Margaret Haddix - Among the Betrayed

Nina stood beside Lee Grant, pulling corn from a row of stalks.

"Leave the small ears to grow," Lee cautioned. "We only need enough for the feast tonight."

"Only?" Nina laughed. "There'll be twenty people there!"

"Forty ears, then," Lee countered. "That's not much. Back home, when my mom was canning corn, we used to pick—"

"What? Forty million?" Nina teased.

In the days since she'd been caught, she'd been staying at Mr. Hendricks's house with Percy, Matthias, and Alia. But she'd spent a lot of time with Lee and already listened to dozens of "back home" stories. She didn't know what it was like at Harlow School for Girls, but at Hendricks, boys were not pretending so much to be their fake identities. They were telling the truth more.

Nina jerked another ear from a stalk.

"Anyway, forget forty ears," she said. "If you're figuring two per person, that's only thirty-eight. I don't think I'll ever be able to eat corn again, not after the way you scared me in the garden last week, midbite."

"More for me," Lee said, clowning a selfish grab around all the corn they'd picked so far.

Nina wondered if this was how normal children acted — children who'd never had to hide. She guessed she'd have a chance to find out now. She, Percy, Matthias, and Alia were being sent on to another school, one where third children with fake I.D.'s mixed with firstborns and secondborns. That was why they were having a feast tonight, a combination of a celebration and a farewell.

"Given how things happened, Harlow School is prob' ably not the best place for you anymore," Mr. Hendricks had told Nina.

Nina had had another flash of remembering that hor-rific canyon of eyes, watching her walk to her doom.

"I… I think I can forgive the other girls," she had said. "Now."

"But are they ready to forgive you?" Mr. Hendricks asked. "No matter how much you reassure them, how much the officials reassure them, there will always be someone who suspects that you just got off, that you really were working with Jason. They haven't… grown up like you have."

And Nina understood. She wasn't the same lovesick, easily terrified child she'd been at Harlow School. That was why she liked talking to Lee now. He'd grown up a lot, too. The other boys looked up to him. They didn't even call him Lee anymore. He was mostly L.G. — and they said it reverently.

Nina still called him Lee. She didn't like too many things changing.

"Nina," Lee said now, slowly peeling back the husk of an ear of corn to check for rot. "Before you leave tomorrow, there's something I've been wanting to tell you."

"What?"

Lee tossed the ear of corn onto the pile with the rest. It must have been okay.

"I've been thinking about Jason," he said.

Nina stiffened just hearing that name. She might be able to forgive her friends at Harlow, but she wasn't ready to forgive Jason.

"So?" she asked.

"Well, I was thinking about what I heard him say on the phone to the Population Police that night he was turning everyone in. He made it sound like you were working with him."

"I know," Nina said. "That's how I ended up in prison." She couldn't keep the bitterness out of her voice.

In one clean jerk Lee pulled another ear from another stalk.

"But I don't think Jason was saying that to get you in trouble. He didn't expect to be arrested, to have you arrested. He meant for the illegal third children with fake I.D.'s to be arrested. I think… I think he was actually trying to save you."

Nina reeled backward, stunned beyond words. Lee took one look at Nina's face and kept explaining.

"Don't you see?" he said. "It wouldn't have made any sense for Jason to say you were working with him if he wanted to get you in trouble. He thought he — and you— were going to be rewarded. He was… he was maybe trying to protect you from ever being turned in by anyone else. See, if years from now someone accused you of being ille-gal, he could pop up and say, 'Nina? How could Nina be an exnay? She helped turn them in!'"

Lee did such a good job of imitating Jason's voice that Nina could almost believe. But only almost.

"Jason was doing something wrong. Evil. He wanted innocent kids to die," she said harshly. She pulled so hard on an ear of corn that the whole stalk came out of the ground.

Lee frowned but didn't say anything about his precious cornstalk.

"Yeah. Believe me, I was pretty mad at Jason myself. But I'm just saying — I don't think he was all bad. I think he, um, really liked you. And that was why he was trying to save you."

Nina stood still, trying to make sense of Lee's words. It flip'flopped everything she'd thought for the past few months. How could she accept Lee's explanation? How could Jason have been so evil yet tried to save her?

For a minute she almost believed. Then she remembered.

"Mr. Talbot had a tape," she said dully. "Of Jason confessing. And he was lying and saying it was all my fault, that I was the one who wanted to turn in the exnays."

"Oh, Mr. Talbot could have faked that tape," Lee said. "I've seen him fake pictures."

"But it was Jason's voice," Nina said. "I heard him. I heard the tape!"

Lee turned back to the garden.

"Go ask him," he said with a shrug.

Nina stood still for a moment, then she dropped her corn and took off running. Hope swelled in her heart. She burst into Mr. Hendricks's cottage and dashed into the living room, where Mr. Hendricks and Mr. Talbot were conferring.

"The tape," she said. "Of Jason betraying me. Lying. Was it real?"

Mr. Talbot turned around slowly, looked at her blankly.

"You had a tape," she repeated breathlessly. "In prison. Of Jason saying it was my idea to betray exnays, my idea to turn them in to the Population Police. Did he really say that? Or did you fake the tape?"

Mr. Talbot blinked.

"Does it matter?" he asked.

"Of course it matters!" Nina shrieked.

Mr. Talbot raised one eyebrow.

"Why?" he said.

Nina had so many reasons, they jumbled together.

"If he didn't betray me, if he was really trying to help me — then he really loved me. Then Aunty Zenka was right, and love is everything, and the world's a good place. And I can be happy remembering him. But if he betrayed me — how can I think about the time we had together without hating him? How can I ever trust anyone, ever again?"

"You've believed for months that he betrayed you," Mr. Talbot said. 'And you still trusted Percy, Matthias, and Alia. You've been acting like you trust Lee and Trey and Mr. Hendricks and me. Don't you?"

"Yes, but…" Nina couldn't explain. "Maybe I shouldn't trust you. You've lied to me a lot."

Nina was surprised when both Mr. Talbot and Mr. Hendricks burst out laughing. "It's not funny," she protested.

Mr. Talbot stopped laughing, and sighed. "Nina, we live in complicated times. I would have loved it if that first time I talked to you in your prison cell, I could have come straight out and said, 'Here's the deal. I hate the Population Police. What about you?' And it would have been great if I could have been sure that you would give me an honest answer. But — can you really see that happening? Don't you see how muddy every' one's intentions get, how people end up doing the wrong things for the right reasons, and the right things for the wrong reasons — and all any of us can do is try our hardest and have faith that somehow, some' day, it will all work out?"

Nina looked down at her hands, still splotched with mud from the garden. She looked back up.

"Was the tape fake or not?" she asked again.

Mr. Talbot looked straight back at her.

"It was fake," he said quietly. "Some of our tech people spliced it together."

A grin burst out over Nina's face. "So Lee was right. Jason did love me," she whispered in wonderment.