Hugh Lofting - Doctor Dolittle's Return

"Humph!" said the Doctor. "Good gracious me! Anyway, I'm glad you're safe and sound, Matthew. I was very worried about you. What have we got for supper, Dab–Dab?"

"Fried eggs, cheese, tomatoes and cocoa," said the housekeeper.

"A–a–a–h!" said Gub–Gub, coming up to the table. "Tomatoes!"

"Um–m–m–m, cocoa!" said Chee–Chee. "Good idea!"

"And cheese, hooray!" squeaked the white mouse, scrambling down from the mantelpiece.

"You know, Matthew," said the Doctor when we were seated at the meal, "I think we had better leave Gilesborough alone. What with you giving a policeman in uniform a bath, and my fine being paid by the most prominent lady in the town, I feel we better stay away from there. In fact, I'm very discouraged about the whole business. As I told Stubbins, I had no idea it was so hard to get into jail."

"Well, yer see, Doctor," said Matthew, buttering large slabs of bread, "that's the way it is: when yer wants to get into jail they won't 'ave yer, and when you don't want to get into jail, they takes yer and puts yer there. The whole law, I might say, is a very himperfect hinstrument. But don't you be down–'earted, Doctor. Keep up the good work! After all, yer did get arrested this last shot, and yer didn't even get that far the first time. You see, you got the beginnings of a reputation now. It's easy to get into jail when you got the right reputation."

"'The whole law, I might say, is a very himperfect hinstrument'"

Polynesia, sitting on the window–sill, let out a short "Huh!"

"Yes, but just the same," said the Doctor, "I don't think we should use Gilesborough any more for our—er—experiments."

"That's all right, Doctor," said Matthew, reaching for the cheese. "There's lots of other places. Your reputation will spread. Wonderful 'ow a good jail reputation gets around. Now listen: there's Goresby–St. Clements, pretty little town—and a good jail, too! And I was thinkin'—should 'ave thought of it before—the best thing for you to do is not to bother with banks and charity meetin's this time. Just go and bust the window of the police–station itself—or the Court 'Ouse, whichever yer fancy. They'll be bound to lock you up then!"

"Humph!" said the Doctor. "Er—yes, that sounds a good idea."

"I'll come along with yer, Doctor," said Matthew. "You might not be able to—"

"No, Matthew," said the Doctor firmly. "I am afraid you may get arrested again by mistake. In fact, I don't believe I'll even take Stubbins with me this time. I'll go alone. It will be safer."

"All right, Doctor," said Matthew, "anyway, what makes you most comfortable. But you will see there ain't no bunglin', won't yer? And don't forget, choose the police–station, or the Court 'Ouse, when the judge is there. Use a good big stone, too. My, but I'd love to see it! When will we be hearin' from yer?"

"You won't be hearing from me—if I get into jail," said the Doctor. "But you will if I don't."

The next morning John Dolittle set out for Goresby–St. Clements. This was another long walk from Puddleby and for that reason he made an early start. Dab–Dab had provided him with a large packet of sandwiches and a bottle of milk. He also took with him a good supply of writing–paper and lots of pencils—and of course his notes.

I went down the road a little way with him to see him off. He seemed very happy and hopeful as he bade me good–bye. The last thing he said was,

"Stubbins, if I'm not back here by midnight you'll know I've succeeded. Don't bother about visiting me for a good while. And on no account let Matthew come at all. I'll be all right. Look after the old lame horse. And keep an eye on those moon plants for me. So long!"

Well, that time he did succeed—as we heard later. All the animals insisted on sitting up with me that night to see if John Dolittle would return. When the old clock in the hall struck midnight we knew that he was in jail at last. Then I sent them off to bed.

For the next few days I was kept very busy. Without the Doctor in the house I felt entirely responsible that everything should go well. And there was much more to attend to now than when I had been in charge before.

For one thing, there were the animal patients. Although the number of these calling at the house daily fell off, as soon as it was known that the Doctor was away from home, the sick animals did not by any means stop coming. They all wanted to know where the Doctor had gone. I refused to tell them. Then some of them asked me to give them more of this medicine, or that ointment, which they had been getting before from the Doctor. Next thing, a few who had cuts or bruises asked if I would treat their troubles, since the Doctor was no longer there. Of course in my years of helping John Dolittle in this sort of work I had learned a lot. I bandaged them up and even set a broken bone or two.

I got very interested in the work. I felt proud that I could handle sick cases all by myself. Then I began to notice that the line waiting outside the dispensary door wasn't getting any less each morning, as it had at the start. Once in a while a more difficult case would come in, needing pretty ticklish surgery. I wished the Doctor was there to help me. But he wasn't. Some of these were urgent cases that needed attention at once. There was no one else to handle the work, so I did it.

I began to study John Dolittle's books, volumes he had written on animal medicine and animal surgery. I took on more and more difficult tricks of doctoring—sometimes with my heart in my mouth, scared to death the poor creatures might die under my hands. But none of them did—thank goodness!

Without doubt I was very lucky in this. But also it must not be forgotten that I was greatly helped by knowing animal languages—I was the only one (at that time) besides the great man himself who did. I noticed that more and more the animal patients seemed to have confidence in me. Even when I had to put a stitch in a bad cut they lay wonderfully still, apparently knowing that I would save them all the pain I possibly could.

I began to ask myself where all this might lead me to. My reputation among the animals was growing—the same as the Doctor's had done when he first left the profession of human medicine and took to the care of the animal world. I don't mean to say that I dreamed for one moment that I could take the great man's place. No one living could ever have done that. But as I got busier and busier with the work of the dispensary I did begin to wonder—if the Doctor should stay long enough in prison—whether I too might some day have to run away and hide to get peace and quiet. Anyhow it can be easily understood how a young boy would be tremendously thrilled to find he was doing even as much as I was to carry on the work of so important a person.

But besides my duties as assistant doctor there were plenty of other things to keep me on the go. There were the animal clubs down in the Zoo. I had to keep an eye on Jip and Flip so that they didn't bring in too many new members for the "Home." Feeding them properly these days was the big problem. It required money to do that. (My job as bookkeeper for the butcher had to be kept going too, or there wouldn't have been any money at all.)

And then that blessed little Whitey! In spite of his small size he was all over the place at the same time, poking his cheeky pink nose into everything. He seemed to discover a new family of wild mice or rats every day. He would come to me with a long sad story of their troubles and ask if they could join the Rat and Mouse Club—which I usually found they had done already, before I had given permission.

And I had to take care of the moon plants. This was a big job—keeping notes on weather conditions, rate of growth and goodness knows what more. But this was one of the departments of our establishment which could not be neglected on any account. Not only had the Doctor on leaving instructed me to give it special attention, but I knew that the raising of these food–stuffs from the moon would be necessary for his experiments later on and for the writing of his book. He felt that the very secret of everlasting life itself might be contained in these seeds of vegetables and fruits which he had brought down from that other world. If I let the plants die while he was away, he would never be able to try them out on the creatures of the earth.