Lisa Scottoline - Legal Tender

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Amazon.com Review
Philadelphia lawyer turned novelist (what a concept!) Scottoline has already won a best original paperback Edgar for Final Appeal. Now she might just nail down a hardcover one for her latest book – a lovely combination of high energy, imagination and nasty good humor mostly directed against lawyers. Her central character this time out is a definite keeper: Benedetta Rosato, "Bennie" to everyone but her mother, a towering blonde who rows to keep her body in shape and duels with the police on a daily basis to keep her legal talents sharp. Most of Bennie's clients have a gripe against the cops, so Philadelphia's finest are less than sympathetic to her cause when she becomes the chief suspect in the murder of her ex-lover and soon to be ex-law partner. Hiding out in a truly original way, Bennie uses (and abuses) a big law firm to help find the real killers; you'll find yourself laughing and gasping all the way.
From Publishers Weekly
The heroine of Scottoline's rambunctious fourth legal thriller (after Running from the Law) may change the way readers think about lawyers. Benedetta ("Bennie") Rosato, who narrates, is a ravishing six-foot blonde, one of two partners in a thriving law firm. In quick order, the foundations of her world come crashing down. Her partner and ex-lover, Mark, turns up murdered shortly after he tells Bennie that he is planning to dissolve the partnership. It's not surprising that she then becomes the cops' prime suspect. When the murder weapon is found in her apartment, Bennie goes underground. Then a drug company CEO is killed, and she is falsely accused of that death, too. A hilarious caper ensues as Bennie disguises herself as, variously, a hooker, a bag lady and a lawyer "from the New York office" of a staid old white-shoe firm. In the midst of all her woes, she must also deal with a new boyfriend and a mother who's facing electroshock therapy. The Perry Mason-like ending is a bit strained but doesn't spoil the fun. Bennie, a delightful heroine, deserves an encore; and, again, Scottoline merits a big round of applause. $200,000 combined ad/promo for Legal Tender and the simultaneous HarperPaperbacks edition of Running from the Law; simultaneous HarperAudio; author tour; U.K. and translation rights: Columbia Literary Agency; dramatic rights: Linda Hayes.

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“No, no, no!” Renee cried out, her face contorted with anguish. She shook her head and began to sob. “It was… Eve’s idea. I didn’t want to kill Mark. He didn’t… do anything. She said she’d tell… about Eileen, what we did. She wanted the firm for herself. The new firm, the money.”

I would have cheered the confession, but a wave of exhaustion washed over me, leaving me trembling. My eyes welled up with tears of relief. It was over.

Suddenly Eve bolted past an astounded jury to the judge’s entrance by the dais. Azzic signaled to the uniformed cops, who chased up the aisle after her. Security guards clambered over the emptying pews to where Renee had slumped, weeping. Judge Thompson banged the gavel in vain. Crak! Crak! Crak!

Azzic fought his way up the aisle and stared at me, his eyes flickering with the tiniest twinge of regret, quickly masked.

I wiped my eyes, self-conscious. “Nice policework, Azzic.”

When I looked up he was gone.

40

I woke up lazily the next morning, savoring the sensation of rest and peace. I tugged the comforter to my chin, taking a leisurely inventory: I was safe in my own bed, Bear snored in her favorite spot at my side, and a lawyer banged around in my kitchen. “Hey, you,” I called out.

“Hey, yourself.”

“Come back to bed.”

“I’m busy.” There was the clang of a pot, then cabinet doors opening and closing.

“What are you doing?”

“None of your business.”

“When are you coming back?”

“When I’m good and ready.” The tap was turned on, then off.

“But I’m good and ready now.” I’d been less tired than I thought last night, and this morning I was feeling even less tired than that. Must be the rowing. A useful sport.

“Stop being so bossy!”

“I can’t help it, I’m the boss.”

“Are not, partner.”

I smiled. “Are we partners now? I’ll have to think about that.”

“Rosato amp; Wells is fine with me. I know how shy you are.”

In the next instant I heard it. A gurgle I could identify in my sleep. My heart leapt up. I hoped against hope. “The paper towels are-”

“I found them,” he said, and I snuggled under the covers in delicious anticipation. Life was good. A man with this set of skills was hard to find. I doubted I’d look any further. The aroma of his perfect coffee arrived just as he did.

“Lord, are you rude!” Grady said, naked except for his briefs and theSTUDMUFFIN Mug I’d swiped from Homicide when I’d sprung him. My fee to be a nuisance. And now it was full.

“Coffee!” I sat up and reached for it thirstily. The first sip hit my tongue. It was my third orgasm in eight hours.

