Claire Adrian - Incest, A Way Of Life

We cannot pass over this lightly, as a girl's guilt toward her father does not interfere merely with her sexual life (perhaps even to the extent of frigidity-or female homosexuality) but extends to her achievements in other fields if they take on an unconscious phallic significance. Inhibition related to this guilt seems to me chiefly responsible for woman's place in culture and society today. Psychoanalysts have noticed that Oedipal guilt, linked to the guilt of surpassing the mother, is associated in many intellectual, professional, and creative activities with a feeling of guilt toward the father, a guilt which is specifically feminine. Indeed, it has been found that in patients suffering from chronic headaches their guilt over surpassing their parents on an intellectual level was usually linked to the father, particularly in female patients. For both sexes successful intellectual activity is the unconscious equivalent of possessing the penis. For women this means they have the father's penis and have thus dispossessed the mother-the Oedipal drama. In addition, they have also castrated the father.

But only very rarely does the Electra complex lead its possessor to consciously desiring sexual contact with the parent. And when it does? Then we have a girl or woman who becomes utterly ruthless in her desire to have contact not with a sexual father-figure but with the father himself.

This is precisely what happened in the case of Paula T-.

You may wonder how I intended to go about seducing my stepfather. I wondered, too! I wondered quite a bit, until I began to think very seriously about the problem. After a good deal of analyzing, I suddenly realized that all I would have to do was make myself available and catch Ju-Ju at just the right moment, when mother wasn't around. I suppose that's silly to say that-about mother, I mean. He, could hardly screw me while she was present, could he? I'd just have to wait and pick the right moment. I had no choice. I could hardly walk up to my stepfather and say, 'Gee, gosh, dear old Dad. I sure wish you'd stick your in me!'

"Naturally, I knew I'd need a lot of good old-fashioned luck, in spite of my awareness that I had something else going for me-pure sex! Instinctively, I realized that any normal man could not help but be attracted, sexually, to a good-looking, shaped-up teenage girl. I'm not saying that a normal man goes out looking for a young pussy to fuck; I'm just saying that he'd like to.

"That's where parents goof about their teenage daughters: they think the sweet young things don't have any sexual feelings! HA! Take me, for instance! While I always acted like a superdedicated vestal virgin around my parents, I never missed for a moment the way my stepfather sometimes looked at me, the longing he had in his eyes, the way his hot gaze undressed me and roamed hungrily over my body. Often I wanted to laugh out loud when I thought of how 'immature' mother and Ju-Ju considered me, and reflected on how he often looked at me.

"I suppose I am making my stepfather look like a dirty old man. I don't mean to, and I don't want you to get the impression that he leered after me or was the kind of father who tried to get in his ‘feelies' when mother wasn't looking. It was just the exact opposite. Why, I don't think the poor man was.even conscious of how he looked at me, nor realized that he had the hots for me. Oh, I suppose he knew, in the sense that he was aware of my sexual attractiveness; but I don't think he ever toyed with the idea of doing anything. That sort of worried me! For my purpose, it would have been easier if he had wanted to screw me. But because he didn't, or rather, because he wasn't doing anything about it, I knew I would have to make his desire for me overpower his conscience.

"My chance came sooner than I had expected-one Saturday afternoon in July, when I was sunbathing in a bikini in the backyard. Mother had left that morning to work in the bakery, which was not the usual procedure for her* because Saturday was her day off. But another employee was sick, and mother had to work in her place. That's why I was wearing my bikini, because mother, not being at home, could not disapprove.

"My stepfather had also left earlier in the day, to see about a job with a construction company which was laying a pipeline on the edge of town. Ju-Ju came home that afternoon, about two; and when I rushed into the house-thinking that now was my chance, since mother was away-I saw immediately, to my surprise, that he had been drinking. Ordinarily, my stepfather was not a drinking man, but as he explained, he had gotten the job and had stopped at a bar to celebrate-not that he was stoned, only feeling no pain.

"Exuberantly, I flung myself against him, pressing my breasts and loins firmly against him, knowing what my action had to trigger in him.

" ‘Oh, Ju-Ju,' I cooed in my professional virgin's voice. ‘I'm so happy you got the job. But you've been drinking, and mother won't like that.'

"He smiled crazily, and his arms went out as if to encircle me; then he stopped, as if remembering that I was eighty percent naked, with only a thin bit of cloth across my tits and nothing more than what amounted to a small handkerchief covering my pussy and rear.

" ‘I've-I've brought you a present,' Ju-Ju said, stepping back, reaching into his pocket, and handing me a small gift-wrapped package. The gift was only a cheap bead necklace, but I was overjoyed with it-loving him all the more for his thoughtful ness. I saw his eyes dart to my breasts, then to my belly, then on down to my legs, and I knew I had his juices boiling, I also knew I'd have to initiate the action, if there was going to be any. I knew I had him going, could tell from the way he breathed and from the way his cock was beginning to bulge through his pants. And it was plain to see that his face was burning hotly from heat-and I don't mean from the July temperature either! It was also obvious that he was on the verge of taking me into his arms!

"'Thank you for the gift,' I purred. "It's a fine necklace and I'll keep it as long as I live. Honest I will,' Looking directly into his eyes, I added softly. 'You're such a wonderful man. You're so good to me. I only wish I could do something-something very special- in return.'

"Ju-Ju averted his eyes from mine and swallowed uncomfortably. It seemed to me that he didn't know what to do with his hands. He said in a strained voice. 'Yes. Well, I-I had thought of getting you a new LF or perhaps a good book, one we could both read, but I didn't have the money, and… ‘

"'Why don't you pretend I'm a book, Ju-Ju,' I said throatily, looking directly at him. Til bet you'd do a marvelous job reading me. I just know you'd not skip any of the words, and do a real neat job on the fine print.'

"My poor stepfather! He looked as if he were fighting a desperate battle within himself, a fight he had to lose, either way. If he fucked me, his conscience would lose. If he didn't, his prick would go down in defeat.

"Deliberately, I dropped the necklace to the floor, and when Ju-Ju stopped to pick it up, I unfastened the lower part of my bikini and let it drop to my feet, saying sexily, 'Why don't you wet your finger and begin turning the pages?'

"That did it! Conscience lost the battle, and my poor, darling stepfather could no longer resist. Breathing heavily, he stared at my cunt; then, without a word, and beginning at my ankles, he ran his fingers slowly but quite firmly upward, to my knees, up to the outside of my thighs, and on to the starting flare of my butt. Then down to the inside of my thighs, until his thumbs made contact with the little fat lobes of my cunt lips. Spreading my legs slightly, I sighed faintly and a quick tremor ran through me, then a tremendous shiver as his finger slipped into my pussy and began probing.