Laurel had seen it as the perfect project for her, physically, psychologically, metaphorically. Clear away the old debris, prune off the dead branches, rejuvenate the soil, plant new with a hopeful eye to the future. Resurrection, rebirth, a fresh start.
She stared down at the mess Huey the Hound had left and heaved a sigh. Young plants torn up by the roots. She knew the feeling…
"Where are you taking Daddy's things, Mama?"
"To the Goodwill in Lafayette," Vivian Chandler said, not sparing a glance at her ten-year-old daughter.
She stood beside the bed that had been her husband's, smartly dressed in a spring green shift with a strand of pearls at her throat. She looked cool and sophisticated, as always, like a model from out of a fashion magazine, her ash blond hair combed just so, pale pink lipstick on. She propped her perfectly manicured hands on her hips and tapped the toe of one white pump against the rug imaptiently as she supervised the proceedings. Tansy Jonas, the latest in a string of flighty young maids, hauled load after load of suits and shirts and slacks out of the closet to be sorted into piles.
"Of course, we'll have to take some of it to the church," Vivian said absently as she considered the armload of dress shirts weighing down poor Tansy. Tansy wasn't more than fifteen, Laurel reckoned, and thin as a willow sapling. The girl seemed to weave beneath the burden of silk and fine cotton cloth, her black eyes going wider and wider in her round dark face.
"It's expected," Vivian went on, inspecting the state of collars and cuffs, oblivious to Tansy's discomfort. "The Chandlers having always been the leading family hereabouts, it's our duty to contribute to the less fortunate in the community. Why, just the other day, Ridilia Montrose was asking me if I hadn't donated Jefferson 's things," she said, frowning prettily. "As if she thought I wasn't going to. She's got a lot of nerve, and I would have told her so if I weren't a lady. Imagine her looking down on me when everybody in town knows they nearly went bankrupt! And what a shame that would have been, because that daughter of hers has teeth like a mule, and it's going to cost a fortune to fix them."
She selected a pair of striped shirts, impervious to the pleading look on the maid's face, and tossed them into one of several piles on the bed. "I told her I just hadn't been up to sorting through Jefferson 's things. Why, the mere thought of it had me on the verge of one of my spells. I can see, though, that I can't put it off a second longer, or there'll be tongues wagging all over town. I swear, that Ridilia isn't any better than she has to be."
Continuing in the same breath, she said, "Tansy, put the rest of those on the chair."
"Yas'm," Tansy murmured with relief, staggering away under the weight of the load.
"I'll sort through your father's things," Vivian said to Laurel. "Never mind that it could send me into a tailspin. I'll donate to the church, but I'll die before I see no-account trash walking around Bayou Breaux in Jefferson 's silk suits. They're going to Lafayette, and Ridilia Montrose can go to blazes."
Laurel scooted off the seat of the blue velvet armchair before the maid could bury her alive. She didn't like this at all. Seeing all of Daddy's things pulled out of his neat closet and strewn around his room caused a hollow, churning feeling in her tummy. She had played in his closet more times than she could count, sneaking in there with her Barbie dolls, pretending his big shoes were cars or boats or space ships. It had been her secret place for when she wanted to be all alone. It smelled of leather and cedar and Daddy. She had sat cross-legged on the floor and felt the legs of his neatly hung pants brush across the top of her head, and pretended they were vines and that she was inside a secret cave in the jungle and that his belts were snakes. Now it was all being torn apart to be given to strangers in another town.
Chewing on a thumbnail, she sidled along the big mahogany bureau, her eyes on her mother. Vivian didn't look bothered at all by what she was doing, unless being cross counted. Laurel didn't think it did. It only meant that her mother would rather have been doing something else, not that this job made her sad. She said it might give her a spell, though, and that was a million times worse than just plain sad. It scared Laurel something terrible when her mother went into one of her blue spells-crying all the time, hardly ever getting out of her nightclothes, shutting herself up in her rooms-the way she had done when Daddy died.
Laurel secretly feared she was going to have the same kind of spells. She had felt that bad when Daddy died. She hadn't wanted to see anybody. And she had cried and cried. She had cried so hard, she thought she might just turn herself inside out the way Daddy had always teased her she would. She and Savannah had cried together. She had slipped into her sister's room through the door in the closet because Mama had told her more than once that she was a big girl now and had to sleep alone. She and Savannah had hid under the covers and cried in their pillows until they almost choked.
Ties came out of the closet next, a whole long rack of them that had hung on the clothes pole. The ties drooped down off the rack, nearly to Tansy's feet. The maid struggled to hold it up high, skinny arms over her head so as to give her employer a good look at the strips of silk. Laurel spotted the blue one with the big bug-eyed bass painted on it and almost giggled as she remembered her father wearing it. His lucky poker playing tie, he had always said with a wink and a grin. Vivian snatched it off the rack and threw it on the Lafayette pile.
"But Mama," Laurel said, her heart sinking abruptly, "that was Daddy's favorite!"
"I've always hated the sight of that tie," Vivian grumbled, talking more to herself than to Laurel. "I thought I'd die of embarrassment every time Jefferson put it on. To think of a man in his position going around in a necktie the likes of that!"
Laurel stepped alongside the bed and reached a hand out to brush her fingertips over the painted bass. "But Mama-"
" Laurel, leave that be," she snapped. "Don't you have schoolwork?"
"No, Mama," she murmured, inching back from the bed, staring longingly after the bass tie as her mother tossed three more on top of it.
"Can't you see I'm busy here?"
"Yes, Mama."
She backed into the corner by the dresser again and pretended to be invisible for a while. She didn't want to be sent to her room. She wanted to be in here with Daddy's things-only she didn't want Mama and dumb old moony-eyed Tansy here rooting through everything.
She wiggled one foot over on its side and back, over and back, over and back, the way Mama always scolded her for on account of it would scuff up her shoes. Laurel didn't care. Mama was too busy throwing out Daddy's things to notice. Laurel wouldn't have cared anyway, because tears were filling up her eyes and she needed something to concentrate on so she wouldn't start to cry and get scolded for that. So she twisted her foot over and back, over and back, and chewed on her thumbnail even though there wasn't much left to chew on.
The fingers of her left hand moved along the top of the bureau, brushing against the edge of Daddy's jewelry case. Because it made her tummy hurt to watch Mama and Tansy, she turned and looked at the heavy wooden box with its fancy inlaid top and shiny brass latch. She stroked her small hand over its smooth surface and thought of Daddy, so big, so strong, always with a smile for her and a stick of Juicy Fruit gum in his pocket.
One big, fat tear teetered over the edge of her eyelashes and rolled down her cheek to splash on the polished bureau. Another followed. She couldn't think of Daddy's being gone forever. She missed him so much already. He was strength and safety and love. He didn't care if she scuffed up her shoes, and he always hugged her when she cried. Laurel couldn't bear the idea of losing him. She didn't want him gone to heaven with the angels the way Reverend Monroe had told her. Maybe that was selfish, and she felt bad about that, but not bad enough to give up her daddy.
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