Рекс Стаут: In the Best Families

She blinked. “You mean you would?”

Hammond giggled. He was a full-sized middle-aged man and he looked like a banker, and I want to be fair to him, but he giggled. “Look out, Annabel,” he said warningly. “He might.”

“Of course,” I told her, “you would be in the line of fire, and I’ve never shot a fast-moving dog, so we would both be taking a risk. Only I don’t like you being skeptical. Stick around and you’ll see.”

That was a mistake, caused by my temperament. It is natural and wholesome for a man of my age to enjoy association with a woman of her age, maid, wife, or widow, but I should have had sense enough to stop to realize what I was getting in for. She had said that she had come to watch me work, and there I was asking for it. As a result, I had to spend a solid hour pretending that I was hell bent to find out who had poisoned one of Leeds’ dogs when I didn’t care a hang. Not that I love dog-poisoners, but that wasn’t what was on my mind.

When Calvin Leeds showed up, as he did soon in an old station wagon with its rear taken up with a big wire cage, the four of us made a tour of the kennels and the runs, with Leeds briefing me, and me asking questions and making notes, and then we went in the house and extended the inquiry to aspects such as the poison used, the method employed, the known suspects, and so on. It was a strain. I had to make it good, because that was what I was supposed to be there for, and also because Annabel was too good-looking to let her be skeptical about me. And the dog hadn’t even died! He was alive and well. But I went to it as if it were the biggest case of the year for Nero Wolfe and me, and Leeds got a good fifty bucks’ worth of detection for nothing. Of course nobody got detected, but I asked damn good questions.

After Annabel and Hammond left to return to Birchvale next door, I asked Leeds about Hammond, and sure enough he was a banker. He was a vice-president of the Metropolitan Trust Company, who handled affairs for Mrs. Rackham — had done so ever since the death of her first husband. When I remarked that Hammond seemed to have it in mind to handle Mrs. Rackham’s daughter-in-law also, Leeds said he hadn’t noticed. I asked who else would be there at dinner.

“You and me,” Leeds said. He was sipping a highball, taking his time with it. We were in the little living room of his little house, about which there was nothing remarkable except the dozens of pictures of dogs on the walls. Moving around outside, there had been more spring to him than to lots of guys half his age; now he was sprawled on a couch, all loose. I was reminded of one of the dogs we had come upon during our tour, lying in the sun at the door of its kennel.

“You and me,” he said, “and my cousin and her husband, and Mrs. Frey, whom you have met, and Hammond, and the statesman, that’s seven—”

“Who’s the statesman?”

“Oliver A. Pierce.”

“I’m intimate with lots of statesmen, but I never heard of him.”

“Don’t let him know it.” Leeds chuckled. “It’s true that at thirty-four he has only got as far as state assemblyman, but the war made a gap for him the same as for other young men. Give him a chance. One will be enough.”

“What is he, a friend of the family?”

“No, and that’s one on him.” He chuckled again. “When he was first seen here, last summer, he came as a guest of Mrs. Frey — that is, invited by her — but before long either she had seen enough of him or he had seen enough of her. Meanwhile, however, he had seen Lina Darrow, and he was caught anyhow.”

“Who’s Lina Darrow?”

“My cousin’s secretary — by the way, she’ll be at dinner too, that’ll make eight. I don’t know who invited him — my cousin perhaps — but it’s Miss Darrow that gets him here, a busy statesman.” Leeds snorted. “At his age he might know better.”

“You don’t think much of women, huh?”

“I don’t think of them at all. Much or little.” Leeds finished his drink. “Look at it. Which would you rather live with, those wonderful animals out there, or a woman?”

“A woman,” I said firmly. “I haven’t run across her yet, there are so many, but even if she does turn out to be a dog I hope to God it won’t be one of yours. I want the kind I can let run loose.” I waved a hand. “Forget it. You like ’em, you can have ’em. Mrs. Frey is a member of the household, is she?”

“Yes,” he said shortly.

“Mrs. Rackham keeping her around as a souvenir of her dead son? Being neurotic about it?”

“I don’t know. Ask her.” Leeds straightened up and got to his feet. “You know, of course, that I didn’t approve of her going to Nero Wolfe. I went with her only because she insisted on it. I don’t see how any good can come of it, but I think harm might. I don’t think you ought to be here, but you are, and we might as well go on over and drink their liquor instead of mine. I’ll go and wash up.”

He left me.

Having been given by Leeds my choice of driving over — three minutes — or taking a trail through the woods, I voted for walking. The edge of the woods was only a hundred yards to the rear of the kennels. It had been a warm day for early April, but now, with the sun gone over the hill, the sharp air made me want to step it up, which was just as well because I had to, to keep up with Leeds. He walked as if he meant it. When I commented on the fact that we ran into no fence anywhere, neither in the woods nor in the clear, he said that his place was merely a little corner of Mrs. Rackham’s property which she had let him build on some years ago.

The last stretch of our walk was along a curving gravel path that wound through lawns, shrubs, trees, and different-shaped patches of bare earth. Living in the country would be more convenient if they would repeal the law against paths that go straight from one place to another place. The bigger and showier the grounds are, the more the paths have to curve, and the main reason for having lots of bushes and things is to compel the paths to curve in order to get through the mess. Anyhow, Leeds and I finally got to the house, and entered without ringing or knocking, so apparently he was more or less a member of the household too.

All six of them were gathered in a room that was longer and wider than Leeds’ whole house, with twenty rugs to slide on and at least forty different things to sit on, but it didn’t seem as if they had worked up much gaiety, in spite of the full stock of the portable bar, because Leeds and I were greeted as though nothing so nice had happened in years. Leeds introduced me, since I wasn’t supposed to have met Mrs. Rackham, and after I had been supplied with liquid, Annabel Frey gave a lecture on how I worked. Then Oliver A. Fierce, the statesman, wanted me to demonstrate by grilling each of them as suspected dog poisoners. When I tried to beg off they insisted, so I obliged. I was only so-so.

Pierce was a smooth article. His manner was, of course, based on the law of nature regulating the attitude of an elected person toward everybody old enough to vote, but his timing and variations were so good that it was hard to recognize it, although he was only about my age. He was also about my size, with broad shoulders and a homely honest face, and a draw on his smile as swift as a flash bulb. I made a note to look up whether I lived in his assembly district. If he got the breaks the only question about him was how far and how soon.

If in addition to his own equipment and talents he acquired Lina Darrow as a partner, it would probably be farther and sooner. She was, I would have guessed, slightly younger than Annabel Frey — twenty-six maybe — and I never saw a finer pair of eyes. She was obviously underplaying them, or rather what was back of them. When I was questioning her she pretended I had her in a corner, while her eyes gave it away that she could have waltzed all around me if she wanted to. I didn’t know whether she thought she was kidding somebody, or was just practicing, or had some serious reason for passing herself off as a flub.