Gord Zajac - Major Karnage

Karnage nodded. “Howdy.”

The man ignored him. He turned his gaze back to the screen. The steel doors opened, and a young woman emerged from the darkness.

Miki’s voice poured from the screen. “And now here’s Stephanie Blyskosz, readying for her meeting with The Worm.”

The doors shut behind Stephanie with a loud boom. She jumped, then put on a brave face. She waved to the stands. The crowd cheered.

Paco’s voice joined Miki’s. “Stephanie was our highest scoring female contestant this year, as well as the highest scoring on record.”

A giant shadow overtook her. She looked up. Her eyes went wide and she screamed. The video cut out as an angry, squiggly screech shook the entire complex. As the screech faded, the video signal came back. Stephanie was gone. Nothing but churned earth remained at the base of the doors. The crowd cheered wildly.

The young man snorted and shook his head in disgust. “Pathetic.”

The screen changed to show Miki and Paco standing on the arena floor, wearing headsets and holding clipboards.

“I think she just set a new record,” Miki looked at his clipboard, “for the shortest-lived contestant, lasting for a grand total of five point six seconds.”

“I thought for sure she’d last longer than that,” Paco said.

“As I think everybody did. But, as always, The Worm has the Final Word.”

“Mama-oo-pow-pow, Miki. Mama-oo-pow-pow.” Paco turned to the camera. “We’ll be back after this.”

The screen changed to a shot of Melvern staring into the distance, as his voice-over extolled the virtues of a life dedicated to Spragmos. The young man finally looked away from the screen. He stood and faced Karnage. A Worm-shaped nametag stuck to his shirt proclaimed him to be Ajay. He looked Karnage up and down. “So, you think you’re Worthy, do you?”

“I’m the Lightbringer,” Karnage said.

“Yes,” Ajay nodded at the screen. “I saw your little performance.”

Karnage nodded at the body near Ajay’s feet. “What happened to your friend there?”

Ajay barely glanced at the corpse. “He dared to question The Word. And Spragmos judged him accordingly.”

“Spragmos killed him?”

“No,” Ajay said. “I did.”

“Does that make you Spragmos?”

Ajay smiled. “You mock me.”

“I do,” Karnage said.

Ajay shook his head. “I pity you. Your Worm lies in a deep slumber. I can sense it. One wonders if it will ever waken.”

“And your Worm’s awake, is it?”

“It is. Thanks to Andy.” Ajay looked down at the corpse and smiled. “Spragmos had a role for him to play. He was sent here to test my faith. To try and fill my head with lies and doubt. But I have passed this test. Walked through the fire as Spragmos decreed and emerged reborn. My Worm is truly awake now. And Spragmos will judge me Worthy.” He puffed out his chest. “For I am the real Lightbringer.”

“No you’re not,” Karnage said.

“I am,” Ajay said.

“I’m the Lightbringer,” Karnage said.

“No! I am the Lightbringer!”

“Just cuz you say it’s so don’t make it true,” Karnage said.

Ajay bared his teeth. He looked as if he were about to attack Karnage. Karnage hoped he would.

The door to the Green Room opened behind them. Homski stuck his head into the room. “Ajay? It is your time.”

Ajay closed his eyes and let out a deep breath. He opened his eyes and smiled at Karnage. “You are not Worthy. Spragmos calls for me now. I go to become one with The Worm. And once He has judged me Worthy, it will be your turn to meet your fate.”

Ajay turned and left. The door slammed shut behind him.

Karnage had barely sat down before the door opened again and Tristan sashayed into the room.

“Oh good, you’re still here,” she said.

Karnage sprang to his feet. “How the hell did you get in here?”

“Keep your voice down,” Tristan hissed. “If I’m caught in here, it’s the end for us both.”

“As opposed to just me?”

“What ever are you talking about?”

“Do I look like a Messiah to you? Your plan didn’t work. Melvern saw right through it!”

“On the contrary,” Tristan said. “He played right into it.”

Karnage scowled. “What do you mean he played right into it?”

Tristan looked at him and blinked. “You mean you didn’t think I knew this would happen?”

“Of course I didn’t think that! What the hell was I supposed to think?!”

“Admittedly, that was exactly what you were supposed to think. But once things didn’t go as planned, I thought for sure you would have assumed that I was playing a deeper, more Machiavellian game here. Frankly, my good Major, I’m a little disappointed in you.”

“Disappointed in me?! Goddammit, I thought you were bein’ straight with me!”

“I was straight with you. I said that so long as you do as I tell you, you will make it out of this alive. You’re still alive, aren’t you? Have some faith, Major.”

“Faith?! You set me up!”

“I did nothing of the sort.”

“You could have warned me this was gonna happen.”

“And risk compromising your performance? I think not.”

“My performance?!”

“The camera doesn’t lie, Major. I needed to ensure you were authentic. And what better way to ensure an authentic performance than if you are simply being authentic. That Melvern is a snake. If I had told you the entire plan, he would have sensed something was up right from the start, and you would have ended up as worm food.”

“It sounds like they’re gonna make worm food outta me anyway!”

“Ah, but the difference is context, my good Major. Before, you were just worm food. Now, you are worm food with upward mobility! You have now been declared Worthy. That makes you a serious contender for Melvern’s job. All you have to do is defeat The Worm, and Melvern will have no choice but to accept you as the Lightbringer.”

“And how the hell do I defeat The Worm?”

Tristan smiled. “My dear Major, have you never wondered why Melvern has not fed me to The Worm? He’s afraid that I’ve discovered his secret. That I know how to defeat The Worm.”

“And do you?”

“Of course I do. We wouldn’t be here if I didn’t. Honestly, Major, I had you pegged for a better strategist than this. Do try to keep up, please.”

“Fine. How do I defeat The Worm?”

“Ah,” Tristan smiled. “Killing The Worm is both simple and complex. You must break off its horn.”

“That’s it? That’s all it takes?”

“Trust me. It’s enough.”

“What’s the catch?”

“The Worm is big.”

“Okay.”

“I mean big.”

“Okay.”

“Really, really big.”

“I get the picture.”

“No,” Tristan said. “You don’t.”

The screen above them changed to show Miki and Paco back in the arena. “Welcome back to Arbiter’s Day, folks. We’re coming to the end of the Finale, and have we ever saved the best for last.”

“We just got word that Andy Rudyk passed peacefully while waiting in the Green Room.”

“Apparently the mighty Spragmos was keen to ensure our Top Ten stayed a Top Ten, Paco.”

“Papa-oo-mow-mow, Miki. Papa-oo-mow-mow.”

The shot changed to show the arena. The doors opened, and Ajay emerged from the darkness.

“And now here’s audience favourite, Ajay Joseph entering the ring.”

The doors slammed shut behind him. He didn’t even flinch.

“No one has ever scored as highly as Ajay did in the preliminaries, Miki.”

He turned to the crowd and threw his fists into the air.

“Listen to those fans. The crowd really loves him.”

A shadow loomed up over him. A squiggly screech pierced the monitor’s speakers, and shook the arena right down to the Green Room. The monitor screeched out, and when it came back again, Ajay was gone: nothing but a greasy smear left to mark where he had been. The crowd let out a gasp, then a cheer.