Frank Harris - My Life and Loves, Book 1

«I like you, Sophy,» I said, «but anyone would have done as much for your mother as I did. She was ill!» «Hoo!» she snorted indignantly. «Most white folk would have let her die right there on the stairs. I know them: they'd have been angry with her for groaning.

I hate 'em!» And her great eyes glowered. She came over to me in a flash: «If you'd been an American, I could never have come to you, never! I'd rather have died, or saved and stole and paid you-» the scorn in her voice was bitter with hate: evidently the Negro question had a side I had never realized. «But you're different,» she went on, «an' I just came-» and she paused, lifting her great eyes to mine with an unspoken offer in their lingering regard. «I'm glad,» I said lamely, staving off the temptation, «and I hope you'll come again soon and we'll be great friends-eh, Sophy?» and I held out my hand smiling; but she pouted and looked at me with reproach or appeal or disappointment in her eyes. I could not resist: I took her hand and drew her to me and kissed her on the lips, slipping my right hand the while up to her left breast. It was as firm as India rubber: at once I felt my sex stand up and throb: resolve and desire fought in me, but I was accustomed to make my will supreme. «You are the loveliest girl in Lawrence,» I said, «but I must really go now. I have an appointment and I'm late.» She smiled enigmatically as I seized my hat and went, not stopping even to shut or lock the office door. As I walked up the street, my thoughts and feelings were all in a whirl. «Did I want her? Should I have her? Would she come again? «Oh, Hell! women are the very devil and he's not so black as he's painted! Black?» That night I was awakened by a loud knocking at my office door; I sprang up and opened without thinking and at once Sophy came in laughing. ^"What is it?» I cried, half asleep still. «I'se tired waiting,» she answered cheekily, «and anyways I just came.» I was about to remonstrate with her when she cried: «You go right to bed,» and she took my head in her hands and kissed me. My wish to resist died out of me. «Come quickly!» I said, getting into bed and watching her as she stripped. In a hand's turn she had undressed to her chemise. «I reckon this'll do,» she said coquettishly. «Please take it off,» I cried, and the next moment she was in my arms naked. As I touched her sex, she wound her arms round my neck and kissed me greedily with hot lips. To my astonishment her sex was well formed and very small: I had always heard that Negroes had far larger genitals than white people; but the lips of Sophy's sex were thick and firm. «Have you ever been had, Sophy?» I asked. «No, sir!» she replied. «I liked you because you never came after me and you was so kind and I thot that I'd be sure to do it sometime, so I'd rather let you have me than anyone else. I don't like colored men,» she added, «and the white men all look down on me and despise me and I-I love you,» she whispered, burying her face on my neck. «It'll hurt you at first, Sophy, I'm afraid,» but she stilled all scruples with, «Shucks, I don't care. If I gives you pleasure, I'se satisfied,» and she opened her legs, stretching herself as I got on her. The next moment my sex was caressing her clitoris and of herself she drew up her knees and suddenly with one movement brought my sex into hers and against the maiden barrier. Sophy had no hesitation: she moved her body lithely against me and the next moment I had forced the passage and was in her. I waited a little while and then began the love game. At once Sophy followed my movements, lifting her sex up to me as I pushed in and depressing it to hold me as I withdrew. Even when I quickened, she kept time and so gave me the most intense pleasure, thrill on thrill, and, as I came and my seed spirted into her, the muscle inside her vagina gripped my sex, heightening the sensation to an acute pang; she even kissed me more passionately than any other girl, licking the inside of my lips with her hot tongue.

When I went on again with the slow in-and-out movements, she followed in perfect time and her trick of bending her sex down on mine as I withdrew and gripping it at the same time excited me madly; soon, of her own accord, she quickened while gripping and thrilling me till again we both spent together in an ecstasy. «You're a perfect wonder,» I cried to her then, panting in my turn, «but how did you learn so quickly?» «I loves you,» she said, «so I do whatever I think you'd like then I likes that too, see?» And her lovely face glowed against mine. I got up to show her the use of the syringe and found we were in a bath of blood. In a moment she had stripped the sheet off. «I'll wash that in the morning,» she said laughing, while doubling it into a ball and throwing it in the corner. I turned the gas on full: never was there a more seductive figure. Her skin was darkish, it is true, but not darker than that of an ordinary Italian or Spanish girl, and her form had a curious attraction for me: her breasts, small and firm as elastic, stood out provocatively: her hips, however, were narrower than even Lily's, though the cheeks of her bottom were full; her legs, too, were well-rounded, not a trace of the sticks of the negro; her feet even were slender and high arched.

«You are the loveliest girl I've ever seen!» I cried as I helped to put in the syringe and wash her sex. «You're mah man,» she said proudly, «an' I want to show you that I can love better than any white trash; they only give themselves airs!» «You are white,» I cried, «don't be absurd!» She shook her little head. «If you knew,» she said. «When I was a girl, a child, old white men, the best in town, used to say dirty words to me in the street and try to touch me-the beasts!» I gasped: I had had no idea of such contempt and persecution. When we were back in bed together: «Tell me, Sophy dear, how you learned to move with me in time as you do and give me such thrills?» «Hoo!» she cried, gurgling with pleased joy.

«That's easy to tell. I was scared you didn't like me, so this afternoon I went to wise old niggah woman and ask her how to make man love you really! She told me to go right to bed with you and do that,» and she smiled. «Nothing more?» I asked. Her eyes opened brightly. «Shu!» she cried. «If you want to do love again, I show you!» The next moment, I was in her and now she kept even better time than at first and somehow or other the thick, firm lips of her sex seemed to excite me more than anyone had ever excited me.

Instinctively the lust grew in me and I quickened and as I came to the short, hard strokes, she suddenly slipped her legs together under me and closing them tightly held my sex as in a firm grip and then began «milking» me-no other word conveys the meaning-with extraordinary skill and speed, so that, in a moment, I was gasping and choking with the intensity of the sensation and my seed came in hot jets while she continued the milking movement, tireless, indefatigible! «What a marvel you are,» I exclaimed as soon as I got breath enough to speak,

«the best bedfellow I've ever had; wonderful, you dear, you!» All glowing with my praise, she wound her arms about my neck and mounted me as Lorna Mayhew had done once; but what a difference! Lorna was so intent on gratifying her own lust that she often forgot my feelings altogether and her movements were awkward in the extreme; but Sophy thought only of me and, whereas Lorna was always slipping my sex out of her sheath, Sophy in some way seated herself on me and then began rocking her body back and forth while lifting it a little at each churning movement, so that my sex in the grip of her firm, thick lips had a sort of double movement. When she felt me coming as I soon did, she twirled half round on my organ half a dozen times with a new movement and then began rocking herself again, so that my seed was dragged out of me, so to speak, giving me indescribably acute, almost painful sensations. I was breathless, thrilling with her every movement. «Had you any pleasure, Sophy?» I asked as soon as we were lying side by side again. «Shuah!» she said smiling. «You're very strong, and you,» she asked, were you pleased?» «Great God,»