert Hall is crawling with armed aliens!” cried the excited DJ.

BuddhabuddhaBuddbabuddhaBuddbabuddhat! Fog’s security guards were firing back. Fog himself staggered to his feet, cuffs and chains clanking, and reached for his gun.

It was not in his holster!

He spotted it on the floor where it had fallen and dove for it.

He pulled the trigger.

Clikclikclik —

Jammed!

Fog stood up, trying to unjam his gun,when the Mangalores spotted his badge (or badges) and Bred.

Bratbratbrat!Bratbratbrat!Bratbratbrat!

The fusillade sent him diving through an access-door into a small storage room.

Bratbratbrat! Bratbratbrat!

BuddhabuddbaBuddhabuddha! Korben scanned the Concert Hall, trying to figure out which force was firing at whom.