Lori Avocato - Dead On Arrival

Somehow that didn’t surprise me. Intrigued? Yep. Surprised? Nope.

No one made a sound. I couldn’t help but stare at him.

The guy was tall. About an inch over Jagger. I could still tell by the way he lounged in the chair. Hair a bit shorter than Jagger’s and a deep brown. More slender than Jagger, but not too thin, and ER Dano definitely worked out. A lot.

“As a nurse, Nightingale, you’ll be assigned to patients that need the special care. Mostly on transport,” ER Dano said, and I sat at attention immediately. “For now, you’re just a ride along.”

“Fine,” I mumbled. I had to chuckle at his term of endearment for me until I looked at Jagger.

He looked pissed!

My chuckle turned into a grin-a naughty grin that wanted Jagger to notice. “This is all new to me,” I said, “so riding along for orientation will work fine. I’d also like to get a feel for how the company works.” I watched him to see if there was any indication that he might be involved in any fraud, but so far, all I got was attitude. A bad attitude. The longer I listened to him talk to Jagger, the more I was convinced that ER Dano was a lifer here-but burned out worse than I’d been from my nursing career.

Clearly Dano had gone up in flames a long time ago.

“You sit here, Nightingale,” ER said, pointing to the bench in the back of the ambulance.

My first thought was of motion sickness, but when I looked at the cocky paramedic, I refused to let myself even entertain that nauseous thought. I would sit in the back and not get sick.

From the corner of my eye, I could see Jagger, grinning. He was enjoying this so, again, I had to be “big” about it and not complain-even though I’d kill to sit up front.

And believe me, between the cockiness of ER Dano and good ol’ Jagger, I’d be glad to “off” at least one of them, if not both.

I sat on the bench directly across from the empty stretcher, said a silent prayer to Saint Theresa for the power of antinausea and strapped myself in.

Suddenly the ambulance zoomed out of the parking lot and all I could think of was the ones you see in cartoons-balanced on two wheels!

ER Dano was some character.

This case might be fun…if I lived through today.

I leaned over the sink in the staff’s washroom of TLC Air and Land and splashed cold water over my face. Had to in order to settle my stomach, which ER Dano’s driving had managed to slosh up into my throat.

“Ugh,” I muttered.

“Hello, chéri?” Lilla said, coming in the door.

I looked to the side to make sure no one followed her in. “That ER guy is a pip.”

She grinned, winked and said, “That he is.”

Oh, boy. Maybe Lilla could be useful in getting info from him, since he was the longest-term employee around here. Dano was pretty hot, and it seemed as if Lilla thought so too. Then again, so did I, and Lilla’d had four husbands already! I mean, fair is fair.

Maybe I wouldn’t suggest Dano to her.

Slowly I lifted my head toward the mirror. “Geez. I look like crap.”

Lilla remained silent. I looked closer at myself. Oh, well, I was right.

“Do you have plans for lunch, chéri?”

I groaned. Lunch? Who asks a vomiting woman if she wants lunch? Then again, Lilla didn’t know about my ride-very similar to a Disney roller coaster where you have to be a certain height, follow cardiac guidelines and not be pregnant.

“Chéri?”

I eased myself around toward her-to avoid any kind of quick motion. “Soup sounds comforting.”

She laughed. “Chéri, you are too funny. Comforting? I would have said delicious or something similar. Meet me by the employee door in about five minutes. Okay?”

I nodded. Ick. Motion.

I leaned against the sink. Yet another case where I was miserable, back to nursing, but working with Jagger.

Suddenly I felt much better.

“Hurry up, Sherlock, we don’t have all day,” Jagger said as I approached the employees’ exit to look for Lilla.

“We? Oh, no. Don’t include me. I’m meeting Lilla for lunch. I’ll see you back here,” I said.

Suddenly his hand was on the small of my back, his other was pushing the door open and out we went.

There in the parking lot sat Ambulance #456-with ER Dano at the helm, and Lilla riding shotgun.

For a few seconds I tried to comprehend the situation, but before I knew it, Jagger had me-no, us-strapped into the back of #456, and Dano hit the gas.

I made a mental note to take Dramamine with my daily vitamins until this case was closed.

I looked at Jagger thinking that if we talked about anything, I’d forget that the front of the ambulance seemed to sway one way while the back the other. “So, any progress?”

He glared at me. “You all right?”

Geez. The guy was so astute. “Fine. Just hungry. My blood sugar is probably low. The case? Anything on it?”

“Seems the billing in this place is way out of whack. Dano showed me the daily run sheets and how the paramedics chart.”

“You didn’t know that? I mean how to chart?”

He looked at me. I thought he was about to accuse me of something, but he merely said, “I worked paramedic at a different company. They’re similar but different.”

“Apples and oranges?”

Jagger bent his head and looked at me. Had to want to shake his head, but he held steady. Well, as steady as one could riding with ER Dano.

Just then several packages of gauze sailed off the shelves as Dano made a right. I’d hate to think of what it’d be like if we were going to a 911 call.

“Anyway, we need to get into billing to check things out,” I heard Jagger say. “Lilla can’t do that for us. We need her to run interference.”

“True. She’d be good at that too. Good mind.”

He didn’t look up, but nodded. Then he leaned back and shut his eyes, falling asleep from the life-threatening motion.

I watched him for a few seconds and told myself that surely Jagger would have enlightened me if he knew anything more I should know. Surely.

Dano bit into his roast beef sandwich while a drop of horseradish dripped out the other end. He didn’t even flinch. Not only was this guy hardened about his job, but also about life in general. He was a fun study though, I had to admit.

“So,” I said to him. He didn’t look up. “Are either of the Sterling twins married?”

ER Dano kept eating.

Lilla gave me a shrug.

Jagger took a sip of his black coffee and looked at me over his mug with a what-the-hell’s-the-difference expression on his face.

“Dano, are they?” I persisted, not even sure why I cared.

Dano took another bite, looked at me and shrugged too. Only his shrug looked like he knew, didn’t give a shit and wasn’t about to tell me anything.

Lilla started to ask him about how long he’d worked at TLC and when he perked up and answered “years,” I decided I was spinning my wheels at this meal. I excused myself to leave for the ladies’ room.

No one said a word.

When I got near the front door, I looked at our waitress, who was now sitting at the counter eating a hamburger, and decided I really didn’t need to use the ladies’ room.

“Excuse me. Please tell my friends I have to leave.” I started to dig into my purse for money for my bill.

She motioned her head toward our table. “You with those two hunks? Man, if I were twenty years younger.” She cackled. “That one drinking his coffee. Yum. ’Course, the other one ain’t bad. He could put his shoes under my bed anytime, sweetie!”

I laughed and pulled my empty hand out of my bag. “The hunk drinking coffee will pay my tab.”

With that I was out the door and hailing a cab, which was not an easy feat in Hope Valley. However, obviously by some divine intervention a yellow cab zoomed around the corner just as I raised my hand.