JASON STARR - Panic Attack

“What can I say?” Adam said. “Maybe you should become a cop.”

“Maybe I should,” she said seriously. “But what about Marissa?”

“What about her?”

“I don’t like that she’s alone with Xan.”

“I’m not crazy about that either, but as soon as the police find his address I’m sure they won’t dilly- dally. They’ll send somebody right over there.”

“I think you should at least call her and let her know what’s going on. Better yet, tell her to come home. Tell her we want her here.”

“How’m I supposed to do that?”

“Please, just do it. I really want her here with us right now.”

While Adam knew his mother was overreacting, he was concerned about her getting too upset, what with her heart condition. Besides, he’d rather have Marissa home with them right now, too.

From his BlackBerry, he called her cell.

“Hello,” Marissa said.

“Where are you?” Adam asked.

“At Xan’s, what’s up?”

“Is he there with you right now?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Can you go into another room for a second please?”

“Why? What’s going on?” There was panic in her voice.

“Nothing bad,” he assured her. “I just need to talk to you in private for a second.”

Marissa took a deep breath, then another. “What is it?”

“Are you in another room?”

“Yes.” She was annoyed.

“We want you to come home,” Adam said.

“Why?”

“Because Grandma and I want you here, that’s why.”

“What for?”

“We just do, okay?”

“Look, I told you, I need some space-”

“Please don’t argue with me about this, Marissa. I want you to come home- without Xan.”

“Why can’t I bring Xan?”

“Can he hear you?”

“No, but why did you-”

“Please try to keep your voice down. I just want you here, okay? I want the whole family to be together. Just the family.” He knew this explanation was flimsy, but it was the best he could come up with.

“I’m not coming home, and I can’t believe you. You scared me. I thought there was some emergency or something.”

Adam shook his head and looked at his mother, who stage- whispered, “Tell her.”

“Look, you can’t tell Xan about this, but there’s something going on with the police, okay?”

“Why can’t I tell Xan?”

“Keep your voice down.”

“Why’re you being so mysterious?”

“They want to talk to him, okay?”

“To Xan?”

“Yes.”

After a short silence, Marissa asked, “Why?”

“I’m sure it’ll all be routine, but we’d rather you were here, so please don’t argue with me.”

Adam’s mother said, “Come home, Marissa,” probably loud enough that Marissa could hear.

“I don’t understand what’s going on,” Marissa said. “What does Xan have to do with anything, and why’re you both freaking out?”

“We’re not freaking out,” Adam said. “There’re just some things I’ve been concerned about, and-”

“Wait, you did this?”

“I didn’t do anything-”

“What did you tell the police about Xan?”

“Can he hear you?”

“You’ll say anything, won’t you? Now what’re you trying to do, say that Xan killed Mom?”

“I said keep your goddamn voice down,” Adam said, raising his own voice.

“You’re pathetic, you know that? I can’t believe you’re doing this.”

“There’re things you don’t know, okay? Things that seem very strange-”

“Strange, that’s a good one. You know what seems strange to me? You. Yeah, you. The way you acted last week, on your big ego trip, then everything that happened with Mom, and now trying to blame my boyfriend, who I’m in love with. You’re the one I should be staying away from.”

“Marissa, plea-”

“Just leave me the hell alone.”

“Marissa… Marissa?… Marissa?” He realized she wasn’t there. “Damn it.”

“What is it?” his mother asked.

“She hung up on me.”

“Call her back.”

Adam tried but got her voice mail.

“Shit. Goddamn it.”

“What?”

“I think she turned her phone off.”

“Oh my God, so now how’re we supposed to get in touch with her?”

“Okay, let’s try to stay rational here. You’re getting very carried away, okay? There’s nothing to panic about. It’s not like she’s in any danger.”

“How do you know?”

“Let’s just wait, okay? Clements is probably on his way over there. The police have ways to-”

Adam’s landline rang. The display read restricted.

“Who is it?” Adam’s mother asked.

“I don’t know,” Adam said. He picked up and said, “Hello?”

“Dr. Bloom.”

“Hi, Detective Clements,” Adam said so his mother would know who was calling.

“Is it possible Xan has a roommate or uses another name besides the one you gave me?” Clements asked.

“Not that I know of,” Adam said. “Why?”

“We can’t find any listing for him in the entire city. There’s an Alexander Evonov in Brighton Beach, but you said he was living in Red Hook, right?”

“That’s what I understood.”

“It’s probably a different guy, but we’ll check it out. In the meantime, can you call your daughter?”

“I’m trying to reach her.”

“When you do, can you get Xan’s address and let me know it right away?”

Adam said he would.

With his mother hovering over him, Adam called Marissa several times and kept getting her voice mail before the first ring. There was no doubt her phone was off.

“Okay, let’s not panic, okay?” Adam said. “It didn’t sound like Clements was panicking. He probably knows that this whole idea of Xan having anything to do with any of this is very far out.”

“And what if you’re wrong? What if Xan killed Dana? What if he’s some kind of maniac?”

“Don’t worry, she’ll be fine,” Adam said. “I’m absolutely sure of it.”

“Oh, God, that man is beyond annoying,” Marissa said to Xan. “Can you believe he told the police to talk to you? What is wrong with him?” They were on Xan’s couch, in the middle of the afternoon. He was holding her hand, caressing the inside of her wrist with his fingertips.

“Why would he tell the police to talk to me? I mean, I was with you when you talked to that cop, and if the cop wanted to ask me anything he would’ve asked me right then.”

“I know,” Marissa said. “But I have to admit it, it scares me.”

“Scares you how?”

“I think my dad’s getting desperate. Why else would he bring you, of all people, into it? Next thing he’ll be telling the police to talk to my freaking grandmother.”

“So you think he’s trying to take the blame away from himself?”

“Exactly. I don’t know how I’m going to be able to handle this- if my father really killed my mother.”

“Shh, don’t worry, you’ll get through it,” Xan said, squeezing her hand.

“I don’t want to see him again,” she said. “The sound of his voice just… just disgusts me.”

“Does he know where I live?” Xan asked.

“My father? I’m not sure. Why?”

“I just wonder if he gave the police my address, that’s all.”

“I didn’t tell him,” Marissa said, “but I guess the police will find you anyway. I’m so sorry my father’s dragging you into this, after all you’ve done for me, just being here for me. You’ve been so great.”

“Don’t worry about me,” Xan said, “You’re the only thing I’m concerned about. Is your phone off?”

Marissa nodded.

“Good,” he said. “Keep it off. You don’t need any more stressful phone calls today.” He kissed her gently on the cheek and then said, “How about something to drink? Water, Diet Coke?”