“Drink fast. We have something important to do.” Grady sat on the bed and grinned at me.

“More important than coffee?”

“Absolutely.”

“What could possibly be more important than coffee?” I was backsliding into Mae West, but Grady only frowned.

“You think I mean sex? No way.” He plucked his pants from the floor and pulled them on. “Drink up and get dressed.”

“What?”

“It’s all arranged. I fixed it while you were asleep.” He searched for his workshirt. “We have somewhere to go.”

“Where?”

“You’ll see,” he said, and even Bear lifted her ears, intrigued.

Ten minutes later, I was locked in one of Hattie’s pungent bear hugs, pressed awkwardly into the royal flush of shiny playing cards that spanned her bosom. “I’m so happy to see you, so happy,” she said. “Thank God, thank God.”

“It’s okay now, it’s all over.” I hugged her back as hard as I could. I’d gotten home too late last night to stop in and I wasn’t up to seeing my mother then anyway. I’d intended to deal with her after a solid night’s sleep, but Grady had made other plans. Without my permission.

“Come in,” Hattie said, then stepped back and wiped her eyes on the sleeve of her sweatshirt. “Come in, both of you. She’s in her room.”

“How is she?”

“You’ll see soon enough.” Hattie closed the apartment door and shot Grady a look so knowing it made me laugh.

“Have you two been conspiring?”

She smiled. “Me and Grady are old friends, by now.”

He nodded. “We grew up not ten miles apart, did you know that, Bennie? Hattie grew up near the Georgia border, and I was born in Murphy, right over the line.”

Hattie tugged at my arm. “We had ourselves a nice long talk on the telephone. Now let’s go see your momma. She’s awake.”

Grady took my other arm. “Come on, Bennie. I want to meet her.”

I let them yank me along only reluctantly. “Do we have to do this now? What do I say to her? Sorry I sent you to-”

“Say what comes natural,” Hattie said. Bear trotted at the heels of her scruffy bedroom slippers as she and Grady tugged me through the living room. “Did you know your momma knew all about Mark’s murder?”

“She did?”

“Said you told her all about it, at night.” We reached my mother’s door, which was slightly ajar, and Hattie pressed it open.

“My God,” I heard myself say, the sight was so unexpected.

A soft morning breeze blew through the open screen, billowing through the curtains. The room was bright and smelled fresh, only faintly floral. My mother sat in a chair by the bed, still as calm water, reading a newspaper. JOINT VENTURE, said the headline above photos of Renee and Eve. My mother’s hair had been combed into neat waves, and she wore slacks and a pressed white blouse. She seemed not to see me standing at the threshold in wonder.

“Is she… cured ?” I whispered.

“No, but she’s gettin’ there,” Hattie said softly. “Carmella, honey,” she called, “see who’s come home.”

My mother looked up from the paper and her brown eyes opened slightly in surprise. “Benedetta.”

Her voice struck a chord, buried deep. No one but my mother called me Benedetta, and I felt the sound reverberating inside me. Resonating within my chest. Calling me to dinner, or from play. To climb onto her lap. Benedetta.

“Benedetta, you’re free,” she said.

My eyes stung. A lump appeared in my throat. My heart lifted. She didn’t know how right she was, and neither did I.

Until now.

41

Mahogany bookshelves stocked with Supreme Court reporters surrounded the huge, still office. His desk was an English lowboy, bare except for a Waterford cup that held a flock of white quills. Three telephones sat on the various polished surfaces, but they hadn’t rung all morning. There wasn’t a computer in sight, but there was a box of Godiva chocolates on the coffee table. Next to a kitten.

“She’s a cute one,” Grun said. We sat together on a couch covered with navy damask.

“And she’s already litter trained.” I didn’t mention she preferred legal briefs. I was pushing my luck as it was.

“She reminds me of my Tiger. She has a similar color fur.”

“I thought Tiger was striped.”

“Underneath the stripes, she was tan. Brownish.”

“Well, she’s yours, if you want her. She needs a home now that her owner’s on… vacation.” I didn’t tell him Sam was in rehab, since everyone at the firm thought he was at Disney World, switching cartoon allegiances.

“Do you think she likes me?” He tickled Jamie 17 with a wrinkled index finger, but she ignored him in favor of a black Mont Blanc.

“Of course she does. How could she not?”

“You didn’t,” he said, more than a bit resentfully.

“I told you, that was before I knew you.” We had spent the morning together, with me confessing my ruse as Linda Frost and The Great and Powerful forgiving me, at least after I swore to reimburse the firm for the hooker suit and tuna fish.

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