David Dun - At The Edge

In the den were two soft leather chairs in dark brown and a fabric couch in earth tones. There were two beautiful oils, one of Laura Fischer and one of Maria in her late teens. On his desk and the shelves behind were photographs of his wife and daughter. Most were of Maria. Dan winced at some indefinable thought about Amiel Fischer and his daughter. For a moment he couldn't put his finger on it. Then he knew: Amiel felt he had lost Maria and so he had surrounded himself with her pictures. The parallel with Dan's own life was unmistakable. Amiel pushed a button on a disc player and soft jazz came on.

"What do you drink?"

"Mostly beer, but Dewar's and water is good."

"I have that." He opened a massive liquor cabinet with one of the best stocks Dan had ever seen. The Dewar's was way in the back in the economy class. Up front were twenty-five-year-old Glenlivet, Crown Royal, and the like. Amiel poured him a heavy tumbler, more than he could possibly drink and stay rock-hard sober.

"I hear you're a big football fan."

"Yeah, that's true. Niners."

"Well, of course I'm a Rams man myself. USC coach and I get together all the time. In the off season we watch tapes when he's getting ready for the next season." Dan nodded appropriately.

"Not to change the subject but I listen to my wife. She says my daughter is at least a little bit fond of you."

Dan sighed, and sipped his drink. At least Amiel was getting right to the point.

"One thing I'll say for you, Mr. Fischer."

"Please call me Amiel."

"You don't waste a lot of time with small talk."

"That comes later. I know you're no weak sister. Maybe you drink a bit much lately, but you've got guts. Why should I waste time on trivialities?"

"We each have our issues-Maria and I-so we both get jumpy when you use words like 'fond.' "

"So you do this pretend thing?"

"Well, I'm not sure it's all pretend, but more or less. Yeah. We gotta be saying it's one thing while maybe we're doing something else."

"I love my daughter more than life itself. At the moment I'm afraid it's not mutual."

"Actually, I think it is."

"You do?"

"I think she desperately wants to find a way back."

"Do you love her?"

"I don't know. Maybe on occasion it's starting to feel something like that, but that has to stay between you and me."

"I confess I've done some checking. Probably not right. I found out you're a good man. I run across Jeb Otran from time to time. I called him."

Dan shook his head and smiled.

"If you end up together, I would really like to get to know you. When it's appropriate."

"I understand," Dan said.

"What do you think of her boyfriend, Ross?"

"I don't know him very well."

"Come on."

"She's falling out of love with him, but she'd never tell you or me that."

"She was never in love with him. He was the opposite of me. That's all he had going for him."

"And you think deep down she wants somebody like you?"

"Not just like me. A New Age man who's you know- sensitive. Respects women as they call it. I mean I respect women, but you know, I don't try to get in touch with my feminine side. I stay firmly attached to my balls."

Dan laughed. ''Yeah, I can see where you and your daughter must get down and dirty when you fight."

''We've both got strong wills. Now how you gonna knock her boyfriend off? You going to wait till he falls off a cliff or push a little?"

''Amiel, I don't know if we should be having this conversation. You know she's gonna pump me for everything we talked about."

"That's what I like about you. You got character. I'm just overanxious. I only have one daughter."

"Amiel, when there's something to talk about, we'll talk. And if you have any hope that your grandchildren won't be fathered by a state biologist, you should let it rest and give it time. Maria and I are a long way from anywhere. I'm not getting in the middle of whatever you and your daughter have going."

"Smart man. But promise me something."

"What?"

"Promise me you'll tell me when you fall in love with her."

Dan thought for a moment. "Fair enough."

"And one more thing. What's said on the trail stays on the trail."

"And I gather that goes for the den too?"

"The den too." Amiel chuckled. "Hey, before you go, I wanna show you something. Play of the century."

Grabbing a remote, he hit the play button and there were the 49ers and the Rams.

Dan knew this had to be a setup. Amiel must want to know if he really understood his football. This he relished.

There was a knock on the door. Amiel punched off the player.

"We need full concentration for this."

Maria opened the door, looking slightly impatient.

"Well, boys?"

"Just one play, dear, just one play." Again he pushed the button. Niners had the ball on their own thirty-yard line. The snap, handoff, and a run up the middle that made a forty-yard gain, but for one lucky tackle, it would have been a touchdown.

"What did you see?" Amiel asked.

"Interesting the way the Niners countered to the short side of the field from the left hash. They took advantage of the defense's fear of Jackson's speed to the strong side."

''Get some eyes, Young," Maria interjected before Amiel could speak. "The Rams were in a Split-six D with the tackles pinching hard. The pulling right guard has no leverage, running into the tackle that way. Notwithstanding the forty-yard gain, the Niners would have been better served to have faked the play up the middle, and play-actioned on the tight-end delay." She paused. "That would have been six points."

Wanting to get even, Dan thought for a second. "You embarrass all your boyfriends in front of your daddy?"

"Now you're jerking my chain. Let's go."

They tore Nathaniel away from Nintendo and chocolate chip cookies, then said good-bye to Amiel and Laura Fischer. Everybody looked a little overanxious except Amiel, who appeared unfazed.

Once in the car, Maria turned her attention to Nate.

"So you are a real Nintendo player."

"She doesn't seem old enough to be your mother. She's good at Nintendo."

"Yes, my mother is good at lots of things."

"Your father's nice too."

''Yes, in his old-world way, I guess he can be charming.'' She looked at Dan as she said it.

"He was a real card. And he loves you. That I can guarantee."

"And what did you find to discuss?"

"Not much. Amiel headed into forbidden territory pretty fast, and we ended up talking about the fact that we shouldn't be talking about what we were about to be talking about. It was obvious he thinks about you all the time."

"And what exactly did you two discuss?"

''Well, we never really got there. It was more a discussion about what we weren't going to discuss?"

"Which was?"

"Well, how can I discuss that?"

"She's getting mad, Dad," Nate said.

"Thank you, Nate," Maria said. "That was well said."

"Yeah. Well, Amiel was-" Dan began talking with one hand, but no words were coming.

"He was talking about my boyfriend. He was asking you if you and I were romantic. And all I want to know is what you said."

"I said we shouldn't discuss it. That you and I were a long way from anywhere. And I said you had issues."

"You probably made it sound like we're on the threshold of the promised land but for my 'issues.' You were supposed to say that we're in Egypt and living with Pharaoh, with no travel plans, no travel arrangements, and no travel agent, for God's sake. And what was that crack about you being my boyfriend?"

"You were supposed to act like an enviro."

"Oh and what's that like?"

"Barefoot, stupid, hair under your arms. And nothing about football."

Nate laughed.

Back in Palmer, Dan dropped Nate at home with Pepacita before taking Maria to her car. They talked easily, Dan driving a circuitous route. When they pulled up behind the Cherokee, they both went silent. After nervous smiles, Dan helped Maria put her luggage in her car, then came around to close her door. She was about to get in and then hesitated. For just an instant in time he knew that kissing her would be the most natural thing in the world. They were looking right at each other-not talking. With a slight smile she held out her hand. Then before he could react, she dropped it and hugged him. It was somewhere in between a brother hug and a boyfriend hug. She kissed him on the cheek.