Simon Green - The Dark Side of the Road

Finding our way back was easy enough; all I had to do was follow our footsteps. And by the time enough snow had fallen to cover them, the great house was already looming out of the mists, right ahead of us. Penny made a harsh sound of relief and plunged past me, forcing her way through the snow with all the strength that adrenalin and desperation could provide. She scrambled up to the front door, tried the handle, and the door wouldn’t open.

Penny looked back at me. ‘It’s locked! Someone’s locked the door!’

She tried the heavy iron knocker, but it was frozen to the door, and she couldn’t budge it. She beat on the door with her fist, but the thick glove soaked up most of the sound. Penny ripped her gloves off, and then cried out despite herself as the bitter cold seared her bare skin. She hammered on the door with both fists, calling out as loudly as she could. No one answered.

‘Get out of the way, Penny,’ I said. ‘I’ll kick the door in.’

‘Don’t be stupid!’ she snapped, not looking round. ‘Look at the size and weight of the door! You couldn’t budge it! Nothing human could.’

I was pretty sure I could kick the door right off its hinges if I got annoyed enough, but even as Penny was speaking the door swung suddenly open, and Jeeves looked out. He saw the body in my arms and fell back. Penny plunged past him, and I followed close behind.

Jeeves slammed the door shut the moment Penny and I were inside. The sudden warmth of the hallway was a blessing, and the heavy wooden door shut off the howl of the rising storm. The manor house had been built to keep the world and all its problems outside. Penny leaned against the wall, her eyes closed. Her face was dangerously pale, and she was shuddering violently. I wasn’t. I put the Colonel down, set his head in his lap, and then stretched slowly.

Penny’s eyes snapped open, and she glared at Jeeves. ‘Who locked the bloody door?’

‘I’m sure I don’t know, miss,’ said Jeeves. ‘But you really shouldn’t have gone outside without telling anyone. If I hadn’t happened to be in the hall …’

‘We would have frozen to death,’ I said. ‘And no one would have noticed till it was far too late. Whoever locked that door knew what they were doing.’

Jeeves looked at the headless body, sitting cross-legged and quietly melting into the thick carpeting. He didn’t seem particularly upset, or affected. ‘Mister James … Dead, all this time, and we never knew it.’

‘Someone knew,’ I said.

And then people came running down the hall to join us, to see what was happening, attracted by our raised voices. Walter and Melanie emerged from a side door, while Roger and Khan came out of the drawing room. Diana and Sylvia came hurrying down the stairs. They all ended up standing together in the hall, packed tight into a small crowd of anxious faces, staring at the Colonel. The severed head in his lap drew most of their attention. I looked from face to face, but everyone appeared equally shocked and horrified. Except for Jeeves, who seemed to be taking everything in his stride and was studying everyone else as closely as I was.

Walter stepped forward, leaning heavily on his walking stick, jerking his arm free from Melanie’s grasp. He reached out a shaking hand to touch James’ face, and then his hand dropped away. Walter seemed to collapse in on himself, suddenly so much older and frailer. Melanie was quickly there to take hold of him and give him her strength to lean on. She gave all her attention to Walter, didn’t look at the Colonel at all.

Walter looked at me, his eyes full of tears. ‘It can’t be James,’ he said. ‘I can’t have lost my son. Not like this. Not so soon after getting him back …’

‘I’m sorry,’ I said.

Diana stepped slowly forward, her gaze fixed on the Colonel’s frozen face. ‘What have they done to you, James? I wanted so much to see you again, but not like this. Oh Walter; our baby’s dead …’ She turned to the man who used to be her husband, to comfort him, but Melanie was already there, blocking the way. Diana took in the cold implacable look on her replacement’s face and turned away. Sylvia was quickly there, to hold and comfort her friend.

I turned to Jeeves, as he seemed to be the only one who still had all his wits about him. ‘Jeeves! Where can I put the body? It needs to be somewhere safe and secure and out of the way. With a door we can lock.’

‘Of course, sir. There is a side room down here, on the left; only used for storage now.’

‘Show me,’ I said.

Jeeves started down the hall, and I picked the Colonel up. Everyone fell back, to give me plenty of room. I went after Jeeves. He stopped before one particular door, produced a large key ring with many oversized keys, and unlocked the door. He pushed it all the way open, and I carried the Colonel through. The room was dark and gloomy, and distinctly chilly after the warmth of the hall. It was full of piled-up old furniture and other junk. There was a table to one side, so I put the Colonel down on that. The body was still locked in its cross-legged position. I settled it carefully in place, and then took the head out of the lap and put it back where it belonged. The frost on the face was starting to melt, running down the impassive features like so many slow tears.

‘Sorry about this, Colonel,’ I said quietly. ‘I’ll come back when your body’s had time to thaw and lay you out more respectfully. I know you’re usually very firm about not interfering with evidence or crime scenes; but I couldn’t leave you outside. Alone. In the cold and the dark. Why am I here, Colonel? What did you bring me here to do? Was the danger aimed at you, all along, or were you killed trying to protect one of your family? I promise you; I will get to the truth of all this, Colonel … James.’

I left the room without looking back.

I stood thoughtfully in the hall as Jeeves locked the door. It was all very still, very quiet. I could just hear the murmur of the storm outside.

‘Who else has a key to this room, Jeeves?’

‘No one, sir. I have the only key. I am in charge of all the keys to this house.’

‘Then you hang on to them, and don’t let them out of your sight. Don’t let anyone else take them. No one is to go into this room until the police get here. For any reason.’

‘I feel I should point out, sir, that I work for Mister Belcourt,’ Jeeves said carefully. ‘But since those are very sensible instructions, I have no problem following them. Mister Belcourt … seems too upset to take charge, for the moment.’

I went back to join the others, who were still standing close together in the hall, looking at the spot where the Colonel’s body had been. A large patch of melted snow was soaking into the carpet.

Diana emerged from the drawing room, carrying two mugs of hot steaming liquid. She gave one to Penny, who made low murmurs of contentment as she warmed her hands on the mug, and then gave the other to me. She smiled weakly. ‘It’s just the hot toddy, I’m afraid. All I could lay my hands on, at short notice. You need something to warm you up.’

‘Yes,’ I said. ‘Thank you, Diana.’

I sniffed at the dark steaming liquid, winced internally, and then knocked the stuff back in several quick gulps. A hearty glow coursed down my throat and built a fire in my stomach. Good stuff, in its own way. Penny tried to do the same, and then yelped as she all but scalded her mouth. I hadn’t realized it was that hot. I kept drinking, at a slower pace, until I’d finished it all, and then handed the mug back to Diana. Penny sipped doggedly at her toddy, glaring balefully at me over the rim of her mug. Colour was slowly coming back into her face, and the hands holding her mug weren’t shaking anywhere near as badly.