Amy Atwell - Lying Eyes

She wondered why Allie was so silent, but when she dared a look, she saw the man had a gun pointed at her sister’s cheek.

“Follow the Cruiser,” he said.

Cory hesitated. “Allie?”

“Do as he says.”

Mickey lay in the hazy fog between anesthesia wearing off and pain kicking in. He wasn’t eager to regain consciousness, preferring to hold fast to that last memory of Iris appearing, bringing him help, holding him close and asking him not to leave.

Had she actually said she loved him, or had he just imagined that part?

Because he loved her. That much he knew-consciously, subconsciously, unconsciously… He closed his eyes against a wave of dizziness. Recovery rooms always sucked. Like right now he was still hallucinating. No way was Iris here, bending over him with that sad smile.

“Are you waking up this time?” she asked softly.

He opened his mouth, but only a hoarse croak came out. Her lips curved up. That alone improved his mood and energy. “Water.”

She conjured up a plastic cup and tilted a straw to his mouth.

He drank with the thirst of a camel, though he was exhausted after two swallows. He lost track of Iris. Hell, he probably lost track of time. The next thing he knew, he woke up again in a private room. Machines behind him beeped a steady rhythm. The anesthesia had worn off some because his cracked ribs ached and someone had lit a bonfire on his left shoulder.

When he turned his head, he found Iris dozing in a chair by his side. One curl had worked loose from her ponytail to dangle down her cheek. Her russet hair set off the pale innocence of her face as she slept. Had he ever seen her this relaxed?

He’d blown it last night. He had no idea what to tell her about her father-he wasn’t even sure Cosmo had escaped. As for Turner, he thought maybe he’d grazed him, but not enough to slow him down. Turner wouldn’t give up on trying to get those gems. And they still didn’t have the answers they needed from Cosmo.

He’d fallen in love with a woman, and he’d already failed her. Jesus, what was he supposed to say? He slid his gaze toward her again, only to discover she was appraising him with those brandy-colored eyes. A smile cracked his dry lips. It didn’t matter that he felt like a pile of shit-with her, he was a happy pile of shit.

The smile she returned was tinged with sadness. “The doctors say you’re going to be just fine. I’m glad.” She stiffly climbed to her feet. “I wanted to say goodbye before I left.”

His vision sharpened at her tone. “Goodbye?”

“I’ve thought about this a lot, so don’t think it’s a knee-jerk reaction to you-” She pointed to his shoulder as her words dropped off. With a quick cleansing breath, she continued, as if she were delivering a canned speech. “I appreciate everything you’ve risked for me and my family, but this…between you and I…it’s not going to work.” She turned away.

Any fog in Mickey’s brain cleared as her words induced panic. She wasn’t just leaving. She was leaving. “Wait, you love me, Iris. I heard you. You said you didn’t want to lose me-that you wouldn’t let me go.”

She paused, her back still to him. “I’m not letting you go. I’m walking away.” She braved facing him. “I can’t do this, Mickey.”

“Can’t do what?”

She gave a helpless shrug as she leaned back against the doorframe. It tore him up not to be able to wrap her in his arms. “I’ll never understand your job,” she said.

“Iris, I uphold the law.”

“It’s more than that. It’s how you uphold it. You go undercover. You live a life of secrets, of disappearing when you need to solve a crime.” She raked that stray curl behind her ear. “You live a lie for noble motives-I get that, but I can’t be a part of it. And yet, I can’t ask you to give it up-it’s who you are.”

“But if you love me-?”

She shook her head vehemently. “I grew up in that world-my dad off on his crazy ventures, never knowing where he’d gone, when he’d be back. I won’t do that with my adult life. I couldn’t face the day-to-day secrets-the questions, the fears, wondering whose life you might be saving at the risk of your own. Whether you were hiding the truth or lying to me, I’d become bitter, and that’s no future for us.”

“I wouldn’t lie to you.”

“Really?” Her brows shot up, and her tone implied she knew otherwise. “And does your mother know you’re pretending to be a jewel thief? Does your father even know you’re in Las Vegas?”

“That’s different-”

“Is it? If you can’t trust your parents with the truth, how could you ever trust me?”

He recalled that he’d asked her to call his parents. He looked her in the eye. “It’s my job.” That was one truth he knew.

She smiled sadly. “As it should be. But it doesn’t have to be my life. I’m sorry.” She bent and pressed her soft lips to his cheek. Teardrops mingled with her kiss. Without waiting for a reply, she covered her face with one hand as she turned and hurried blindly out the door.

Mickey pushed himself to sit upright, the sharp stab from his fractured ribs nothing compared to the tight pressure squeezing his chest until it hurt to breathe. To think. To exist. He’d found a woman worth loving, a woman who believed the best in him even when she thought the worst, but she couldn’t face the reality of his career.

He thought of the life Iris had planned for herself. A sensible husband, a stable career, a regular schedule. While he’d do almost anything for her, he couldn’t give up who he was. Being a cop was his life-it was all he’d ever wanted. And now he understood that while Brian’s death had been a tragedy, the real tragedy would have been if Brian had allowed Suze to talk him into quitting. Brian had lived his life doing what he loved, being as complete a person as he could be instead of the shadow his wife had tried to make him.

At least Iris wasn’t asking him to do that. She was brave enough to love him and let him go, and she was expecting him to do the same.

Maybe that was best for both of them, but that sure didn’t stop it from hurting like hell.

By the time Hunter dropped Iris off at her apartment building, she’d successfully pulled her emotions back within a fragile shell, grateful they were no longer zapping her like exposed wires. She hadn’t really expected Mickey to understand. Sure, he saw what he did as heroic-and it was-it was just she wasn’t prepared to be the selfless heroine and watch him taunt death everyday. To wait endless hours and wonder if she’d ever see him alive again-no, she couldn’t bear that. She shouldn’t have to. She didn’t want to.

But then, he hadn’t asked her to. He’d made no move to stop her when she walked out. A humbling reminder that she’d confessed her love for a man who’d only sworn to protect her and her family. Granted, he’d offered to risk his life for her, but now she knew he did that every day.

She exited the elevator to find Foote guarding her apartment door, crisp and alert.

“You must have gotten some sleep,” Iris said as she fitted the key in the lock.

“Nearly six hours.”

“Lucky you.” That was six hours more than she’d gotten.

“Do you want me to come in and go through the apartment?” he asked as she opened the door a crack.

Her shoulders slumped. “Must we? Seriously, after the night we all had last night, none of those men would be stupid enough to be lying in wait inside my apartment.” Letting herself in, she closed the door softly and leaned against it. Right now, solitude wasn’t only welcome, it was a necessity.

A shadow of movement made her breath catch. Apparently, one man was stupid enough to be lying in wait for her.