Макс Коллинз - Quarry in the Black

“Okay, Raymond.”

“And you’re right, it’s an uphill battle. McGovern comes across weak when really he’s strong, and then there was that lousy break with his V.P. pick.”

The guy McGovern had chosen for vice-president had a hidden history of mental problems, including electroshock therapy and suicide attempts. He’d had to replace the guy with a Kennedy in-law.

“What I’ve been meaning to say to you,” he said, his dark eyes holding me so tight it was as if his hands were doing it, “is that I greatly appreciate you joining this campaign. Coming on board like you have. I’m aware of your military service, and I value that service, beyond anything you might be doing for the Coalition.”

“Thank you, sir.”

Half a smile formed. “You may lose respect for me when I tell you that I didn’t serve. I tried to. But I was a felon, and they wouldn’t take me. That was what you’d call a wake-up call. I was already clean, but the bad things I’d done... well, there’s always a price to be paid, isn’t there?”

“There is.”

“I have to admit that I came around to realizing I’d been lucky not to go. That Vietnam was a bad war, an immoral war, but I came to that realization from a distance. You were on the scene, Jack.”

When the VC rushed Hill 55, trying to take out the First Division Sniper Platoon, I found myself in my first firefight. I’d never seen anything like it, never been in anything like it, but my buddy Bill helped me survive it. He was killing them as fast as they came at us, and while I only froze up for what was probably seconds, that was long enough for Bill to take that bullet for me. Bill Young, who never got older. He had that blacker-than-black skin, too. The red stood out so vividly on flesh like that.

“It means so much to us,” Lloyd said, “having you stand beside us. Providing us with the credibility you bring to the protest.” He unfolded his arms, leaned elbows on the table, raised a palm as if he were swearing in at court. “Now I understand that you don’t feel comfortable with public speaking, that you don’t want to be singled out. But I wish you’d reconsider, Jack... though I will respect your decision otherwise.”

“I’ll think on it, sir.”

“Please, just... Raymond.” He swigged some more Bud; he was getting used to it. Funny what you can get used to. “And, uh... about you and Ruth...”

He’d shifted gears so fast I could hear them grind.

That resonant voice became more intimate. “She’s a wonderful young woman, Ruth. I’m glad to see that you two are... getting along so well.”

He’d been keeping a closer eye on me than I could ever have imagined.

Too casually, he asked, “Has she... has Ruth... discussed with you...?”

“I’m aware of your relationship, Raymond.”

He lowered his gaze. “I can tell that you disapprove. You were talking to my wife, earlier.”

Jesus!

“Marianne is a wonderful woman,” he said, his smile sad now. “The best wife, the best mother... and, I don’t have to tell you, lovely. So very lovely, and I am so very lucky. But I am weak and the Lord is strong.”

“That’s quite a cop-out.”

Another half-smile. “Yes, I suppose it is. I grew up on hard streets, but that’s no excuse. I was sold poison and later I sold poison. My life in those days was all about two things — poison and pussy. I shook the first habit, but I’ve always had that weakness for the second.”

Maybe I was nobody to judge.

“Of course, Jack, after a while, riding the horse, you don’t even care about pussy. Just that spike in your arm. If they hadn’t busted me, I’d be long dead. If I hadn’t met Jesus in prison, I’d be dead, too.”

I resisted asking what Jesus was in for.

“In a lot of ways... in most ways, if I might brag a little... I have turned my life around. I serve the Lord and serve my black brothers and sisters. You know, I do a lot of traveling, Jack. When I’m home, with Marianne at my side, around me here at home, I might be tempted but I never give in. But when I’m on the road, spreading what I hope is a message of faith and freedom and non-violence, away sometimes for weeks... I have on occasion... slipped. With Ruth, her keen intelligence and her remarkable beauty...”

Not necessarily in that order.

“...I was too weak to resist. I’m struggling now, to hold onto my marriage. I told Ruth what we had just had to be over, that it could not go on, and she was hurt, of course... but at the same time she has been understanding. More than I could ever hope. But Marianne is still hurt, so terribly hurt, and I have so much rebuilding to do. So I tell you, frankly, that it’s a relief to see Ruth with a nice young man like yourself.”

Okay, this was a little creepy. He was basically saying, Thanks for fucking my girlfriend so I can maybe get back with my wife. But he had a way of making it sound noble. With that voice, and all that damn charisma, he could read you a grocery list and you’d say, “Right on, brother!”

I’d had enough of this, so I asked, “What are you working on so hard in your study?”

“What am I writing? My speech for Saturday. It’s so very important. Missouri could be in McGovern’s column, I just know it could. And the eyes of America will be on us — the media’s taking a great interest.” He sighed. “It’s just too bad such a dark cloud hangs over us now, what with André’s death.”

“He didn’t die of a heart attack, Raymond. His throat was slit. That was a drug deal gone wrong. With your background, surely you must know that.”

He nodded, his expression grave. “André saved my life in prison. Do you know what that feels like?”

His name was Bill Young.

“Yes,” I said.

“I tell you, André took the Lord into his heart, too. He was born again inside that terrible place. I thought he’d really straightened himself out, broken out of his personal prison. I’ve tried to help. Given him a place, a role, where he could become a different person, a good person.”

“But he stayed the same person, didn’t he, Raymond? I spotted him the first afternoon at the Coalition. In country...” Nam. “...I was around a lot of guys using, as you might suspect. And he had all the signs.”

Lloyd was shaking his head, not looking at me. “I know, I know... and his death will dredge up all of my past. Turn it from something I triumphed over into a wretched thing that will make people think I am still part of that world.”

“But you’re not?”

The question surprised him. Maybe hurt him.

“Of course not, Jack.” He swallowed, looked away. “But the timing is unfortunate. After the speech, it was my intention... well, never mind.”

“After the speech what?”

His shrug was barely perceptible. “I was about to clean house. Staffers have reported... suspicious behavior... and I’d resolved to let André go. And someone else has to go, too, but I’d rather not go into that. It’s too... hurtful.”

I knew who that someone must be.

“Raymond,” I said, “when you say you planned to cut them loose... would you have handed them over to the police or the federal authorities?”

“I would have cut ties with André and his co-conspirator. And I would have shared my suspicions with the authorities, yes. The sooner they could be stopped, the better. Street drugs are a kind of self-genocide for my people, Jack. The one thing my sorry background does for me is that I can speak with authority on this subject. When the presidential campaign is over... well, a major change will be made at the Coalition. That I promise you.”

He offered me his hand and I took it and shook it.